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Thread: Threats of suicide

  1. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Whately, MA United States
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    AND... January 1st is the first New Moon on New Years Day in nineteen years. All good portents!

  2. #12
    Hey whatsa, what a horrible situation. All you can do is hope he pulls himself out of it, sadly, if he dies because of his lifestyle there is little anyone can do. You could go all "Doctor Phil" on his ass and have an intervention and all of that?.

  3. #13
    Senior Member pfcs49's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    NW NJ ***********T12 cmplt since 95
    I'm an alcoholic/addict and a T12 para (30 &18years). There is another guy nearby who's got long term sobriety and three years T5. We are north central NJ if you are near.
    I am grateful to be an alcoholic and, lately, I am realizing that without the experiences of being paralyzed, my life might not have been so satisfying. My life is extraordinary and exceeds the expectations I had even before my injury.
    There's not much you and mom can do until he's willing or he crosses a line that brings consequences that might turn him (suicide attempt & confinement/rehab?).
    The best way to deal with an addict is to take care of yourselves, get off the co-dependent merry-go-round, and let go of him. Becoming involved in regular alanon or narcanon meetings is a good start. In AA it is said "we are a program of attraction, not promotion", and this is powerfully true. When you two take your power back (he is living in your heads rent-free and destroying your serenity at minimum), and begin to detach with love, you will learn how wounded and sick you have become, and how to nurture yourselves and get YOUR needs met, set healthy limits, and let your brother take responsibility for HIS life.
    When you learn how to do that, you will start to look a lot better. And your brother may notice this also. Seeing your recoveries will make his own look like a possibility.
    OR, he may die of his disease. This is the ugly truth about addiction, but enabling him is no good option. You are hurting him.You can't control him, only give him the space to recover in if he chooses. Google local alanon meetings and attend. Say that you're doing it for him until you're doing it for yourself. Spend time with people just like you. Your problems are not unique. You will find comfort and support that you've never experienced before and your life will improve. I promise

    PM me if you like

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