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Thread: just a little ranting to clear my head...

  1. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by skippy13
    Families... geez they sound awful.
    Wish I had some.
    K, were do ya live, I'll put the breeders on the first greyhound.
    (naw, I couldn't do that to you)
    Deborah

  2. #12
    So Virgo, what drug are they on? Because hocking your kid's toys is absolute, plain proof that your sister is A.) Bipolar or B.) On drugs. Period. Case closed. Sorry if you were unaware. I'm gonna go with methamphetamines here. That's always been the culprit with my brother, when he starts stealing from me and hocking my stuff.

    If her kids are in and out of the system since birth and she's stealing from you, she is caught in an addiction she can't control. If I were you, I'd figure out what it is and I'd start protecting the rest of the family.

    I know you didn't ask for advice, but when those 2 leave for milk and don't come back, they're off ingesting drugs. I've been through it with my brother and his wife. It's too bad you're not in a position to rescue the kids, but if you're not, you're not. It's not your fault. You are morally obliged to protect your son and, to some degree, your parents though. It's a dirty job, but somebody's gotta do it.

    Sometimes all you can do it cut them off.

    You need to check out this message board.

    http://methamphetamineabusediscussio...iscussion.html

    I doubt what I'm saying here is any surprise. I'd bet my bottom dollar drugs are the issue here, all that behavior is SO predictable. I don't think the bipolar thing is likely, or it wouldn't be both of them going off the rails at the same time. If these 2 are on meth, your kid isn't safe. And the meth monster is kinda like SCI, it knows no boundaries, it hits good families as well as bad ones.

    This letter, written by an addict now clean, kind of sums it up...

    Dear Family:

    I am a meth addict. I am your son or daughter, your brother or sister, your mom or dad, your husband or wife, and I am a meth addict.

    You dont know me anymore. I dont know me anymore. Please dont act surprised by my insane behavior. Please dont expect anything from me except lies and manipulation. Please hide your valuables, because I will steal them if I have to just to get more meth.

    I dont know why I do meth, and I dont know why I cant stop. Part of me wants to, but most of me doesnt. I am angry most of the time if I dont have any meth, and I am on top of the world when I do have meth. Nothing else matters to me except meth.

    I know I'm supposed to love you, but right now the only thing I am capable of loving is meth. I love meth more than I love my life, more than I love anything else in the world.

    I would die for meth. I might even kill for meth. And when I have run out of meth, I may become violent towards anyone who tries to get in my way.

    I know you dont understand it, and neither do I, but it is where I am at right now and I don't know how change it, or if I even want to. I believe that I cannot live without meth, and that if I try to, I will die. In fact, I would rather die than live without meth.

    I am sick and tired, but I cannot stop. I will say anything to get you to help me get more meth. Anything. I will promise to go to rehab. I will tell you I need money for food. I will do anything, even sell my own body, to make sure that I never run out of meth.

    As long as you keep believing my lies, I will use you to get what I need, and what I need is meth, and only meth.

    When I am high, I feel no emotions. I feel nothing except invincible. You can threaten me all you want, I will not care one bit. I am confident and I dont need any of you as long as I have my meth.

    When I am crashing, I am a monster. Stay away from me. I will not hesitate to do or say whatever I can to hurt you, because misery loves company and I am miserable without meth.

    I am delusional and I will blame you for everything that is wrong with my life. I am paranoid and I know people are following me and that you are part of the conspiracy. I trust no one. I put all of my faith, all of my loyalty in meth, and only meth.

    You dont know me anymore. I dont know me anymore. I am but a shell of a human being now, so dont come looking for your son or daughter, your brother or sister, your mom or dad, your husband or wife, in me. I may look like that person to you, but that person is gone, for now.

    I am a meth addict. It is a full time job.

    Help me get more meth, or leave me alone. I do not need you unless you will help me feed my burning desire for meth. So either help me do that, or just stay the hell away from me.

    One last thing: I know you are disappointed in me, but believe me, nobody is more disappointed in me than I am. The only thing that relieves my shame and guilt and remorse is...meth.

    Signed,

    Me

    http://methamphetamineabusediscussio...ts-repost.html

  3. #13
    Hi bethany,
    Well, don't know about it being meth. - I do know they accuse each other of various things all the time. The woman is NOT my sister, it's my brothers g/f.
    I read a report that she had from a shrink once, she left it in the car. She stuff she told the shrink a work of fiction. But still he saw enough to say -
    She exibts narsissium, and a lack of remorse for maniplulating others.
    She is considered- boderline personality disorder, I know for a fact she is a drug seeker, I've known her to go to 3 Dr.s in one week for the same thing. forever going to the ER for pain shots.
    She doesn't drink, or smoke pot. pills are her drug of choice. She justifies it by saying it's a perscribed med. BUT, if she can get a bottle of something, she'll try anything to get you to give her yours, or it'll vanish one day. She accused her 4yr old of hiding a bottle of vicodin the other day-30 pills- because she insisted she could not of 'eaten' that many in 2 days. The kid insisted she did take them (they know better than to touch her stuff)
    She never says 'I took a pill' it's "I ate a pill"
    My brother is a occational pot smoker-never around the kids or at home. Frankly, with this chick around, who can blame him? LOL.
    other than that, he doesn't drink, or smoke cigs or take pills. he won't even take the ones he is supposed to.
    No, he takes off when he thinks his temper will make him do something crazy. and he has allways been babied and never had to take responsabilty for anything. She does it because she is out for herself. She doesn't want to have to take care of anyone or anything. she will work hard on getting money from people, but not trying to get a actuall job. every time she was pregnant, it was 'poor me' -that why she had them. you can get more stuff.
    example: I have seen her go to food banks, churches,free clothing centers for stuff, with money in her pocket and hundreds on her food stamp card.
    She'll get items given to her, then clean them up, and take them to a store and return them. then bring them here to eat the food I buy- gee, I don't get food stamps? were do those go? traded for things.
    Well, in the beginning I tried to be helpful, tried to help out with the kids, but now I just keep mine away from them, I have to take care of my own. I make sure that the baby has diapers, the other kids are ok, but not at the expense of my kid. The baby is allways here BTW.
    The kids went to foster because they have become unruly and they don't listen to adults, the'll run down the street, go in peoples yards ect. and those people get pissed off and call on them. Both parents think this is allways a personal attack on them. well, yeah, it is. the kids are not phyically in danger from getting hit or anything as far as i can tell. If they were in a old trailer park, they would be normal i guess,lol. but where we live, kids do not run the streets.
    Deborah

  4. #14
    Yeah, after I posted, I realized it was your brother's woman, sorry about that.

    I swear to you, I think something is off here. Maybe she is that messed up from prescription drugs but I really don't remember ppl ever stealing from family for Vicoden (except the vics themselves, they'll def steal those!) I have one old friend that was in a few car wrecks and the pills took over her life, she stole mine when I got out of rehab. Her kid ran kinda wild but never to the point of foster care. Of course, they literally did live in a trailer park LOL. And she does truly love her son, that makes a difference.

    Maybe this chick is just mentally ill but I'll be darned if I see how that accounts for your bro going along with it. Borderlines are really manipulative and persuasive, maybe he is just sucked into her BS. The ones I've known wore thin pretty quickly though. They burn through friends and family, just use them up. People seem to wise up to them fairly soon, usually.

    I have a friend that went through similar crap in his family, with the stealing, neglected kids, kinda crazy focus on the brother's spouse. It took ages for them to realize what the deal was. Finally his mom found broken light bulbs that were scorched. I asked my bro...sure enough, that's how they smoke meth when they don't have a pipe.

    Hopefully I'm wrong. Meanwhile, keep your eyes open, ok? If they're up late and sleeping all day, weird eating habits, disappearing for sex for hours on end, more stealing, those are big red lights. Also, if it's meth, it changes people. It's entirely possible to go from an occasional potsmoker that won't take aspirin to a meth head, and it can happen fast.

    I hope they get jobs, move away and leave you guys in peace! In my experience, the biggest babies never do until somebody makes them do it. If she stole from my kid, I'd press charges, I think. She needs to hit some kind of bottom before she wrecks your life and your son's. Sounds like she's already wrecked your brother and your parents.

    Sorry for being all tough love, and if I sound like a know-it-all. I swear, I have so many decades behind me now, watching my brother do this stuff. I can hear in his voice when he's using even if I haven't seen him in months. It freaks him out entirely. He doesn't like me much of the time because I can read him too well. And your sister-in-law smells like a big old addict from here. I said the same thing about my friend's bro that I mentioned above, and sadly was completely right. I'd much rather be wrong because it's a tough road, being the sibling of an addict.

    Sigh. Good luck!

    Betheny

  5. #15
    No, not stealing stuff to buy pills, stealing to buy stuff becuase she doesn't work.

    "Maybe this chick is just mentally ill but I'll be darned if I see how that accounts for your bro going along with it. Borderlines are really manipulative and persuasive, maybe he is just sucked into her BS. The ones I've known wore thin pretty quickly though. They burn through friends and family, just use them up. People seem to wise up to them fairly soon, usually. "

    We have, believe me. But the big road block is the kids.
    My brother is simple. He allys was the one to get conned.
    heck once he dated a girl who would get paged-leave him wherever, then come back in a hour,saying she had to talk to a friend. Even when he figured out she was turning tricks on the side, he stayed with her for a year. she even moved in with a guy. I don't understand it, but he is a idiot when it comes to women.

    I can't prove she stole stuff.
    my eyes are allways open.
    seen meth addiction too, so I know what you mean.
    He's been a pot head my whole life, and is scared to death of anything stronger after a one time acid trip. I doubt he'll ever go stronger.
    they won't get jobs, i know this for a fact.
    he has never held a real one
    her last one was a fraudulent sounding "charity" selling trash bags for disabled vets. swears it was legit. HA.
    Deborah

  6. #16
    You cannot change the people in your household, but you can change you. Find a new place with your son and leave your brother, the g/f, their children and your Mom to their dysfunctional ways. A new lease and U-Haul can be your new, best friends.

  7. #17
    I agree ME.

    That house doesn't sound like a good environment for you or your son. I couldn't do it without bashing some skulls and your son doesn't need to see that. It sounds like he hears and sees too much already.
    T-5 incomplete

  8. #18
    True,all true guys. I have plans to do just that. Slowly, but it'll get done.
    Deborah

  9. #19
    well guys, here is my week:
    I drove my mom to the ER, she ended up having major surgery because scar tissue wrapped around her intestines,closing everthing off. For the past few days, I have been trying to keep up around the house,take care of my son, and go see her every day.
    My 'idiot' brother is here (upstairs 20hrs a day) with 18month old.
    His GF appears daily to bitch, bath her kids here (?) cook them food, and bum gas money to get the girls to school.
    So, the towels are all dirty, the clean dishes are on the table, stacked up, the sink is full of dirty ones (my son and I had take out last night)
    There are toys, clothes,ect everywhere on the floor.
    I need to wash sheets and clothes,but the washer is in the basement.
    someone got into the pasta, and i have spagetti all over the dining room and kitchen, coffee grounds on the stove and floor, and i guess their way to help out, they put my coffee up on the top shelf of the cabinet.
    Idiot is bitching he can't "do anything" since he is "babysitting" all the time.
    Breeder (his GF) is bitching that he needs to step up and take the other 3 kids to give her a 'break'
    I told her BLUNTLY that she doesn't need to tell me anything, it is for HER and HIM to figure out how to take care of thier children.
    I don't ask them for anything. Pride is a awful thing, but if they did anything for me, I'll hear about forever.
    I try my hardest to keep up around here, but it's hard,and I'm tired. I have work to get done by the 15th or some people will really be pissed off.
    I have casual friends who say 'if you need anything', but I say no, because it's embarrassing that they would come in and see all this.
    The BF is watching our kid so i can go to the hospital to see her, making sure we both eat, but he sucks at laundry-I do not want pink sheets.
    The other brother said he had a 'talk' withthe idiot, both I don't think its working. *sigh*
    Deborah

  10. #20
    Hope your mother recovers quickly!
    Moving stuff around the cabinets is something my daughter does. I laugh and say "Did CB(grandson) move my coffee cups again? i can't reach anything!" She took the hint easily and now there is always a cup on the coffee maker, ready and waiting.

    How about the breeder doing laundry? "I'll watch the brats, um, children for a moment if you can get a load in the washer?"

    Don't mention pink.. I did do that once before with my own work shirts
    Rick Brauer or just call me - Mr B

    http://www.riseadventures.org

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