Page 8 of 13 FirstFirst 12345678910111213 LastLast
Results 71 to 80 of 127

Thread: Suicide

  1. #71
    Exactly, that's what I always thought about Suicide is it's a permanent bad solution to what than more likely is a temporary problem.
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Last edited by SCI-Nurse; 05-25-2014 at 09:12 PM. Reason: Removed quote from spammer.
    "Life is about how you
    respond to not only the
    challenges you're dealt but
    the challenges you seek...If
    you have no goals, no
    mountains to climb, your
    soul dies".~Liz Fordred

  2. #72
    James, unfortunately some people do define themselves completely by their physicality. This is especially true of Americans and Canadians, especially men, and less common in Europeans and Asians. It is sad that someone has defined themselves purely on what is fleeting and non-permanent (their physical body and prowess) and not at all on their personality, and traits which are less likely to change with time (good sense of humor, intelligence, problem solving skills, etc.).

    Continuing to be ruminating on what used to be, and comparing yourself to what used to be that is no more is a foundation of depression and negative self image. A good psychologist could help you talk through this stuff, and learn to move forward with your life and reframe your self-definitions. Sadly, I don't think from what I have seen above you are willing to give that route a chance.

    (KLD)
    Last edited by SCI-Nurse; 05-25-2014 at 09:11 PM.

  3. #73
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Windsor ON Canada
    Posts
    19,320
    I didn't read the other responses, but there is some research that shows that spinal cord injuries - in the very nature of themselves - can cause depression. Chemical depression. I wouldn't discount a mild anti-depressant. The caveat is you have to find the one that works for you ... Celexa for me on a low dose for the past 10yrs (out of 29). I tried two before that I would have ended it on so it's hit and miss.

    Also, just plain ole sunlight to get that Vitamin D. Sometimes a pet can help?

    Try to focus on what you CAN do.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  4. #74
    Quote Originally Posted by lynnifer View Post
    I didn't read the other responses, but there is some research that shows that spinal cord injuries - in the very nature of themselves - can cause depression. Chemical depression. I wouldn't discount a mild anti-depressant. The caveat is you have to find the one that works for you ... Celexa for me on a low dose for the past 10yrs (out of 29). I tried two before that I would have ended it on so it's hit and miss.

    Also, just plain ole sunlight to get that Vitamin D. Sometimes a pet can help?

    Try to focus on what you CAN do.
    Exercise especially anaerobic it is one of the best ways to produce serotonin and help release it, so of course lack of movement is going to cause chemical depression, and SCI also damages your CNS. But like I said in a post before where I explained that I don't think depression is a medical condition in itself and on its own.

  5. #75
    Quote Originally Posted by JamesMcM View Post
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ioFG999aOCs

    watch this Allen watts is a genius. Wonderful philosopher that uses common sense that you never think about or don't know how to put into words.
    One evening I went to see Alan Watts with my Mom at El Camino College. I was a junior or senior in high school, at this time. I have read his books, but this was a long time ago.

    James, I believe you have a story to tell. You should memorialize your life. Start a blog. Write a book. I am sorry that you were cut down in the prime of your life.
    The test of success is not what you do when you are on top. Success is how high you bounce when you hit the bottom
    --General George Patton

    Complex problems need to be solved collectively.
    ––Paul Nussbaum
    usc87.blogspot.com

  6. #76
    Senior Member zillazangel's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Carolina, USA
    Posts
    3,399
    Quote Originally Posted by JamesMcM View Post
    Exercise especially anaerobic it is one of the best ways to produce serotonin and help release it, so of course lack of movement is going to cause chemical depression, and SCI also damages your CNS. But like I said in a post before where I explained that I don't think depression is a medical condition in itself and on its own.
    You are very very very wrong about this. People both AB and SCI get leveled by depression and there are pharmacologically appropriate treatments for it. I would not be so cavalier in dismissing this possibility for yourself. Your writing clearly shows you are depressed.

    Edited to add: my husband has been paralyzed at a higher level than you are for 26 years and he is the toughest dude mentally I have ever known. I met him 15 post-injury and we have a sex life by the way. I compare his toughness to the bullshit you have been writing in this thread and shake my head. All this talk of how physically tough you were is nauseating after awhile. WHO CARES? You have a new body, and you have to deal with it one way or another. You'll either deal with it by whining some more ..... or deal with it in a more positive way. Sorry to be harsh, I just hate to see someone with more function than Chad act like life is over when he has survived, fought and thrived for 26 YEARS.
    Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

  7. #77
    Quote Originally Posted by zillazangel View Post
    You are very very very wrong about this. People both AB and SCI get leveled by depression and there are pharmacologically appropriate treatments for it. I would not be so cavalier in dismissing this possibility for yourself. Your writing clearly shows you are depressed.

    Edited to add: my husband has been paralyzed at a higher level than you are for 26 years and he is the toughest dude mentally I have ever known. I met him 15 post-injury and we have a sex life by the way. I compare his toughness to the bullshit you have been writing in this thread and shake my head. All this talk of how physically tough you were is nauseating after awhile. WHO CARES? You have a new body, and you have to deal with it one way or another. You'll either deal with it by whining some more ..... or deal with it in a more positive way. Sorry to be harsh, I just hate to see someone with more function than Chad act like life is over when he has survived, fought and thrived for 26 YEARS.
    Sorry to be harsh haha that's funny!! Why did you feel that the need to post such repetitive babble, yes that's what it is to read my post about how I feel about myself whining about this then go on and talk about the me whining and how strongly you feel about it is ludicrous, just retarded. You hate it, I despise it down to the very fabric and described it in detail earlier, but I also think the procedures that have been done to keep me alive and are still done are completely sickening and hate that even more, life should never have gotten so far after an injury like this, with my consent of course. In my opinion a doctor should give you an overview of how your life will be from now on, after the a series functional test of course, then give you the ultimate decision, well in acute care after The initial shock.


    Okay well you felt the need to stay your opinion on your perception of mental toughness, and your distaste for the way I spoke about my physical toughness before. I guess I should respond as kindly as possible with the way I feel on this subject. I have a hard time listening to people describe how people severely paralyzed being tough mentally or physically, they get dealt a blow everyone's devastated at first then they just slowly I adjust to their prison cell, taking every possible handout they can, psychiatrist, antidepressants, occupational therapist, social workers, case managers etc Who get you a wheelchair, get you a adapted place, get you pills, get you someone to talk to, get you caregivers The perfect little mouse and barrel. They accept every simple tasks being done for them with no shame, just disregard things like anal fondling and Dick grabbing as nothing more than perfectly acceptable caregiving. I not picking up any faintest reflection of adversity, difficulty, fight that proves this tremendous amount of toughness on MY radar. NOW understand that this is nothing more then my opinion, on a completely subjective manner it's all how one looks at it, all perspective, same as yours. And to argue about anything subjective is absolutely ridiculous no one person or persons can hold more value to or over another, on these matters. But let's see who gets more defensive and as if trying to prove something. And before one speaks up on well what are the other options I given you what my opinion on what actions should be taken for myself, I wouldn't dare to comment on how other people should react or handle this situation that's each individual's decision. That's The epitome of what I hate about SCI Community I found a life and I found meaning after this so you will too, okay were all different pretty ridiculous assumption to make, just based off majorities and minorities.


    But all nonsense aside, what did you expect to come from what you said, I'm curious? Did you expect me to be alarmed and go dear God I can move my biceps and shoulders and by God I can breathe on my own I know have a life and perspective. I am very aware there's injuries worse than mine but for me specifically because my right arm is weirdly more damaged then it should be my level of independence isn't much different, and for me personally I see no life with or without a ventilator. I can't say I'm thankful for my remaining function because I'm not that would be a lie I'd be thankful if I died that morning. I thought we all were understanding nobody wins the who has it worse game though.


    This was all the brutal honesty on my perspective. Now i'm sure some of you will judge as you see fit. Sue has given me the answer I originally asked, although not 100% definite but still. A lot you are not trying to help me or give me advice (which is fine) but like above there's no advice given, you're just trying to prove something not to me but to yourselves.

    As for the matter of depression, I disagree with what you're saying that's all. I have no doubt about the chemicals in the brain and drugs can replace or level out these chemicals everything we observe or reacting is a chemical reaction that's our brain how it works. Of course I'm depressed what an absolutely obvious observation. But if I were to instantly have my body back right now I would no longer be depressed within a few days hours, minutes maybe. That's what I'm saying depression is just what follows certain situations, you don't catch a case of depression like a cold, or get infected with it nor a trauma caused injury etc it follows certain scenarios that if overcome or realistically in this case looked past it Will dissipate on it's own, as if it wasn't even there. In the past I also hated school had lots of friends played sports, but couldn't stand sitting in a classroom listening to the man following the perfect little role, my diagnostic depressed. Supposedly depression has been a big part of my life, trust me I don't want to get into every situation or detail but. My mother was a drunk my dad hated himself and thought little of himself and reflected that on to me, and at times a drunk. I didn't like being home, I've didn't enjoyed my parents company depressed. Even though In school at recess happiest kid out there just a little bundle of troublesome joy very rambunctious. Depression is the vaguest medical term ever, and is used far too often with little to no evidence most of the time it's just an assumption, oh you haven't left your house in seven days i'm worried about depressed. It's ridiculous. Depression to me is just excessive or repetitive sadness.

  8. #78
    James, your writing reminds me of myself 10 years ago. Dismissive of sage advice from those who have been there, and lame excuses to try to falsely justify my failure to accept my new life.

    Thanks to some of the people here and close friends in my life, something finally clicked for me. I stopped making excuses and rejoined society. I started going out and working. It took longer to feel comfortable dating and have intimate relationships, but I got there as well. I was even engaged and bought a new house last year, but that didn't work out. Life isn't always easy, whether you're able-bodied or a quad.

    I used to be on these forums daily before life became too busy. I've spent the last few days immersing myself and trying to catch up on many members here. It's fitting that we remember those we have lost: dogger, Max, Rusty, Susan F., Clayton, and Christina. I'm sure there are many others. I didn't "know" the last two like I did the others, but I've read a lot about them the last 3 or 4 days. I read Chrissy's book yesterday, as well as many of her posts here and on her blog. I can't believe I missed her story. I even discovered that I interacted with her when she was working on getting out of the nursing facility. Fittingly for me, I made an inappropriate comment about all of the jokes I could make if I had a service monkey.

    Start living your life instead of making excuses.

  9. #79
    Senior Member Oddity's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Virginia Beach, VA
    Posts
    3,602
    Blog Entries
    1
    James,

    A doctor can't tell you what your life will be like. That has to do with your Mind, and Will, NOT your body. They can define our physical limitations, at that point in time, but HOW your life will be is defined by what my dearly departed Nana used to call "testicular fortitude".


    As an aside, if you spent the time, energy, and capacity you clearly have - to create the volume of text you do on this forum - studying, and authoring, computer programs, you could find a six figure job, in short order! Or, write a book. Or, any # of productive, worthwhile, and life-enhancing endeavors!
    "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it." - Edgar Allen Poe

    "If you only know your side of an issue, you know nothing." -John Stuart Mill, On Liberty

    "Even what those with the greatest reputation for knowing it all claim to understand and defend are but opinions..." -Heraclitus, Fragments

  10. #80
    Senior Member ChesBay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    Coastal Virginia
    Posts
    1,632
    Quote Originally Posted by SCI-Nurse View Post
    James, unfortunately some people do define themselves completely by their physicality. This is especially true of Americans and Canadians, especially men, and less common in Europeans and Asians. It is sad that someone has defined themselves purely on what is fleeting and non-permanent (their physical body and prowess) and not at all on their personality, and traits which are less likely to change with time (good sense of humor, intelligence, problem solving skills, etc.).

    Continuing to be ruminating on what used to be, and comparing yourself to what used to be that is no more is a foundation of depression and negative self image. A good psychologist could help you talk through this stuff, and learn to move forward with your life and reframe your self-definitions. Sadly, I don't think from what I have seen above you are willing to give that route a chance.

    (KLD)
    Pearls of wisdom from SCI nurse.

    Give life a try James. You can always revisit your options in 5 or 10 years.

Similar Threads

  1. Suicide
    By cheesecake in forum Life
    Replies: 621
    Last Post: 07-09-2009, 07:03 PM
  2. Suicide
    By CapnGimp in forum Life
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 07-18-2007, 04:28 AM
  3. suicide
    By suoz in forum Life
    Replies: 49
    Last Post: 02-07-2007, 12:02 PM
  4. suicide
    By Afraid in forum Life
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-05-2006, 02:58 PM
  5. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-14-2005, 11:47 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •