Deep breaths...

retto76 · 08-08-2012, 03:07 PM

I have been on SSDI since 2004. About 2 years ago, I returned to work part-time. I found it insanely fulfilling as well as insanely exhausting! Much to my joy, I was recently offered a full-time position starting in August. I teach biology at a community college.

I have been nervous about being able to handle this, and as the fall semester approaches my anxiety is certainly increasing, but in a good, excited kind of way! It will be such a big change for me, as well as for my kids - who will now be going to Gramma's house after school while I teach.

Sounds pretty neat, right? Well, yesterday, due to huge amounts of stress at his work and their lack of ability to resolve ongoing issues, my husband put in his resignation. I couldn't hardly sleep last night (I have insomnia issues anyways), I threw up once, and have felt sick to my stomach all day today with worry about finances and more. Instead of being excited about my new position and prepping my classes, I am distracted and worried about how we're going to do this if my husband can't find another job. His job pays pretty well. With my SSDI and part-time employment added in, we were doing pretty good. My salary will be nowhere near as high as his, and I will be losing my SSDI.

Then I think about health insurance. He has incredibly good insurance at his work - expensive but great coverage. I don't get insurance benefits starting until after 90 days of employment, which means on top of the lack of income, we will have to be paying for COBRA for 3 months so that I don't have the pre-existing condition clause biting me in the ass. I've been trying to get a new power chair since September. It was going nowhere for ages, then I switched to a new sales person. It suddenly has started moving forward, and now I don't know if it will happen in time - and of course we've already reached our out-of-pocket max for the year, so the power chair wouldn't cost us anything!! And who knows how my new plan will cover DME stuff. And what about all of my docs and specialists that know my history and I have a relationship with? I hate the idea of maybe having to start over if our insurance changes. My PCP is wonderful and has done a good job of looking out for me with all of my repeated, resistant UTIs.

My house is mostly accessible, I love most of my neighbors, my kids go to a good school, and my parents live on the next street over from us, so my kids have a great relationship with them. I feel like our home and all is being risked, and it scares me. We did quite a few summer projects in the yard, and so we don't have much in savings right now. So the financial instability in the next few months is all I can think about when I try to focus on my school prep work.

Oh, and my absolute favorite PT guy, who I regard as a good friend as well, let me know yesterday that he got a position at a different physical therapy clinic in town, and he will be leaving my place in 2 weeks. I cried after I left to go home. He is so much better than any other PT I've ever worked with, and I felt a real bond with him that I haven't felt with the other PTs - even though I like them too.

Deep breaths. Yesterday was rough. Gotta remember all of the good things going on in my life, concentrate on my beautiful kids, and try to not focus on the "what-ifs". I know that other people have bigger problems than this, but these are really big to me. Change is hard, and everything will eventually work out, but when I'm laying in bed at night and unable to sleep, it's hard to keep those "what-ifs" away

triumph · 08-08-2012, 04:14 PM

Sorry to hear your situation, but it's wonderful you are successful in your career, as shown in your job promotion to full time.
Have you checked with Social Security to pin down exactly when your extended benefits will cease. It used to be about 18 months after full time employment, but with you working part time, maybe it's different. You need to make a request for further benefits to make sure you can tolerate full time work. I would suggest you consider a face to face meeting with someone at Social Security to go over your situation. The issue of continuing Medicare should be included in your discussion.

Surprised your husband is resigning just at this critical moment for you.

Best of luck. Sometimes things require a day by day plan, not the whole future.....which can be too frustrating at times.

08-08-2012, 03:07 PM	#1
retto76 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Northern Illinois Posts: 172	Deep breaths... I have been on SSDI since 2004. About 2 years ago, I returned to work part-time. I found it insanely fulfilling as well as insanely exhausting! Much to my joy, I was recently offered a full-time position starting in August. I teach biology at a community college. I have been nervous about being able to handle this, and as the fall semester approaches my anxiety is certainly increasing, but in a good, excited kind of way! It will be such a big change for me, as well as for my kids - who will now be going to Gramma's house after school while I teach. Sounds pretty neat, right? Well, yesterday, due to huge amounts of stress at his work and their lack of ability to resolve ongoing issues, my husband put in his resignation. I couldn't hardly sleep last night (I have insomnia issues anyways), I threw up once, and have felt sick to my stomach all day today with worry about finances and more. Instead of being excited about my new position and prepping my classes, I am distracted and worried about how we're going to do this if my husband can't find another job. His job pays pretty well. With my SSDI and part-time employment added in, we were doing pretty good. My salary will be nowhere near as high as his, and I will be losing my SSDI. Then I think about health insurance. He has incredibly good insurance at his work - expensive but great coverage. I don't get insurance benefits starting until after 90 days of employment, which means on top of the lack of income, we will have to be paying for COBRA for 3 months so that I don't have the pre-existing condition clause biting me in the ass. I've been trying to get a new power chair since September. It was going nowhere for ages, then I switched to a new sales person. It suddenly has started moving forward, and now I don't know if it will happen in time - and of course we've already reached our out-of-pocket max for the year, so the power chair wouldn't cost us anything!! And who knows how my new plan will cover DME stuff. And what about all of my docs and specialists that know my history and I have a relationship with? I hate the idea of maybe having to start over if our insurance changes. My PCP is wonderful and has done a good job of looking out for me with all of my repeated, resistant UTIs. My house is mostly accessible, I love most of my neighbors, my kids go to a good school, and my parents live on the next street over from us, so my kids have a great relationship with them. I feel like our home and all is being risked, and it scares me. We did quite a few summer projects in the yard, and so we don't have much in savings right now. So the financial instability in the next few months is all I can think about when I try to focus on my school prep work. Oh, and my absolute favorite PT guy, who I regard as a good friend as well, let me know yesterday that he got a position at a different physical therapy clinic in town, and he will be leaving my place in 2 weeks. I cried after I left to go home. He is so much better than any other PT I've ever worked with, and I felt a real bond with him that I haven't felt with the other PTs - even though I like them too. Deep breaths. Yesterday was rough. Gotta remember all of the good things going on in my life, concentrate on my beautiful kids, and try to not focus on the "what-ifs". I know that other people have bigger problems than this, but these are really big to me. Change is hard, and everything will eventually work out, but when I'm laying in bed at night and unable to sleep, it's hard to keep those "what-ifs" away

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Vent Weaning - Breaths Per Minute	Joey_SF	New SCI	0	04-26-2012 02:22 PM
19" deep x 18" wide J2 Deep	Bspill1	Equipment & Services	0	03-17-2010 05:38 PM
‘Deep and Crisp and Eaten’: The Scottish Deep-Fried Mars Bar	Max	Food	0	12-17-2004 03:37 PM
Shallow swimming is in as deep ends are deep-sixed	Max	Spinal Cord Injury News	0	06-27-2003 06:48 PM

08-08-2012, 04:14 PM	#2
triumph Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Michigan Posts: 216	Sorry to hear your situation, but it's wonderful you are successful in your career, as shown in your job promotion to full time. Have you checked with Social Security to pin down exactly when your extended benefits will cease. It used to be about 18 months after full time employment, but with you working part time, maybe it's different. You need to make a request for further benefits to make sure you can tolerate full time work. I would suggest you consider a face to face meeting with someone at Social Security to go over your situation. The issue of continuing Medicare should be included in your discussion. Surprised your husband is resigning just at this critical moment for you. Best of luck. Sometimes things require a day by day plan, not the whole future.....which can be too frustrating at times.