It takes time for all of us especially when we are trying to see how things work. My husband is c-4/c-5 incomplete and we have three kids 3,4, and 8. When he got hurt our youngest was 1, she was so happy to see him that she climbed up on his chest in the bed. No matter what he is still daddy. We have learned that it might take a little longer for him to do things with the kids, but he does. He helps with homework, feeding( they all feed one another). Coaching the kids in sports and he really helps when the kids get sleepy and they are to heavy to carry, because they climb on daddy and go to sleep. So, it is a learning process for you and them, but the good part is that you learn how to do things together. When he climbs in your lap overtime he will know exactly how to sit and you will know how to hold him and operate your chair like a pro.