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Thread: melting down FAST

  1. #1

    melting down FAST

    Right now I can hardly breathe, constant crying, May 20 will be one year since oldest son attempted suicide and resulted in T4 complete injury. Came home with stage 5 bedsore, got it well in record time of 6 mos. Did not find out that "jump" from window was attempted suicide for months! I have gone from size 14 to size 2 & 4 went to dr. and he rx'd Welbutrin, felt awful and quit taking it. Now I am on verapamil for Bp-never been a problem before. Now the date is approaching and I am SO ANGRY!!!! I look at my son and resent what he decided for this part of my life! He also began using street drug K-4. I can't just throw him out, in our state there is NO help! I don't waste alot of time on WHY but I do remember my dreams for age 50 and I miss not being able to get there, no support group in b'ham al and I CAN'T stop CRYING! HELP my heart is breaking!

  2. #2
    Easy now. Breathe!

    I have no advice other than this-take care of yourself. You need a way past the anger. The suicide attempt was not a rational act. You have the right to your life. At t4, with the bedsore healed, your son can make it.

  3. #3

    Keep trying

    Betheny is right, you have to try to keep going with YOUR life as well. Have you seen a therapist or psychiatrist? If you decide that medication is something you would like to try, there are many others besides Wellbutrin. I have problems with depression/anxiety and some of the drugs make it worse, however there are many others that helped! Don't give up on that route if you truly think you need it. Also, make sure you have a professional therapist to talk things out with. That helps tremendously! Also, daily exercise - if you are able - is a real mood elevator! Give it a try

  4. #4
    Please make it. My son also sci. I want you to keep posting here. My son also street druged. Mothers day is Sunday. I know your son needs you. Please if you aren't able to seek a psychiatrist at this time, this web site can help you. They helped me and I am not Paralyzed. The members write to you and share. They encourage and enlighten. Please give them a chance to help you. xoxo Patti

  5. #5

    Your anger is very understandable. Having to live a different life due to the reckless actions of others. I am there with you, I dreamed of happy 40s, children raised, my dream job obtained, only to have a 16 year old crush my body and my dreams. But there has to be a way past the anger, and you certainly need professional help for the depression. Medication works but you have to find the right one.
    If your son attempted suicide, he was most likely sick himself and he needed and needs all the help he can get. But at T4, there is no reason why you canĀ“t live at least some of your dreams for your 50s, because he can be independent with the right rehab.

  6. #6
    Rebus - You came to the right place for advice and encouragement. Check your private message box.
    - Richard

  7. #7
    Rebus, How did you fare Mothers day? Thinking of you and your son.

  8. #8
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Avon, IN USA

    Your weight loss sounds scary. Have you had your thyroid checked?. Ask your doc. for a complete blood count panel. It is amazing how stress can take a toll on our body, mind, and spirit. Hang in there and try to take care of you too!

  9. #9
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Orange, Texas

    Smile Husband is T-4 Complete

    My husband was in a motorcycle accident 5 years ago and he was a very active person before that. Yes it will definitly change both you and your sons life tremendously. but you have to stay positive for him--yes he did make a mistake but I would be grateful he didn't die...he's very lucky..I know it's stressful and your life seems like a drama unfolding something new everyday--and it will be like that for a while--but you have to get control of yourself so that you can help him in the long run also--i know it's hard and i know there are all kinds of emotions and feelings to go with everything---believe me i'm on paxil cause i was very overwhelmed also--you'll be alright--and he willl be more independant than you think--believe me my husband sometimes doesn't want my help for anything..

  10. #10
    Rebus, it's been a week since your post r u alright?

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