Perception..

[quad79]

One of Dustin's old co-workers found out about my injury and he called to talk to Dustin and say he was sorry.He said he thought he and his family had had a rough year and that he and his wife sat down and thought of how fortunate they were compared to us. He preceded to tell Dustin that his wife had problem after problem with her ears and eventually lost most of her hearing. She eventually found out that she had cancer in both ear drums. She had them removed and prosthetic ones in place now. The cancer had moved further and she underwent chemo. So far she is cancer free @ this point. He also said their son was born with what was thought to be a lazy eye and to make a long story short,he has some sort of eye disease and is now blind all together. He is now 2.


I exclaimed to Dustin,"I hope you told him his situation was much worse!" He asked me how I thought that. To my husband he thinks that my paralysis is the worst thing that could've happened to me.
Now don't get me wrong, there are days I hate this shit and I have many "woe is me" days,but really!To me, that child being blind is much worse. I know it's all he'll ever really know and he'll adjust much better than someone would facing blindness later in life.Maybe a blind person would say they'd rather face darkness than to not walk. I guess it's all in how we perceive things. I just know there are so many beautiful things in this world and I'd rather see them. I just feel that nothing is sweeter and breathtaking than watching a child discover things, looking at the sunset over the ocean, seeing wildlife dance and fly before you without a care, being in the woods and just looking up at the leaves and tall, tall trees,watching animals romp and play so innocently,sitting right before a river and watching the water roll over the rocks,looking up at a snow capped mountain. The list goes on.


Not to mention- her cancer. That's some scary stuff there. She is cancer free now ,but there's always a chance it may return causing death or future loss of limbs and or body parts. Now secondary problems caused by SCI may do the same to me in the future, but cancer is something I don't want my family members or I to experience!


I know everyone is different and that's what makes the world go round.I already know without asking that some of you feel paralysis is by far the worst thing that could happen. Every injury,every situation is different. I just know that in my situation and that with being c7,it's not the worst thing that could've happened to me. Besides blindness and cancer, there are always auto-immune diseases and brain injuries. How do you feel?

No fighting!

[momo3]

I can understand where you are coming from. My daughter's teammates father had a stroke 14 days ago. It was a brain bleed type stroke on the brain stem. He was not supposed to survive but he did. The family is grateful that nothing is paralyzed-that more than anything seemed like the worst thing.

I sit here saying the this SCI is horrible but I am coming to terms with it. I look at cancer, etc. to be much worse. Ask me this question two years ago and I would have answered different.

[Mona~on~wheels]

Children hurting in anyway is worse.
I'm like you the child blind at two is worse.
Think of all the kids at St Jude's with cancer.

C-7 is hard when you don't have a pca.
But as long as I get up and down, this wc aint's so bad.
Not for everyone, those with pain.
But I'm pretty much pain free when I take my medicine.
If I had a van with a lift I'd be a happy camper!

But children are worse. I don't want to see any child hurt.

[2jazzyjeff]

I've had this topic come up before with friends. I'd much rather have paralysis than being blind. Hell, chop off an arm while you're at it too. To me, blindness is the worst for reasons you described above.

[Evonne]

being blind is worse.....my husband and i just had a discussion about this the other day. For me right now just being 1 yr PO this SCI really sucks, maybe with time it will get better but i also fear that......aging with the sci, prob. not a pretty sight either

E

[Buffie]

I think I would definately choose sci over blindness or cancer. I love being able to absorb my atmosphere and appreciate things more from just observing. I also had a friend who had a c5/6 injury since she was 21 and she died from cancer 5 years ago at age 45. Watching her suffer was enough to let me know that I am blessed now even with sci and all.

[Polett]

I think its a catch 22... As a quad, I can see all of the things I'd like to do, but cannot physically accomplish it... If I was blind, I guess I could physically do it, but the lack of sight would probably put me on a side bench too for certain activities....

I still don't believe that there are "better" or "worse" disabilities, I just think that it depends on how we cope we our winning ticket, and the support behind us.

[kap]

whoa, maybe my husband would feel differently but to think of my child blind? I would hate to see them suffer. Plus the wife had cancer in her ears, so close to her brain. That's some scary crap. Who's to say it won't come back?

I hate to be doom and gloom but at least with Rob's injury we know what we're working with.

[Keiser]

being paralysed all my life I can honestly say, I would rather it this way than say paralysed at 15yo. I've never known what it was like to play abled bodied sport or do most of the things I cant do which admittedly isn't much, because of my inability. To be honest I don't really care about that either. I know for a fact tho that I would loath to have had a normal life till 15 then have paralysis cursed on me - that would do my head in I'm sure. I'd hate to be blind but rather it over paralysis...

Other peoples Perception befuddles me no end tho...

[trainman]

I'm with Polett, everyone's perception of a disability is different. I would think blindness, especially at such a young age, would be pretty bad. On the other hand, most people would think being a quad since age 3 is bad as well. To me, it's normal, as I would assume it will become for this boy as well.

Asking a blind person if they would like to have their site, but a non-functioning body would probably seem pretty bad. I'm sorry your friends had these problems and, from my perspective, I would say they had the worse year. Is she able to hear after her ordeal though?