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Thread: Was I Wrong?

  1. #1

    Was I Wrong?

    I went to visit my mom today. She lives in elderly housing. The parking for visitors there is very limited (abt 25 spaces for a 40 unit facility). There is one handicapped slot, but it has no hash marks and is not big enough for me to open my door and pull my chair out without hitting the car beside me. I doubt I would even be able to open the door for that matter, without hitting the other car. I have never had the opportunity to try it because that slot is ALWAYS taken. So, this brings me to my problem. Because the HP slot was taken and about 8 empty regular slots were open, I double parked to make sure I would be able to get back in my car when I left. A couple hours later, a man came to the door and asked, "who owns the blue car out in the parking lot," pointing to my car as he spoke. I told him it was my car, and he started to yell at me and cussing, explaining that I had no right to double park like that. Shocked, I tried to explain about how I need more room to get in and out of my car. Before I could even finish, he yelled "then you shouldn't be driving!" At this point, my blood started to boil. I wanted to yell back at him, but well, he was an able-bodied male, an I'm a disabled female. I was, I hate to admit it, but very afraid. So, I kept my anger to myself and let him rant on, and politely listened. Finally, he walked away, still cursing and screaming as he disappeared around to the side of the building, where I believe he lives. After he left, I was thinking to myself, am I wrong? Technically, I was double parked, that is wrong, but I also had a very good reason for doing it. Either way, I don't think that man had the right to speak to me that way.
    So, was I right or wrong? And What should I do, if anything?

  2. #2
    Senior Member Broknwing's Avatar
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    nah, you weren't wrong...you parked in such a way necesary to guarantee that you could enter your car....The complex was actually wrong by not having a proper disabled parking space...The guy was just an ass...don't let him, or others like him intimidate you...stand up for yourself & to jerks like that..
    'Chelle
    L-1 inc 11/24/03

    "My Give-a-Damn's Busted"......

  3. #3
    He was an ass. I have to park that way sometimes even tho' I don't like to. I am always afraid of someone keying my van and not knowing why I did it. Just reread where you listed only 25 total spots.
    Last edited by 2jazzyjeff; 10-07-2007 at 02:47 AM.





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  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Whiskers
    I tried to explain about how I need more room to get in and out of my car. Before I could even finish, he yelled "then you shouldn't be driving!" At this point, my blood started to boil. I wanted to yell back at him, but well, he was an able-bodied male, an I'm a disabled female. I was, I hate to admit it, but very afraid. So, I kept my anger to myself and let him rant on, and politely listened. Finally, he walked away, still cursing and screaming as he disappeared around to the side of the building, where I believe he lives. After he left, I was thinking to myself, am I wrong?
    Fuck him. Nobody has the right to scream at you over a freakin' parking space. That being said, I would have told him so. You could have remained calm and not raised your voice, but continued to explain to him why you parked the way you did. Why be so scared? That's no way to go through life. For the future, you may want to approach the housing association (or whomever is appropriate) to suggest that the next time they slurry and paint their parking lot, they redo the handicap parking space to make it actually functional (and to meet ADA?). In the meantime, don't sweat this. All you did was park your car in a way that allowed you to enter and exit safely so you could visit your mom. Nothing wrong with that.

    C.

  5. #5
    Senior Member zilnh's Avatar
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    I think you did the right thing by not engaging with him. People who get irate are not rational. I suggest getting a taser. But, maybe you could use the anger to create change. I don't know if you have one of the specialized vans, but if not, demanding Valet service from the building? Or additional parking?

    He had no right to speak to you like that. But responding, would have just escalated the situation. If at all possible, consider finding out which vehicle is his and cover it with take out menu's every time you visit. It would be a community service, that doesn't do damage to his vehicle.

  6. #6
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    Unhappy

    You did nothing wrong, and for what it is worth the guy would have made me fearful too. He is ignorant, plain and simple, as demonstrated by his ridiculous rebuttal of "then you shouldn't be driving." I often have to park at weird angles or sometimes take a couple of spots diagnonally to be able to get out of my van. Even though it has a "please don't park withing 8 ft, wheelchair ramp" sticker on the door that has the ramp every so often some idiot decides to chew me out for taking too much space. It pretty much ruins my day and makes me think that humanity is nearly non-existent, and then someone will come along and ask me if I could use some help, restoring the belief that not everyone is an idiot. I might speak to whoever owns or manages the housing your mom is in about your need to take up two spaces, but aside from that just try to write this obnoxious human off......easier said than done, I know.

  7. #7
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    Concerning the old man who yelled at you (I'm assuming he's old), don't sweat it to much. Old people can feel very possessive about their surroundings. Here in Florida we get it all the time. Our priest at the church we attend (mostly elderly) actually scoulded any people who were claiming a spot on a perticular pew as "their seat." One such case resulted in a family leaving our parish out of embarrassment and disgust.

    I usually find an end spot and then park as far to one side as I can to leave room for my door and chair.

  8. #8
    Hey Whiskers, under the circumstances, you were not wrong. I probably would have ended up yelling back at him, which would'nt have solved anything, but anytime one feels threatened by another's anger, the way you handled it was just fine.

    I think I would have gone to the office, I'm assuming there is someone there in charge, informed them how and why I parked the way I did and as long as the parking situation stays as it is, I'd be parking the same way in the future to be able to visit my mother.

    I assume he was an elderly resident or visitor, and shame on him.

  9. #9
    i would also be afraid to talk back! but of course u weren't wrong parking like that. i hope u had a pleasant visit otherwise. i would be a little rattled

  10. #10
    Senior Member Foolish Old's Avatar
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    Two observations...

    1. Always carry a fully loaded large caliber handgun.

    2. (This assumes that the yelling man was elderly) - According to movies I have seen (must be true, right?), Eskimos that are too old to be useful (this age varies with individual) are sent into the wilderness to perish from exposure to the elements. Seems like a good idea for the self appointed mad traffic warden.
    Foolish

    "We have met the enemy and he is us."-POGO.

    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it."~Edgar Allan Poe

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