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Thread: Meeting w/mom set for Wednesday, AHHHH

  1. #11
    I'm up for it, Becky. BTW, I'm Andy's girlfriend. I can understand a caring Mother, but she is way overboard. The whole "you're not trying hard enough" makes me cringe everytime I hear it.
    T-5 incomplete

  2. #12
    Extremely nice offer from Andy and RaeRae. If not this time, perhaps if your mom needs reminding in the future. I think meeting Mister 6 and a Half Foot Big Ol' Biker Man and realizing he couldn't will himself to walk might make her comprehend that what she is asking is beyond your power to deliver.

  3. #13
    You can call me Candy. Not hard to forget.. Andy and Candy.
    T-5 incomplete

  4. #14
    Andy and RaeRae are good people, Becky. Those two are waaaaaay kewl.

    This is just an idea. Perhaps this isn't the time for reinforcements in the meeting, but directly afterwards. Even if Andy and RaeRae are not in the meeting (it might be better to skip that so your Mom focuses on what the medical types say and not your CC friends), I bet Andy and RaeRae would meet you and your Mom afterwards. Could be a great way to diffuse, to force your Mom to at least have social manners with you after the meeting.

    Also, it would give your Mom a chance to meet other wheelers, specifically other SCIs.

    Most importantly, when you leave that meeting you'd have two people physically with you who understand, get it and are totally supportive.

    I'm just thinking outloud via keyboard again.

    Now that I've just volunteered Andy and RaeRae post-meeting ...

  5. #15
    Andy and Candy, that is very nice I will definately have to take you up on that offer. I think that the same day might be a bit of an overload for my mom. But I loved Betheny's idea about "if she needs reminding in the future". I also am trying to take advice from other posts and try to get through this "on my own", if that makes sense. Sort of like how when you were in third grade and the bully beat you up, you didn't want your parents to go to the principle because you knew that you would get beaten up worse the next time. I know a little drastic example but the idea is still the same. I will definately keep your offer in mind. Thanks so much!!!

    Becky,
    Chicago
    T8-9 according to latest scoring.......
    since 1/3/04

    I am the best at being me. No matter how that happens to be!!

  6. #16
    Becky

    It's great that you've taken such a rational approach to communicating.

    Just remember that you deal admirably with this shit every day, that makes you incredibly strong. What you've achieved so far is great so don't let that be taken away from you by misunderstanding.

    Enter and leave that meeting with your head up.

    Paul
    C5/6 incomplete

    "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

  7. #17
    Becky,

    Best of everything to you tomorrow and in the future! Be proud of who you are, and be proud of who you will be...

    Take care and God bless!

    Teena

  8. #18
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    connecticut
    Posts
    8,272
    Go for it Becky! I like the list idea. I'm glad you are working at settling this. I know it is a big step for you. I hope your mom can accept that she is asking something from you that isn;t an option.
    T7-8 since Feb 2005

  9. #19
    Don't be scared. Be strong and 'stand up' for yourself. Good luck!!!!!

  10. #20
    Well, the "ordeal" went as smoothly as it could go. We got there a little early and found out that my doc was running behind which made me super nervous since the therapist was supposed to have a patient at 11 so I thought that she wasn't going to be able to attend. It turned out that we got called back at a quarter to 11 so we had fifteen minutes to talk about the whole trial with the KAFO's before she had to leave. The next almost hour and a half was spent with my doc, my mom and myself. All I can say is that I feel so thankful for my doctor. He was able to put everything in a way that my mom didn't feel like she was being be-littled, which would have made it even harder then it was. He was able to make my mom be quiet long enough for me to say what I needed to say. Usually that is a big problem. I will have something that I need to say and she, my mom, just keeps talking like I am not even in mid sentence. I just have to thank everyone for their support and investment the last few months with everything. I know I have been annoying. I know that there is still a long way to go but I think if I ever need to schedule something like this again, my doc will have no problem with it. And more importantely, I won't feel stupid asking for one.

    Becky,
    Chicago
    T8-9 according to latest scoring.......
    since 1/3/04

    I am the best at being me. No matter how that happens to be!!

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