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Thread: Me Before You

  1. #61
    Quote Originally Posted by Oddity View Post
    Clinging to impossible to meet expectations is nothing to be proud about. It is absurd. As life changes, so must expectations. Neglecting this truth is at the root of much suffering. If life is intolerable, end it. If it is tolerable, live it. Drifting inbetween is a poor choice IMO.
    Dropping your expectations for yourself at the drop of a hat just to accommodate A situation no matter how void of freedom, burdensome and undignified, is definitely nothing to be proud of! That's absurd. What's hysterical is you think you speak truth, you think of the impossible just because nobody has done it, so you instantly accept defeat and try to classify it as something it's not ! Justify it as simply adapting to change. Instead of trying to be someone to make the impossible possible, but even more disgusting you try and take that mediocre stance, and convey it as something rational maybe even inspiring! It's sad only in the spinal cord injury community would something like that fly! Talk about dropping expectations!


    Then again you're not a burden on anyone, and you can handle all the nasty business yourself, and you are relatively free to act on your own... Which is evident by your clear ignorance on the simplicity of suicide as if anyone can just do it,easy to say with so many options and resources easily obtainable by your logical imagination.


    Nobody talked of being proud of it, it is an ugly thing with very obscure mentalities behind it, maybe we just hold our principles true... And still hold the same integrity, we did before we simply bumped our spinal cord. I don't know I only speak for myself I can't speak for others
    Last edited by JamesMcM; 07-08-2016 at 03:20 PM.

  2. #62
    Quote Originally Posted by eskay View Post
    I am not proud about how I feel, but I am honest.
    Is it wrong to see things as they are?
    I consider myself to be a realist, and with being that you must be very practical as well.

    I am not neglecting the truth, I'm seeing it for what it is.

    I wish I was delusional enough to endure life as a quad, believe me I do.
    Perhaps believe in a God who was 'testing' me.

    But I am not narcissistic enough to be religious, and I am not ignorant enough to be delusional.


    So I remain trapped. You're right though, it is a poor 'choice'
    Well said!

  3. #63
    All right, my bad I participated in this and now this valuable conversation that may have died down since that movie was released quite sometime ago but nonetheless still valuable conversation has now gone to Lala land. Capngimp perhaps we will continue this conversation in the private messages, however I've asked if these could be deleted and have this thread move back to the life section

  4. #64
    Divided into two separate threads.

    (KLD)

  5. #65
    Senior Member Oddity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JamesMcM View Post
    Dropping your expectations for yourself at the drop of a hat just to accommodate A situation no matter how void of freedom, burdensome and undignified, is definitely nothing to be proud of! That's absurd. What's hysterical is you think you speak truth, you think of the impossible just because nobody has done it, so you instantly accept defeat and try to classify it as something it's not ! Justify it as simply adapting to change. Instead of trying to be someone to make the impossible possible, but even more disgusting you try and take that mediocre stance, and convey it as something rational maybe even inspiring! It's sad only in the spinal cord injury community would something like that fly! Talk about dropping expectations!
    It's called adaptation, and it is one aspect of being human that separates us from 'lower life forms'. You can certainly choose not to adapt, to be miserable and bitch and moan and groan about what you can't change. That is part of being human too, having free will, even when using it to be negative, and to hurt yourself. Some of us like to use what we have left to attain some peace, which is hardly something you can (rationally) find fault with.


    Then again you're not a burden on anyone, and you can handle all the nasty business yourself, and you are relatively free to act on your own... Which is evident by your clear ignorance on the simplicity of suicide as if anyone can just do it,easy to say with so many options and resources easily obtainable by your logical imagination.
    Being a quad doesn't physically limit you from ending your life. That's just another excuse based on lacking the strength of will to go through with it. You can literally do NOTHING and be dead in less than a week. The limitation isn't what you are physically capable of, it is psychological.


    Nobody talked of being proud of it, it is an ugly thing with very obscure mentalities behind it, maybe we just hold our principles true... And still hold the same integrity, we did before we simply bumped our spinal cord. I don't know I only speak for myself I can't speak for others
    Having a spinal cord sucks, to be sure. But being miserable AND having a spinal cord sucks more. They don't HAVE to go hand in hand. Our state of mind is not necessarily bound to the state of our body. Some states of body make it hard, some harder than others, but to believe there is no way to authentically adapt, to say it is a flaw of character to adapt, is a foolish and short sighted generalization that minimizes SO many people and the effort they put into not being miserable sacks of sorrow.

    Minimize yourself all you want. That's your prerogative.
    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it." - Edgar Allen Poe

    "If you only know your side of an issue, you know nothing." -John Stuart Mill, On Liberty

    "Even what those with the greatest reputation for knowing it all claim to understand and defend are but opinions..." -Heraclitus, Fragments

  6. #66
    Removed my "ouch" comment after the scathing post aimed at "Oddity" was removed by moderator.

    All the best,
    GJ

    Last edited by gjnl; 09-05-2016 at 07:42 PM.

  7. #67
    Senior Member Oddity's Avatar
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    INAPPROPRIATE POST AND QUOTE OF SAME WHICH VIOLATES CCC RULES REMOVED. (KLD)

    If you any insight, beyond lashing out like a child at someone you don't agree with, you'd probably be dealing better with being crippled. Enjoy making yourself miserable.
    Last edited by SCI-Nurse; 09-05-2016 at 03:23 PM.
    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it." - Edgar Allen Poe

    "If you only know your side of an issue, you know nothing." -John Stuart Mill, On Liberty

    "Even what those with the greatest reputation for knowing it all claim to understand and defend are but opinions..." -Heraclitus, Fragments

  8. #68
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    I can't imagine. I really can't. I'd probably be suicidal too ... but keeping busy does help. Now that I've been off work for 3yrs, I've been so restless ... but sick with complications at the same time not even allowing me the chance to volunteer finally.

    Being miserable all the time really sucks too though. Learned that after 32yrs of experience.

    I hope Edgerton is onto something and quads can move fingers again soon ... my best friend who is quadriplegic actually doesn't want it ... she thinks it would be uber painful after 28yrs. Hope she's proven wrong.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  9. #69
    Quote Originally Posted by eskay View Post
    You're missing the point.
    Those quads you speak of that lead "happy loving lives" have succumb to their injury.
    They've settled for an inferior life.
    One that's hardly respectable, and one that's truly pitiful.
    There's no denying that. The things a complete quad has to endure are pathetic.
    If you're content living a life that is as dependent as an infant, well then by all means...

    For some people that's just not acceptable though. Can you fault them for that?
    So what is the point exactly?

    - You see 'Quality' and 'Happiness' fixed states.

    - If feeling one has a happy and loving life is succumbing to injury, thus settling for an inferior, pitiful life that's hardly respectable, then explain what not succumbing to injury entails? Death?

    Quote Originally Posted by eskay View Post
    I am not proud about how I feel, but I am honest.
    Is it wrong to see things as they are?
    I consider myself to be a realist, and with being that you must be very practical as well.

    I am not neglecting the truth, I'm seeing it for what it is.

    I wish I was delusional enough to endure life as a quad, believe me I do.
    Perhaps believe in a God who was 'testing' me.

    But I am not narcissistic enough to be religious, and I am not ignorant enough to be delusional.


    So I remain trapped. You're right though, it is a poor 'choice'
    You are honest and a realist who sees things 'as they are' - the 'TRUTH'.

    And as you state, enduring life as a quad is to be delusional and to be delusional is to be ignorant.

    So let's be real and see the obvious for what it is and not neglect the truth, as you've declared here.
    You are alive and living as a quad (a given, based on your postings).
    Therefore:
    - You are enduring life as a quad, no if's and's or but's.
    - You are delusional
    - You are ignorant enough

  10. #70
    Quote Originally Posted by chick View Post
    So what is the point exactly?

    - You see 'Quality' and 'Happiness' fixed states.

    - If feeling one has a happy and loving life is succumbing to injury, thus settling for an inferior, pitiful life that's hardly respectable, then explain what not succumbing to injury entails? Death?

    In many cases. yes.
    I respect those who can acknowledge that their life has deteriorated beyond a point that is respectable to them. I don't think it's right to live a life dependent on others just to exist.

    Perhaps you enjoy someone wiping your ass?

    Or maybe you delude your mind just enough to where it doesn't bother you.
    Either way, congrats.


    It's difficult for me to have much self respect when having to endure the things that quads have to.
    I can't ignore my realities. And I can't respect indignities.


    Quote Originally Posted by chick View Post
    You are honest and a realist who sees things 'as they are' - the 'TRUTH'.

    And as you state, enduring life as a quad is to be delusional and to be delusional is to be ignorant.

    So let's be real and see the obvious for what it is and not neglect the truth, as you've declared here.
    You are alive and living as a quad (a given, based on your postings).
    Therefore:
    - You are enduring life as a quad, no if's and's or but's.
    - You are delusional
    - You are ignorant enough

    Sure, I see things as they are, as they relate to me and the things I value and respect.
    Quadriplegia? Nah.

    As I said, I wish I could embrace it.
    It's not something I respect.


    Are you a complete quad? Just curious

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