anyone with kids out there?

[jodielynn519]

I have a now two year old and use a manual wheelchair (TiLite ZRA) in a few months you could try this: http://www.leapsandbounds.com/catalo...mSource=Search

[tinytina]

This thread really spoke to me because as a young couple (I am 25 and my fiance is 27 years old - he is a complete para) the idea of whether we can or should have kids anymore seems really up in the air. Its just another question mark since his accident.

[woman from Europe]

I didn't plan to get pregnant the two first times. Like most people I was married and suddenly I was pregant like everybody else, SCI or not, so my oldest is 28 and the next 25. At that time they did not give people with SCI birth control with hormones.

The small one is made with ICSI, different father and he had bad sperm and I had cut the tube after the second. LOL, I am not to fond of children, I wasn't sure if I wanted and now I have three.

[PhoenixFiresky]

I have had Dermatomyositis (a muscle weakening illness) since I was 15. I had a serendipity pregnancy and raised my son mostly alone. Some things had to be adapted - I couldn't chase him, so he wore one of those kid leashes (first a harness, then when he was old enough to understand, a wrist wrap). In stores, he was taught that if he wanted to walk, he had to keep one hand on the cart at all times. I couldn't play actively with him, so we'd fly kites together instead. Honestly, I don't think he ever noticed those
were disability accommodations.

Today he is 24 and I am happy to say that he is just as comfortable around people using wheels as he is around pedestrians. It's just life as usual to him.

[Saranoya]

Originally Posted by woman from Europe

I am not to fond of children, I wasn't sure if I wanted and now I have three.

Well, that's an opinion like any other ... but I truly hope none of your kids know about it.

I don't have any children (yet). I would like to change that some day, but so far I haven't come across the kind of person I would want to be the father of my children, and well ... whatever else you might want to say about being disabled, there's definitely nothing attractive to it.

So if it ever happens -- if I ever come across someone who can love me exactly the way I am, and whom I can love back -- I'll be ecstatic, and yeah, children will most likely be in my future. But if it never happens, I think I can be happy that way too.

To all of you who do have someone you love and who loves you, but are debating whether or not to have children, I want to tell you not to let whatever physical limitations you have stand in your way. Good parenting, beyond the first three years or so, is mostly a question of mind over matter. If the love and the motivation are there, the rest will eventually work itself out somehow. If they're not, though ... you're screwed, and so are your kids.

I was born to a teenage mom, who dropped out of college to raise me, and a father who literally told her I was her child, not his, when it became clear that my brain had a manufacturing defect (the consequences of which are also known as cerebral palsy). Despite the fact that my mother did a pretty decent job under the circumstances, I wouldn't wish my childhood on anyone. So my advice to all prospective parents would be: look before you leap.

[TheyCallMeMommy]

I had a seizure due to Autonomic Dysreflexia while having my 1st child, so when we got pregnant (an unplanned blessing) the 2nd time, I was a wreck. But sometimes you just have to let go of those feelings and enjoy life. Any one of us could die tomorrow...but that's no reason to stop living today!

[trekker6]

I have custody of my 11 year old daughter, if I die she goes to her alcoholic mother and there's not a thing I can do about it. If my daughter gets my estate, her mother would spend it all partying leaving nothing for my daughters future, I've taken steps to prevent that, but if the mother goes to court on my daughters behalf, she might possibly prevail, I have to stay alive long enough to see my daughter through college, I'm 60, so at least ten more years would do it.

[SCI-Nurse]

Originally Posted by trekker6

I have custody of my 11 year old daughter, if I die she goes to her alcoholic mother and there's not a thing I can do about it. If my daughter gets my estate, her mother would spend it all partying leaving nothing for my daughters future, I've taken steps to prevent that, but if the mother goes to court on my daughters behalf, she might possibly prevail, I have to stay alive long enough to see my daughter through college, I'm 60, so at least ten more years would do it.

Have you explored setting up a trust with your daughter the beneficiary, and someone other than you ex as trustee?? This can be done, and would allow your daughter to get your estate but keep your ex's hands off it, at least directly. The custody issue should also be explored with your attorney.

(KLD)

[47+years]

I was told I could never get pregnant, so the first one was a surprise. (She is now 45, a very loving person and my best friend after my hubby.) Her brother was born two years later. Seven years later we had another boy. My husband has heart problems in his family, so I was actually more concerned about him not living long enough to raise our children. I guess I kind of felt invincible! We now have nine grandchildren. I look back and realize how naive we were, but it all worked out for us. I am 68 so I guess I'm one of the old geezers.

C5/C6