First, for anyone who doesn't know, I have the SCI, my SO was injured with me, he's blind and has a significant TBI. I am his primary caregiver. Currently I'm nursing another fracture and a nasty little pressure sore on my backside that has me on complete bedrest for the next couple of weeks.

When I went to the ER, his guardian came by to check on him and realized that he hadn't bathed or brushed his teeth in a long time (it's a continual issue due to his head injury). Since I am unable to properly care for him right now, his guardian decided to place him in an assisted living facility for a while. I didn't argue. His bag was packed in 15 minutes.

He doesn't try to help out at home or to improve his self-care skills. He was here with me for 3 days after I was hurt. Even though I explained how important it was that I stayed on my side and how dangerous a pressure sore could be, he still nagged until I got up to make dinner. There's no reason why he can't be more independent according to his OT.

I'm sad and embarrassed to say, I'm relieved that he's gone right now and I'm not eager to heal because he'll come back home and we'll end up right back where we were when I got hurt.

How do you set those boundaries so that he's as independent as he can be? At what point is it ok to say "I can't do this any more?" If I don't care for him, no one else will. He'll have to go to a facility. If I do continue to care for him, I sacrifice my own health and well-being. What to do?