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Thread: Naughty caregiver ... or not

  1. #61
    Quote Originally Posted by felieh
    So this has been bugging me for a couple of weeks now and my GF is of no help as she thinks I'm making too much of it.

    A few weeks ago, I hired this Vietnamese guy to come in the morning and help me get ready for work. He's 33, speaks decent English and is very respectful with good manners. My routine every morning first involves him catheterizing me followed by a light sponge bath in bed of my lower extremities, my pubic, penis and the area between my legs. I shower twice a week and don't sweat, so I'm really clean, believe me.

    The problem I have is that when he's doing the sponge bath, he works my penis so much that I get a raging hard on. Now, I know that he's a neat freak (usually a good thing, right) but not knowing about this guy's sexual orientation, I wonder if he does this on purpose or what. None of my previous caregivers ever gave me a hard on with their work down there.

    I'm stuck as to what to say or do. I don't want to embarrass the guy as he's been real good and thorough. I know part of the problem involves me as I can get it up in a hurry (c-6 quad). I'd hate to accuse someone falsely and lose a good caregiver. Everyone knows how hard it is to find a good one these days but to put it bluntly, and I've told my GF this just to tease her, he gives me a hard on more frequently than she does.

    HELP! Am I being homophobic?
    You could always just ask if he's gay...that shouldnt be to awkward

    Ya thats a real pickle ya got there man.I remember when i was in the hospital and my first 2yrs out,i had health aides scrubbin up my junk..some gave me a hard on and some didnt,with a reflex erection just dont know what will bring it on.It could just be his style,the force he uses..is he scrubbin under foreskin? or maybe thats N/A but if he is,then it dont take much.Ive got spontaneous wood poppin up all day long oneday,nothin the next...

    It could just be anything,but like i said you could ask ''hey man,ya married..got a girlfriend..wanna go catch a peeler..think my GF's goodlookin..think my buddys goodlookin..do you find me attractive''..etc just to see if you can catch a vibe..

  2. #62
    Quote Originally Posted by Lewis
    I don't like a finger up my ass but some things have to be done.
    Agreed, but you're missing the point. According to function exhibited by *most* C6 quads (myself included) this guy likely doesn't NEED someone else scrubbing his junk.

  3. #63
    Quote Originally Posted by chick
    Is not dignity also a thing of individual and personal sense of self? A personal state of worthiness and respect?
    indeed.

    I would imagine, that even something that seems to most, to be a degrading and even dehumanizing act, could to another, be received with great Dignity. If one doesn't equate their sense of Self to be limited to an act or function, I would imagine that the individual could maintain their Dignity intact. Isn't one's sense of worth and respect encompassed in something greater than an act(s). I dunno, but I'd prefer to imagine that individual integrity and dignity result from some gestalt state of being and existing... and choices that are made that enable individuals to fulfil their lives and living to the greatest possible and to their potential.
    quit trying to be all philosophical. see my reply to Lewis above.

  4. #64
    I had a nurse in rehab (female) explain to a student nurse (also female) that, when doing peri-care on a quad (me at the time), if they don't end up with an erection when you are done - You didn't do a good job.

    It's a good point.

  5. #65
    Quote Originally Posted by Scott Pruett
    indeed.
    ------
    quit trying to be all philosophical. see my reply to Lewis above.
    lol

    ok, if truly "indeed" to my statement, then your post to Lewis regarding "Need" only reinforces my philosophizing (or to some, philosophical crap)

  6. #66
    Its true though at C6 YOU could scrub your pecker and assorted baggage up yer self,what if ya scrubbed your junk yourself and then left the rest to him..to speed along at?

  7. #67
    Quote Originally Posted by chick
    ok, if truly "indeed" to my statement, then your post to Lewis regarding "Need" only reinforces my philosophizing (or to some, philosophical crap)
    if you had a wang, you might understand better. your arguments are moot.

  8. #68
    Quote Originally Posted by chick
    Isn't one's sense of worth and respect encompassed in something greater than an act(s).
    It's all subjective. To you, this may be cool. To him, it's not.

    Cool? Cool.
    ...it's worse than we thought. it turns out the people at the white house are not secret muslims, they're nerds.

  9. #69
    Quote Originally Posted by Scott Pruett
    if you had a wang, you might understand better. your arguments are moot.
    Hey, my twat is no more moot than your wang

    but tis all subjective huh?

    Steven, why are you repeating my point as if you're making some new point?
    Perhaps it's just your wang needing to feel the power of the wang
    Last edited by chick; 12-01-2005 at 08:55 AM. Reason: less to more.... like it really matters, eh

  10. #70
    Shaun please pass the popcorn.....
    1FineSpineRN

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