Kate's On Line Journal

[AKO]

just checking in , no need to reply to my post..I'm just babbling

[Obieone]

OMG .... its pouring rain and I heard thunder last night ...... yahoo .. Spring has sprung .... so we get bogged down in the mud instead of snow drifts .... oh well its a tad warmer ... we'll take it !!!!

Hope everyone is hanging in and on ! We're getting ready for another graduation in our house this June ..... 3 down and one to go {{{whewwww} .... Laure-Jane is only 12 so we get a reprieve for a few years before the next one !! Bill is having trouble remembering things .. I think maybe we need to evaluate his meds but we haven't got a doctor here right now .. they don't seem to want to hang around on the prairies very long before they move on ... we import them from overseas and once they become Canadianized (?) they're outta here ... actually we do have one doc here {from Iraq if you can believe it} but she isn't very familiar with sci and isn't ER ready plus she is very very busy serving a huge area so we have to go much farther to see a doctor who can help us ..... the joys of rural life ... other than that we're maintaining ..... hope everyone out there survived the Winter .. anxious to hear how you'all are doin' .....

Obieone

[roshni]

Obieone,

Spring is definitely in the air and these strikingly beautiful colors - plum, pink, yellow, green - have got me in the mood to read poetry and think long crazy thoughts all day. Aaah...

[kate]

Originally Posted by roshni

Obieone,

Spring is definitely in the air and these strikingly beautiful colors - plum, pink, yellow, green - have got me in the mood to read poetry and think long crazy thoughts all day. Aaah...

roshni, I recommend Mary Oliver for that kind of mood:

" . . . tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"

[darthe]

Hi Obieone
I've just been lurking here again this week after a long time of not posting. Springtime in San Diego means here come the rains. It has been a very mild winter but still too cold for my son Chris to go out. He has such a difficult time with temperature regulation. I wonder how you northerners do it.

Kate, I'm going to check out your poetry recommendation, it sounds like just the mood I need to get in.

Darthe

[kate]

Darthe, I'm with you on the question of Obi does it--and I don't just mean the weather. She's been quietly radiating strength and warmth from the great White North for as long as I've known her.

I got to see Mary Oliver read last winter here in Seattle. Amazing woman! Here's a whole poem:

The Journey

One day, you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice—
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do—
determined to save
the only life you could save.

-----------------

I've loved this poem for a very long time . . . the sense of what it means to "stride into the world" has changed for me over all these years, lol--when I was young I thought it was about taking responsibility and making choices for myself. Now that I have been intimately involved with my sci husband and our daughters, I hear it a different way. "Saving my life and moving into the world" now has to do with some kind of refusal to let circumstances separate me from those I love, no matter what.

[darthe]

I saved this to savor. "and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as you own". That resonates as I try to find my own life and learn to honor my own needs after a long journey through mothering, wife-ing and now caregiving. Thanks Kate.

[Jesse's Mom]

I have never posted anything In Kates Journal but I am sitting here this morning catching up on CC having been pretty much gone from this site since February. A few posts about exercising has made me start thinking about Jesse and his "therapy". He seems to have gotten to a point in this injury where he feels all he wants to do is the standing frame, the total gym, and his FES bike. He never does anything else. He is so busy with his days....working bees, practicing rugby, working on his jeep. I wanted him to go to Minneapolis and try some braces for his legs. He wont do it. He says he is just too busy. I feel so bad, like he has given up. He actually doesnt care anymore if he walks or not. He is living his life as before, even better according to him, but I so wish he could take time out to do some kind of exercises. He is very good at doing the standing and the other machines. I cant make him do anymore. Well, I guess I am not asking for advise or anything, just wanted to get my thoughts out of head today.

[cheesecake]

Kate and I met on a street corner in Crystal City. We hugged and held on to each other at random, crazy momennts during the 3 days. It was as if we knew each other for ever...and perhaps we have. I am still checking into the elementary school name, Kate. We were both in Duluth and grade school at the same time.

Wow, I feel like I found a sister, if not biological one connected by the soul and pain of SCI.

[krajaxa]

I haven't posted here for a while either... I still come and check the new posts, but that's about it. I guess I just stay busy with the boys...
Jesse's mom, I'm in pretty much same situation. Hubby just stretches in the mornings, he will do e-stim every other day, but that has been about it for quite a while. He keeps telling me he is gonna start standing on braces again, but there they are - collecting dust in the corner. He spends most of the day caring for the boys (since I work full time), and the two-year olds just wear him out, so he has no energy to do too much in the evening when I get home, so I understand recovery has not been his priority lately. I do have to admit, that his depression has been gone for almost two years now. He has been cutting down on his meds lately too, he is weaning himself off what he knows he can.

Anyways, glad to see everyone still checks in here...

You all take care of yourself!

krajaxa
(a wife to t10 and mother of twin boys - 3/27/04)