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Thread: ready to give up from the pain.

  1. #151
    Senior Member reedyd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by quadvet
    I read some of these posts and felt compelled and qualified to post.

    I kilt myself 3 times, wasn't difficult, no worse than being conscious when I broke my neck and had to take that last deep breath -- of water. The last time was easiest because there were no meds, go figure. Just drove my chair over a cliff, big deal. Ironically, my docs took notice and finally listened to me. And no, it was not a cry for help as most would say. They kind of patched up the situation, making it more livable, but boy do they owe me!

    But that's not my point. We have dysesthetic pain, and any real pain causes this to be exasperated many times over (arse digging, catheters including superpubic, constipation & laxatives, etc., etc.). Just a light touch on the leg is enough to make me scream.

    So, you are in real pain and end up taking meds for it, meds that have their own side effects, some unique to the individual, constipation almost universal. Many will say quit taking drugs altogether, but we know that's not possible.

    The biggest move I made to relieve pain is a colostomy and urostomy. The dysesthetic pain persists, but it is not exasperated by arse digging and catheters anymore.

    I don't have to take pain meds to survive that shit anymore, either, so constipation and laxative problems aren't so much a problem if my watch my diet, eat more fruit than anything.

    The ostomy's work good if placed properly, there is no such thing as "bowel care" anymore!, no wrenching catheter & catheter changing! I used to bleed and have AD during both procedures, so bad it took nifedipine, so you see, I'm not bullshittting.

    Think about doing it; many of my buddies at the VA have opted for ostomy's.

    Best of all, my caregiver just loves how much easier it is. I think that's what scares people away from it; the fear of maintenance... that and the horrible surgical procedure, but it was worth it for me.

    The most impressive thing anyone ever said to me about suicide was: "Do you want to die?". No, I don't, so won't go down without a fight!

    Good luck, Matt
    I am a c 5/6 quad. I had a bone infection in my back [ osteomylitus ]
    it left me with a feeking like a ball of fire in my back or akin to a knife sticking in it.
    They told me a bladder infection may have traveled from my bladder up into my back. That was when I had a SP catheter. Was averaging a bladder infection every 3 or 4 months.
    I got me a urostomy last year. It was one of the best choices I've made in a while. I am having far less trouble with this.

    Good Luck to All

  2. #152
    Quote Originally Posted by reedyd
    I got me a urostomy last year. It was one of the best choices I've made in a while. I am having far less trouble with this.

    Good Luck to All

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