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Thread: They're Made Out Of Meat

  1. #1

    They're Made Out Of Meat

    Very funny.

    http://www.terrybisson.com/meat.html
    THEY'RE MADE OUT OF MEAT

    by Terry Bisson

    "They're made out of meat."

    "Meat?"

    "Meat. They're made out of meat."

    "Meat?"

    "There's no doubt about it. We picked up several from different parts of the planet, took them aboard our recon vessels, and probed them all the way through. They're completely meat."

    "That's impossible. What about the radio signals? The messages to the stars?"

    "They use the radio waves to talk, but the signals don't come from them. The signals come from machines."

    "So who made the machines? That's who we want to contact."

    "They made the machines. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Meat made the machines."

    "That's ridiculous. How can meat make a machine? You're asking me to believe in sentient meat."

    "I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. These creatures are the only sentient race in that sector and they're made out of meat."

    "Maybe they're like the orfolei. You know, a carbon-based intelligence that goes through a meat stage."

    "Nope. They're born meat and they die meat. We studied them for several of their life spans, which didn't take long. Do you have any idea what's the life span of meat?"

    "Spare me. Okay, maybe they're only part meat. You know, like the weddilei. A meat head with an electron plasma brain inside."

    "Nope. We thought of that, since they do have meat heads, like the weddilei. But I told you, we probed them. They're meat all the way through."

    "No brain?"

    "Oh, there's a brain all right. It's just that the brain is made out of meat! That's what I've been trying to tell you."

    "So ... what does the thinking?"

    "You're not understanding, are you? You're refusing to deal with what I'm telling you. The brain does the thinking. The meat."

    "Thinking meat! You're asking me to believe in thinking meat!"

    <much more>

  2. #2
    "A dream to meat! How strangely appropriate, that we should be meat's dream."
    Hillarious!!! I don't know if I'll ever think of myself the same way again!

  3. #3
    hee hee...reminds me of the twilight zone episode..." to serve man."

    http://members.cox.net/kaiotea/serveman.htm
    Last edited by cass; 08-30-2006 at 04:49 AM.

  4. #4
    Senior Member queen's Avatar
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    Anty is unable to get to her computer and wanted me to ask
    just What kinda' tea ya drinkin there in China, Dr. Wise or you
    taken that lithium stuff that's suppose to go to the patients.
    HAHAHA...Queen for Anty...and HUGS HUGS HUGS from Anty LOL
    Your life is what you make it, and only you have that choice!

  5. #5
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    Good one and my doc is right; he says each of us basically are just some food processing plants (factories).

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leif
    Good one and my doc is right; he says each of us basically are just some food processing plants (factories).
    speak for yourself, my body runs much better on CnH2n+1OH

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by IanTPoulter
    speak for yourself, my body runs much better on CnH2n+1OH
    Right, but that’s a necessary part of the food assortment isn’t it? It helps processing fatty food in the food plant.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leif
    Right, but that’s a necessary part of the food assortment isn’t it? It helps processing fatty food in the food plant.
    I heard theres a direct correlation to the amount of whale and reindeer meat consumed.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Foolish Old's Avatar
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    Meatheads!
    Foolish

    "We have met the enemy and he is us."-POGO.

    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it."~Edgar Allan Poe

    "Dream big, you might never wake up!"- Snoop Dogg

  10. #10
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    Good one. lol

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