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Thread: 2 years c6-c7 where do i go

  1. #1

    2 years c6-c7 where do i go

    ive been in a wheelchair now for 2 years . its been devastating to myfamily and me . my wife wants me to leave says she hates me and blames me for all the problems that have come from the injury . i could be totally independent if i had a roll in shower and a van thats set up for me . i try to keep a positive attitude ,but i get so discouraged with all the verbal abuse i recieve from my wife . we just moved from san diego to new mexico ,its not a state for sci surviors . i have 2 beautiful daughters , i want to move back to san diego but i dont want to leave them . where do i go

  2. #2

    Just my two cents

    I don't know what kind of a support system you have besides your wife but it sounds like there's a lot of resentment going on there that can only grow. We have enough guilt on our conscious for putting the people who are closest to us through this ordeal that to hear it verbalized by someone we love really makes you feel like shit. I'm sure it's the frustration coming out on her behalf (it's got to be hard on her to especially with two kids), but, together, you're either going to have to learn to roll with the punches or go your separate ways, in our situation there's no in between. I pray things get better for you.
    C3-C4 complete quad
    since 1/2004
    "I don't fear death, only the method of dying"

  3. #3
    Do you have any resources to see a counselor to help you (and your wife, if she's willing) to work out what the two of you should do. I've seen people separate afer SCI and it really works out for the best and I've seen people tough it through and come to a deeper relationship. But I don't think you can accomplish this alone. You need help. If your wife is employed there is probably an employee assistance program through her work (the same is true for you if you work). These programs help provide short term assistance to people in crisis. You might find help through something like Catholic or Lutheran Community Services or a church sponsored counselling agency for low or no cost.

    The important thing is to try and fine some face-too-face help.

    RAB

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