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Thread: "Friends"

  1. #11
    Friends come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

    Imho, ones for a lifetime are rare, usually very few qualify or meet the grade.

  2. #12
    I don't think it is the SCI but the wheel chair. It is not so strange, you can't go visit anybody anymore because of the stairs, you can't go to a pub, cafe or a restaurant anymore. So it is difficult to socialize and the people forget you. In the beginning they come and visit you but after a while they get bored because you can't go out. Life is a give and take, I can't expect friends and family to give all the time when I can't give anything back.
    TH 12, 43 years post

  3. #13
    It happened to me a lot right after I was injured. Looking back, it sort of makes sense. Almost all of my friends were sort of shallow, and so was I. We really only hung out because we had gymnastics and cheerleading in common. Once I couldn't do that anymore, I guess they figured there was nothing to do anymore. So they just stopped coming around. Meanwhile, I was lying in bed, unable to move anything and thinking my life was over, wondering what I had done to drive them away. I'd like to think that if the shoe was on the other foot, I would have been better, but you never know.

  4. #14
    I must have made friends out of the right people in my life..I had been living for 10yrs in a completely different province when i was injured,my friends were always there.When i made the decision to move back home after all that time,they were waiting for me..they never left,and i couldnt be more thankful that..

  5. #15
    Senior Member Scorpion's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Los Angeles
    Quote Originally Posted by Chris Chappell
    Friends come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

    Imho, ones for a lifetime are rare, usually very few qualify or meet the grade.
    So very true. All the more reason to appreciate our friends while we can, and show them that they are appreciated and cared for.

    Jesse's Mom - It's not just SCI, you're absolutely right. It's just how life works. But I do think a life-altering event like an SCI can cause many friends to "move on" or "grow apart" very quickly shortly after the event (accident, etc). Even so, it doresn't make them bad people; sometimes they're simply not equipped to adapt to the new reality, or perhaps they aren't invested enough to be willing to make the effort.

  6. #16
    Senior Member cali's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    where everyone knows your name
    a lot of my friends are guys, and it turns out most of them were trying to get in my pants. but i'm not that kind of girl so i don't know why they bothered....liked to chase i guess.

    well a lot of them came to see me in the hospital, but it was such a ridiculous display of testosterone induced territoral match. i don't have time for that shit, i just broke my neck, come on.

    i don't talk to most of them anymore, but a few stuck around. i'm grateful for my friends that stuck around and my new friends now.
    Never take life seriously, nobody gets out alive anyway

    Frank's blog:
    My regular blog:

  7. #17
    I had alot of freinds come to the hospital, "I don't remember that" but also had alot come to the rehab and see me. When I first got home for about 2 weeks there was someone everyday, then it tapered off, then I had one stealing my pain med's, Caught him on VTape. but all in all I think alot of people tend to go on with their lives and most of the time we are NOT included, simply because we are not mobile. Some call every 6 months or so, but alot has to do with my holding up here at home and not getting out. Guess it is what we make out of it ourselves?

  8. #18
    I like to think even if I haven't talked to a friend or acquaintance in a long while due to distance or life circumstances that they would want to talk to me the same as since the last day we spoke and that they could count on me. SCI or not, it just depends on the person. We live and learn, and everyone is different, thats for sure. Reminds me of the song by Kenny Chesney, Keg In the Closet.

  9. #19
    Senior Member alan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Baltimore, MD
    Sounds like I'm not the only one in this situation. It does suck.

    Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

  10. #20
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Alberta, Canada

    Friends, What Friends?

    I had a shit pile of friends before my accident but after I was left like a pile of shit. I was always there for my friends when they needed my help. Even if they didn't ask I was there for them. The minute the tables were turned and I needed someone they were gone. I knew it was coming, even before they knew it. It just hadn't sunk in to there brains that I wasn't going to be as useful to them. It took about 3 months before the last one stopped calling. I must have known deep down I had crappy friends that would bounce as soon as I wasn't doing enough for them. Guess I was a sucker. A lesson learned the hard way. Oh well, mabey if I get another life after this one I'll remember to chose my friends very carefully.

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