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Thread: What can I do in this situation

  1. #11
    Member Slider82's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003

    Thanks for all your replies

    Starlight - no, she hasn't asked me to do anything, and probably wouldn't want me to even if I offered (in case you haven't figured out by now, she secretly is my favorite of the 3 kids). Religion has always been a devisive topic in our family anyway, my parents were very strict religious types too and when my sister decided when she was 12 that she didn't believe in God anymore it made for a lot of family fights. My biggest memories were of my father trying to force my sister to pray, he would yell at her and hit her when that didn't work, now she has never trusted religious people since. Anyway I am not sure why I am going off on this tangent except as background.

    As far as this situation is my niece has basically resigned herself to just seeing her friend at school. They e-mail each other when the girl's mother isn't looking.

  2. #12
    First off I want to say that yes there are people in this day and age that are intolerant of other persons' private regilious beliefs that they themselves take for granted. I live around the Indy area, in a town with a large population of Islamic families. In middle school I befriended our neighbors, the Islamic twins Esa and Mussa, by the time I graduated High School I'd recieved over 5 death threats and had been told I was going to hell for being friends with the "infedel". Most of these came from "good Christians". I know how confusing it is for your neice.

    Honestly her friend's mom will probably not change her mind. Your neice needs to tell her mom. Maybe she could tell her mom beforehand that shes afraid of her being angry and "attacking" the person whom upset her.

  3. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Alberta, Canada
    I wouldn't call the mother. I've seen my mom call up other mother's to talk to them about what happened between my sister and other girl's or mother's. My sister seemed to like it if the conversation got a little rough, which sometimes didn't take long. People are stuborn when it comes to there religion but more so when it comes to there kids. People will always bunt heads when it comes to religion. I just stay away from all of it, I know what's right and what's wrong and that should be enough for any God. I've been baptized and all that but I don't read the bible, go to church or answer the door when the Jahovas Whitness come. So if that lady with her one track mind can't respect others beliefs, it's her and her family that are the one's missing out on all the good things her God has laid out for her stuck up thinks her shit don't stink ass. (No offense to God by using swears in the same sentence with his name was meant in this message.) Good luck.

  4. #14
    Boy, I just saw this thread and can not help but think about all the missed opportunities to show the love and grace of our heavenly father.

    If this mother is a true Christian, then she has certainly greived the Holy Spirit by misrepresenting the true compassionate heart of God. Her attitude is not Christlike in any way.

    Just think of all the damage that could last a lifetime. By reading some of the replys, you can already see how God and the Bible is having to bear the brunt of her misrepresentations. Of this, she will have to give an account.


  5. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Cspine
    just strengthens my theory that christianity is just the oldest and largest pyramid scam ever.
    dont misconstrue faith and religion...two different things....

  6. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by rickhemi
    If this mother is a true Christian, then she has certainly greived the Holy Spirit by misrepresenting the true compassionate heart of God. Her attitude is not Christlike in any way.
    I wonder WHO has authority in the CORRECT and TRUE interpretations.

    Perhaps rickhemi as usurped some of this authority in proclaiming this mother as being "not Christlike in any way".

    Quote Originally Posted by jayday9
    dont misconstrue faith and religion...two different things....
    In the context of THIS THREAD, faith is in reference to one's religion, or belief thereof.

    This thread is NOT discussing one's FAITH in orgasms being a spiritual experience, or FAITH in marriage contract promising everlasting Love.

    - Belief in and reverence for a supernatural power or powers regarded as creator and governor of the universe.
    - A personal or institutionalized system grounded in such belief and worship

    - Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.
    - Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence. See Synonyms at belief; trust.
    - Loyalty to a person or thing; allegiance: keeping faith with one's supporters. often Faith Christianity. The theological virtue defined as secure belief in God and a trusting acceptance of God's will.
    - The body of dogma of a religion: the Muslim faith.
    - A set of principles or beliefs.

    It seems that Religion and Faith are not mutually exclusive. Religion is much more a construct, the systematic framework of belief(s), which derives strength and gains power thru Faith. The manifestation of beliefs thru religions/religious practices, or practices in name of religion, is made real and vicerally felt through Faith.

    Seems Religion and Faith can be seperate things, BUT
    Religion is nothing without Faith.
    Faith gives Religion power and strength.

    Seems, it isn't Religion itself, but FAITH, that can be dangerous, destructive or harmful.

    **Slider, sorry if this post has gone off topic to your specific question. I was responding to previous posts but can post it elsewhere, more appropriate.
    Last edited by chick; 10-09-2005 at 07:39 PM.

  7. #17
    There is nothing you can do about the situation. I am trying not to judge anyone here but as your niece has the right to her beliefs. The lady, being the guardian of a minor child, has the right to keep them apart.

  8. #18
    That the 2 girls are begining to figure out a way to get around the one mother's ban of their friendship demonstrates their ability to continue a friendship which may become stronger because of a parents' control to seperate them. What may be the biggest problem of this situation created by the religous mother is the risk she runs of alienating her own daughter. While admittingly a school friendship may not last beyond the school years,the damage this mother has done to her relationship with her daughter may last a lot longer. I can only hope she will relent on this punishment.

  9. #19
    it's understandable that you would be angry when someone you care about has been hurt and insulted, and it's understandable that you would want to 'do' something... religionism just happens to be one of those ugly by-products of human social psychology, like racism or sexism. however you aren't the parent in this situation so i wouldn't think it's your place to intervene. if anything, your niece *should* bring it up with her mother. i suspect that she hasn't done so because she knows her mother will react badly (i don't know if whatever's in her background qualifies as abuse, but for now i'm not going there). imo about all you can do is be supportive and sympathetic and try and show by example that all 'people of faith' *aren't* narrow minded bigots.

    anyway, it seems that the girls have worked out a solution on their own. hope it works out for the best.
    "The only true currency in this bankrupt what you share with someone else when you're uncool." - Almost Famous

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