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Thread: Suicide

  1. #11
    I try not to think about it or give in to it. I don't want to miss a minute of my grandchildren growing up. All the time I can spend with my husband and kids, or just enjoying a sunny day. I have to make myself move on most days, but it's worth it in the end.

    The nights are the hardest......the hours between night and day, when all is quiet and I'm rocking back and forth, wanting the daylight to come. Those are the hours I am the most alone, and in the most pain.

    I think everyone has to find what works for them. We live on the edge with this sort of pain. Not far from heaven or hell. I work hard at just keeping the pieces together. It's hard when you can't even enjoy the simple things anymore, like just taking a ride in the park. Even riding in the car, hurts. I refuse to believe that there is nothing of me left. As long as I can take one breath.......there is some of me here. There are days I hurt too much to move, but on the days I can manage, I try to sew or write my postcards, or something!

    Everything is at it's worst when we lose all hope. I pray you find some relief Bill.

  2. #12
    Senior Member alan's Avatar
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    Just make sure you take me along, or I willl say nasty things to your spirit. For the rest of my life.

    I's now 32 years of torture. Now with the blasted sweating while sitting issue added. Where is a Kevorkian machine when I need one? Or a stray Baltimore city murderer to pop me?
    Alan

    Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

  3. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Foolish Old View Post
    Again, I believe that Care & Cure don't play well with suicide.
    Word.

    Too many are too close to the edge as is, especially newer injuries, and such a discussion may encourage others to spiral down where they might have moved away from the cliff instead of moving more closely to it or dropping off it.

    FO is correct. These discussions are better handled face to face in private AND with qualified professionals.

  4. #14
    Senior Member rdf's Avatar
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    I don't see a problem with discussing suicide, as long as advice on how to accomplish it isn't part of the discussion.

    If someone feels like taking their life, it's their choice. Release and relief would be welcome for many people with SCI. Otoh, being able to talk to people who are also suffering and thinking about suicide, the commiseration might be beneficial and introduce points of view that affirm life is still worth living, points not previously known to those partaking in the discussion.
    Quote Originally Posted by LaMemChose View Post
    Word.

    Too many are too close to the edge as is, especially newer injuries, and such a discussion may encourage others to spiral down where they might have moved away from the cliff instead of moving more closely to it or dropping off it.

    FO is correct. These discussions are better handled face to face in private AND with qualified professionals.
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  5. #15
    Senior Member chris-k's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foolish Old View Post
    There is also the option of communicating with interested fellow members in private conversations.

    Again, I believe that Care & Cure don't play well with suicide.
    Like many here, when the pain, AD, and other complications of SCI seem overwhelming, I have dark thoughts about ending it all.

    I rest, take my meds and hope it passes. I know suicide would have a terrible effect on my family and I still have good days I look forward to, I hope!

    45 years and counting, I keep going because of momentum I think, that and I am basically a coward -- surviving suicide would be an unthinkable terror.

    As for communicating with interested fellow members in private conversations, I'm in if it helps somebody. No great advise to offer, but others have helped me in the past so maybe I can pay it forward.

  6. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by chris-k View Post
    Like many here, when the pain, AD, and other complications of SCI seem overwhelming, I have dark thoughts about ending it all.

    I rest, take my meds and hope it passes. I know suicide would have a terrible effect on my family and I still have good days I look forward to, I hope!

    45 years and counting, I keep going because of momentum I think, that and I am basically a coward -- surviving suicide would be an unthinkable terror.

    As for communicating with interested fellow members in private conversations, I'm in if it helps somebody. No great advise to offer, but others have helped me in the past so maybe I can pay it forward.
    When I was in rehab there was a head injury unit right next door to the SCI unit I was on. One lady in her 30s survived a self-inflicted gun shot wound to the head (left 1/3rd of her head blown off and missing one eye and socket with half her body paralyzed). It would be nice if all of us could find a peaceful refuge in this life no matter how small.

  7. #17
    Senior Member Cowboys_Place's Avatar
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    I've known two guys who have taken their own lives. Neither suffered from pain both were high quads and neither it seems mentioned anything too anyone. Then I know someone who has every reason to want to end things pain, sores, recurring Uti's and for the most part tries to have nothing but a positive outlook on life.

    Myself I find my mind is on the thread subject more and more and had even started writing goodbye letters four months ago. I come on here and with everyone's encouragement and knowing I'm not the only one going through this I've been able to turn the calendar a few more pages.
    Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway. .(John Wayne)

  8. #18
    Senior Member rdf's Avatar
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    Just keep it an open discussion, to banish it to PMs is like hiding from the problem. Keeping it in the dark. I think Bill's original post is important.
    Quote Originally Posted by kk
    can we have a meaningful discussion here? I'm weary of the struggle and am spiraling down. I dont think it should be ignored and i'm hoping for a serious dialog. I am not insane but there is nothing left, all that i am is all gone and pain has already taken my light and soul, leaving only a totured body.

    I have questions and comments and suspect a few of us do

    Moderators i know how troubling this is to the community and at some level to its goals, but if not here with our family who understand, where.

    Respectfully,

    Ket
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  9. #19
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    Irony. Just looked at today's birthdays and Susan Fajt's was today ... I know it wasn't a suicide (I hope) but still .. floored me.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  10. #20
    I'd suggest to anybody DON'T DO IT. Life is precious, work through what you've got going on and things can change. There has to be some sort of Joy in your life? If you feel there is not take up new interests and stay busy, that is the key. Have a purpose in life.
    "Life is about how you
    respond to not only the
    challenges you're dealt but
    the challenges you seek...If
    you have no goals, no
    mountains to climb, your
    soul dies".~Liz Fordred

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