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Thread: suicide

  1. #221
    Quote Originally Posted by alan View Post
    I wouldn't ride out in front of a bus or car, if I ever reached the point where I could overcome everything that would keep me from committing suicide. I wouldn't do that to the innocent driver of the vehicle, and besides, there's no guarantee that being hit by a bus or car will provide the desired result to a person seeking to be killed in that manner, rather than making their condition worse. Same reason rolling oneself down stairs is not the best idea.
    My thoughts exactly. What a terrible thing to do to some poor stranger. And what if they swerved to avoid you and ended up hurting themselves or others? Whoever was looking after you would also get blamed. After a half lifetime of fighting to breathe, the drowning option isn't terribly attractive either. Hello my little koi! Ironically, the easiest way to go as a high quad would be to do nothing. Just stop with all the things you do on a regular basis just to maintain life. Weight shifts. Meds. Suction. Again, not a fun prospect, but if things really do become intolerable one day, I find it a comfort to have at least some option.

  2. #222
    James, lots of interesting reading. Too much for me to comment on it all. You touched on important areas - taking loved ones to a clinic miles away and them travelling home without you and the impact on whoever finds you or you chose to involve if you were so desperate to drive in front of a truck or train and you have a lot of things to give consideration to as well as your own mental battle. I've been through all of this and still have the dilemma of my wife driving me across Europe, with me whilst I undergo examination to assess mental capacity and degree of suffering, watch me die then have a funeral in Switzerland and drive my ashes home or drive home whilst my body is air transported and we have a funeral at home.

    So many factors to consider on top of your own issues but if you do no-one can say you've been "selfish" by ending your life.

    I was weak last year, have now sorted it after discussion with my doctor and nurse team, I've got morphine based sedatives for when it gets too much to handle, hopefully they can be administered quickly and I won't back away again. Been close to death when I had my accident, heart and breathing stopped but "luckily" the next cyclists along were 3 doctors who kept me alive for 30 minutes until the air ambulance arrived. No memories, no white lights just nothingness.

    Another pertinent point on not breathing and brain death, that is way more scary than death. My DNR and advance directives both have clauses preventing reconnecting the vent if it has detached and no-one knows for how long. The care home I was imprisoned in had a number of patients who had suffered that and I couldn't let my family go through what their families did, visiting once a week, sat at their bedside with no communication. Horrendous to watch. Living vented you have that fear permanently, push on pipes can easily detach, vents stop working, carer gone to toilet and unable to hear vent alarm. Once again another thing that if you haven't experienced you won't fully understand what it feels like. It happened once in the care home, pipe blew off, room door closed alarm sounding but no-one could hear. I lay there thinking "is this how it ends in a shitty care home with useless staff" then the cleaner opened the door and heard the alarm and rushed to find someone to help. I've never been in a room with a closed door since then!

    I doubt that I can put into words all of the events that made the decision to die easier to make I've just got to wait for the right opportunity to be able to do it at home with family and friends there if they want to be.

  3. #223
    For me! The thing that keeps me from depression is not thinking about what I am missing out of if sci never happen. Just focus on something that you can do. Dwelling on the past will only make things worse.

  4. #224
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    ((Hey Rainman)) How did you make out from the hurricane?
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

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  5. #225
    Quote Originally Posted by TheRainman View Post
    For me! The thing that keeps me from depression is not thinking about what I am missing out of if sci never happen. Just focus on something that you can do. Dwelling on the past will only make things worse.
    I find thinking about the future far worse than the past but each to their own we have few choices to end it.

  6. #226
    Quote Originally Posted by lynnifer View Post
    ((Hey Rainman)) How did you make out from the hurricane?
    I lost electricity for six days, And it was hot. Lost ten singles so i'm going to replace the roof soon.

    But the one thing you gain going through that is. How much you over look everything that you take for granted. Like air conditioning, tv and a light switch.

  7. #227
    Quote Originally Posted by Cripply View Post
    how long post-injury do suicidal thoughts stop?
    It seems you are still having it! . life is full of challenges dude. Even those who are physically fit are depressed for various other reasons.

    we should not lose hope as we are living in the most technologically advanced era . Even if the stem cells therapy does not show its desired results, we would soon all be walking through wearing exo-skeleton suites.

    Be motivated and read this :

    Wheel chair is a symbol of strength , not weakness
    Quadriplegic c6 complete.

    Bsc(HONS) Applied Physics / Msc Electronics from University of Karachi. Currently doing Mphil in AI/Robotics from IBA karachi.

    Physics / Maths high school instructor. Part time Web developer/ blogger . Have keen interest in Astronomy / physics/ World politics / Economics.

    Visit where people suffering from SCI share articles about post spinal cord injury life based on research and personal experiences

  8. #228
    Quote Originally Posted by TheRainman View Post

    But the one thing you gain going through that is. How much you over look everything that you take for granted. Like air conditioning, tv and a light switch.
    I get moved to hospital if we lose power for more than 8 hours, vents, air mattress and hospital bed are useless without power, bought a 7.5kw generator to avoid the being stuck in hospital experience. Sorry, slightly off topic.

  9. #229
    Quote Originally Posted by fahad283 View Post
    Wheel chair is a symbol of strength , not weakness
    Sometimes I am still flabbergasted by some of the things that people conclude or resort to in their “coping”, in some cases it has made me want to die just to not be associated with such thinking (I pray to God that I will never come to such a delusional conclusion when I can’t Even accomplish the most mundane and simplistic of tasks, if I fall over I lay there like a fish out of water! And I’m supposed to consider the thing that locks me in place and moves my broken athrophied Useless body around a symbol of strength, The thing can’t even get up a curb more than 6 inches! My God)... This was especially true with the reaction after that movie me before you. I was infuriated and so repulsed I just couldn’t believe it. But as I’ve said on here many times the longer you live like this the more you become accustom to it, I’ve left a psychiatrist speechless presenting my opinion that it is no different than Stockholm syndrome or institutionalization... The only difference With this case is such a delusional state is encouraged because modern medicine cannot do anything different for us. And then I say imagine if we had a cure, and I said “no I’m going to show my true strength, I’m going to remain a quadriplegic let my body wither away, let people dress me, Carry me, help me shit and piss, bathe me, Clean me up when I shit myself, wear diapers, etc” just imagine the reaction people would have they would be repulsed if there was another option, they wouldn’t say I was strong, they would be disgusted in my decision it would be the Antithesis of strength and all it Would take was for there to be another option available.
    Last edited by JamesMcM; 11-27-2017 at 07:35 AM.

  10. #230
    Quote Originally Posted by mrb View Post
    And that is the problem, I can use Tor to search the dark web, find someone selling sodium nxxxxxxxx, order it from China, it gets delivered and then I need someone's help which immediately puts them at risk of prosecution. I can't even open the package never mind mix a cocktail of it and an anti nausea drug to drink it. Not that I have given it much thought or begged my wife to do it and people really think that they understand our limitations.
    And this is why people who CRY about being a para can kiss my fucking ass !!! I am a t6 complete and if I could, I would rather give quads what I HAVE then me myself walk again..... Can't imagine. So to the poor me t4 or lower that "think" about suicide shove a gun in your mouth and pull the trigger !!!! Done deal.....sorry, suicide is a bad subject for me.

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