Quote Originally Posted by Mize View Post
SCI ends the life before in a very real sense and as long as you're still looking backwards at that old life, you will suffer.
So put it in your back pocket, get a job or volunteer but get plugged into places with other people and move forward.
I feel like this is part of the reason why I have dealt (relatively) well with SCI. I had decided to change my whole life very shortly before I was injured. I was in my mid 20s and decided I wanted to go on a little motorcycle trip for the next year or two, so I sold all of my belongings that wouldn't fit into a couple of boxes of nostalgic items I stashed at my parents house, closed down the business I had been running for the past 4 years or so, strapped a couple bags to my motorcycle and headed out. It had always been something of a plan for me to go on a trip like that so it was in the back of my mind, and kind of the last straw was a relationship not working out with a chick I went on a few dates with. It wasn't anything serious or devestating, but I probably would have hung around and postponed plans for a few months if it seemed like it was going somewhere interesting. I crashed 8 weeks or so into my trip.

So at the time of my injury I had:
1. Shut down my business with no specific plan for what to do in the future when my money ran out
2. Quit school (was several semesters on and off into a half assed college career)
3. Moved out of my studio apartment on the second floor with no plans for where I would live whenever I returned
4. Become/remained single (we were never really "together")
5. Got rid of all of my stuff with the exception of some clothes, tools and a motorcycle.

I was in such a transitional situation, and had intentionally put myself in that situation at the time of my injury that I think it allowed me to adapt to the injury rather well. There was no job that I suddenly couldn't do. I didn't have to take time off of school to deal with hospitalization and learning the SCI ropes because I wasn't currently in school. I didn't have to move out of an inaccessible apartment because I already left and had no place to go. I had no significant other to see how that affected the relationship. I didn't have a bunch of skis/skateboards/bicycles/etc other toys that I could suddenly no longer use. I wasn't in any daily routine of jogging or hiking or anything because life on the road was unpredictable and I just took it a day at a time and it was different everywhere I went.

This and the expectation I already had before the injury that my life was about to inevitably change allowed me to roll with the punches as the forced change of life with SCI punched me in the gut. I already had the whimsical immature notion that this road trip would make me a different person somehow, and as that was what I was expecting I had a relatively vague sense of what made me "me", and realistically no long term plans for the future that were disrupted by SCI.

Then I quickly threw myself headlong into a relatively challenging career that comes with a bit more prestige than the average (my ego probably needed that post injury) and required so much work that I wouldn't have time to get bogged down in thinking about what I'd lost and what I couldn't do. In retrospect I shouldn't have been successful (hell maybe I'm still not, but I feel like I'm on the cusp since I completely finish my training in 15 months), but it seems to have turned out pretty well so far. If I went back in time and put 10 me's in the place that I was at 11 years ago when I was injured I wouldn't expect more than one of them to make it (career wise), and I do sometimes wonder what would have happened to the other 9 after they lost that career dream on top of all the other SCI nastiness. About four years ago there was a period of time where I was almost certain my career was over before it started and that was a very, very dark time.

Idk why I'm still typing, I'm gonna stfu.