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Thread: Walking quad humor

  1. #1

    Walking quad humor

    Okay, I found this from a MS site, but I modified it, and I thought it could apply to us walking quads who are dealing with people who don't understand what our life is like:

    The WALKING QUAD EMPATHY KIT contains everything you need to simulate the effects of living with your SCI.
    Each kit comes with the following:

    1 pr. 10 lb wrist weights
    1 pr. 15 lb thigh weights
    1 pr. 20 lb ankle weights
    1 pr. extra thick stiff leather gloves
    1 lb sand
    1 pr. extra thick pant legs
    1 wide belt
    1 tens unit
    bungee cord assortment (comes in choice of colors)
    1 sit and spin toy
    1 bottle of Jack Daniels
    1 remote controlled .5 liter water bag complete with drip tube.
    DIRECTIONS
    DEPENDING ON YOUR CONDITION, YOU CAN USE ANY OR ALL ITEMS IN THIS KIT.
    FOLLOWING ARE "APPLICATION SUGGESTIONS" FOR FAMILY MEMBER, FRIEND OR CAREGIVER TO EXPERIENCE SCI.
    #1 PAINFUL HEAVY LEGS: SIMPLY APPLY TIGHTLY TO PARTNER 20LB ANKLE WEIGHTS
    15LB THIGH WEIGHTS
    #2 LOSS OF FEELING/DEXTERITY IN HANDS: PUT ON EXTRA THICK STIFF LEATHER GLOVES.
    #3 LOSS OF FEELING IN FEET AND/OR LEGS: PUT ON EXTRA THICK PANT LEGS, AND SAND IN BOTTOM OF SHOES.
    #4 TINGLING/PARATHESIAS: APPLY "TENS" UNIT ELECTRODES TO PARTNERS SKIN AND TURN ON TO DESIRED INTENSITY. (recharge daily)
    #5 TROUBLE LIFTING ARMS: SIMPLY APPLY 10 LB WRIST WEIGHTS TO PARTNER.
    #6 SPACTICITY: HOOK BUNGEE CORDS TO REAR BELT LOOPS AND REAR PANT LEG CUFFS,
    FOR ARMS HOOK BUNGEE CORDS TO SHIRT COLLAR AND CUFFS ON SHIRT SLEEVES.
    #7 BALANCE AND WALKING PROBLEMS: WHILE PARTNER DRINKS JACK DANIELS, HAVE HIM/HER RIDE SIT AND SPIN FOR 30 MINUTES, NOW HAVE THEM TRY WALKING THROUGH A CROWDED MALL!
    #8 URGENTLY NEED TO PEE!: HAVE PARTNER PUT .5 LITER REMOTE CONTROL WATER BAG AND DRIP
    TUBE IN THEIR PANTS, POINT OUT 2 REST ROOMS IN THE CROWDED MALL, TELL THEM THEY HAVE 30
    SECONDS BEFORE YOU ACTIVATE THE WATER BAG (by remote control) TO GET TO A RESTROOM!
    To make this effective, partner IS UNABLE remove any item for at least 24hrs and must simulate a normal day.
    AFTER THIS, THEY MAY WONDER HOW YOU MANAGE TO KEEP YOUR SANITY!

  2. #2
    I LOVE THIS!

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