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Thread: Murderball: John Mayer says...

  1. #51
    Senior Member Foolish Old's Avatar
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    Buck & Tiger,

    Before somebody turns this thread into juvenile name calling with little interesting content - I thank you both for making strong but focused posts explaining (examining? exploring?) your feelings on this topic. People tell me that it's just the way of the Internet, but far too often I see interesting threads deteriorate into bullshit bickering. Again, thanks for staying on topic.

    In fact, despite the emotional content in most of the posts, they have all pretty much been focused. Thanks to all.
    Last edited by Foolish Old; 11-18-2006 at 03:20 AM.
    Foolish

    "We have met the enemy and he is us."-POGO.

    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it."~Edgar Allan Poe

    "Dream big, you might never wake up!"- Snoop Dogg

  2. #52
    Quote Originally Posted by Foolish Old
    I thank you both for making strong but focused posts explaining (examining? exploring?)...
    I like that.

    ...your feelings on this topic. People tell me that it's just the way of the Internet, but far too often I see interesting threads deteriorate into bullshit bickering. Again, thanks for staying on topic.
    The internet can be a PITA.

    Thank you for valuing civility.

    C.

  3. #53
    Quote Originally Posted by Foolish Old
    Buck & Tiger,

    Before somebody turns this thread into juvenile name calling with little interesting content - I thank you both for making strong but focused posts explaining (examining? exploring?) your feelings on this topic. People tell me that it's just the way of the Internet, but far too often I see interesting threads deteriorate into bullshit bickering. Again, thanks for staying on topic.

    In fact, despite the emotional content in most of the posts, they have all pretty much been focused. Thanks to all.
    Thank you.

    Tiger and I like to joust from time to time. But it's generally good
    conversation.

  4. #54
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    After reading some more about Mark Zupan last night.....

    Here is my take on what may have made him say "I am glad my injury happened". He was injured because he got drunk at a bar and climbed into a friends pickup truck bed and passed out. The friend was driving drunk at the wheel and crashed without ever knowing Mark was back there. He spent several hours clinging to a branch before a motorist spotted him.

    There was alcohol involving my accident as well. It was my "wake up" call to look at where my life was heading. I dont wish this accident on anyone but as with Mark, the same would have not happened if I had not been drinking and living stupid. Again this is my views on my own accident not anyone elses. I can fully understand everyone elses reasons for feeling the way they do and I hope that I can help you understand my feelings. I feel that possibly if things had not turned out how they did....who else would have had to suffer if I had stupidly got into another car on a different night. It all goes back to each individuals choice to view their own circumstances and learn from them. I realize that this may be impossible for those whose accidents were caused by anything other than their own fault. Who knows, if my accident would have happened differently maybe I would feel differently.

    It all goes back to purpose. I believe there are people put here on earth to do certain things such as advocacy, care, cure, and whatever else. What ever you feel your purpose is in life then it is yours to act upon. If Einstein had not had a passion for science/electronics and a purpose in life...Would we all still be sitting in the dark?

    If we dont have a passion/purpose to change, how will anything ever change. If scientists dont feel they have a purpose for studying the stem cells and a passion for doing the work they do, how will we ever have a cure?

    Mark Zupan was in college on a soccor scholarship if the website I read is correct so he had always had a passion for sports and being the best at sports. Maybe that accident was a wake up call for him to change his life in regards to living dangerously and maybe that was why he made that statement....I guess we will have to read the book to find out. I think he has chosen to still live his passion regardless of his injury and I think that is why his life seems so much better than some of the rest of us can understand. I am quite passionate about staying out of the limelight...LOL Being famous is obviously not for me....LOL I do want a cure but feel my purpose is working behind the scenes!!!!

    Over all I would much rather have my injury than the alternative of death and I was very close to death by the time I got to the hospital.

    I hope this makes sense...Sometimes we just all type things that come out wrong....I am guilty!!!!! It is also hard for me to type a response without showing some sort of emotion....it is just the way I am made...LOL

    I am going to read the book.....to see if it gives me some insight to the way he is thinking.
    Last edited by darkeyed_daisy; 11-18-2006 at 02:34 PM.
    T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

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  5. #55
    Senior Member Scorpion's Avatar
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    The Gist

    lilsis and John Smith - Thank you for your posts. I think you both got the gist of what I was saying in my original post in this thread, and I especially see that in lilsis' post. It's interesting that you're both AB and seem to get it more than all the crips posting here. John, your email that you quoted from reminded me of some of my own father's thoughts and writings regarding my SCI and my rehab days.
    Last edited by Scorpion; 11-18-2006 at 06:19 PM.

  6. #56
    Senior Member Scorpion's Avatar
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    For the record...

    I don't think anyone with an SCI is obligated to advocate for SCI research. I think we should all choose our words carefully and think of the big picture and others with SCI (and those with other disabilities) if given a platform where a lot of people can hear us, but I don't think people should "push" something they don't believe in or don't feel passionate about. I've never had a problem with Hockenberry, and I don't really have a problem with Zupan (though he hasn't impressed me from the interviews I've seen of him). I don't believe either really hurts the cause of an SCI cure, even if they could use more tact and thoughtfulness in the things they say publicly.

    I'd try to explain my original post further, but I really think it was pretty clear, especially if someone reading it is even a little familiar with my views on all this care vs. cure bullshit.
    Last edited by Scorpion; 11-18-2006 at 06:18 PM.

  7. #57
    Quote Originally Posted by JDR
    However, if and when the "cure" does come, Zupan won't be the last quad left on this earth. I can promise you that.
    LOL, that's the truth....These guys are all full of it...Like Jeff said, his 15 minutes will be over soon and he'll slip back in to obscurity....


  8. #58
    Quote Originally Posted by jayday9
    LOL, that's the truth....These guys are all full of it...Like Jeff said, his 15 minutes will be over soon and he'll slip back in to obscurity....
    uh, I doubt it
    sounds like a bunch of angry crips in this thread.
    oh poor me.

  9. #59
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    imho anyone who can say honestly they wouldn't want to not have had their SCI is a fucking moron and a liar imho.

    can u learn important lessons from it, get a real view on the world and find inner strength u didn't know u had post-sci? sure.... but give me a fucking break, i wouldn't change it, yah right, that bullshit. If there were a pill he could pop that would make him walk he'd swallow it as fast as the rest.

    SCI is a double edged sword... u don't want sympathy and u don't want people to focus on your SCI so u say i'm normal, accept me as me, my lifes not that bad..... yet in the next breath we all stay we need a cure, support stem cell research, i need to walk again cause i'm wasting my life

    its lose-lose in the non-sci public except for those really educated or close to sci that understand that double edge sword.... joe & jane on the street are never gonna get it, gpnna look at u as a charity if u want a cure, or gonna look at sci as nothing but "sitting down" if u don't

  10. #60
    Quote Originally Posted by RJC
    imho anyone who can say honestly they wouldn't want to not have had their SCI is a fucking moron and a liar imho.
    Opinion duly noted.

    If there were a pill he could pop that would make him walk he'd swallow it as fast as the rest.
    If I could take a pill that would instantly cure me, with no possible side effects, that wouldn't affect anything else about my life, then yes, I would take it. However, that's a silly fantasy. Won't happen that way. In reality, there will be work involved and risk. It will take time and could involve more pain. This talk of refusing an instant cure is specious. Address the reality and refute people's claims if you can, but this is silly.

    SCI is a double edged sword
    I agree with that much, but not the detail you go into.

    u don't want sympathy and u don't want people to focus on your SCI so u say i'm normal, accept me as me, my lifes not that bad.....
    I would never claim that I'm normal as that is just untrue. A broken back isn't normal. Lack of bladder control isn't normal. Using a wheelchair isn't normal.

    That last part is close to what I tell people though. My life isn't as bad as some people assume it is. I have a job, a wonderful husband, loving family and I race cars for the fun of it.

    yet in the next breath we all stay we need a cure, support stem cell research, i need to walk again cause i'm wasting my life
    No. Just no. My injury hasn't wasted my life. There have been periods when it felt like some time was wasted, but not my life as a whole. Not by far. I would never, EVER want anyone to believe that about me in order to further a cure. The reality of the pain and frustration and inconvenience and medical complications that come with SCI are enough to warrant sympathy.

    its lose-lose in the non-sci public except for those really educated or close to sci that understand that double edge sword.... joe & jane on the street are never gonna get it, gpnna look at u as a charity if u want a cure, or gonna look at sci as nothing but "sitting down" if u don't
    That hasn't been my experience at all. I've found that most people that I have even a short conversation with about SCI go away with a basic understanding of the good and the bad.

    And it's ridiculous to state that we have to make ourselves look wholly pathetic in order to convince people to contribute to medical research. You don't have to be dying for people to think that your condition is sucky and you'd be better off without it. For instance, diabetics don't have the problem in this area that you think people with SCI do.

    C.

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