so i should be in a "facility"

[crypticgimp]

crypt, been here a long time. yes, this has been tough yr since pelvic pain started in april. geesh, i thought this was safe place to come and say my true feelings in middle of the night when pain has been so bad. now i don't think so. i have very good helper. she comes in couple hrs/day and nobody comes on weekends. i also have few issues w/doctors. so. i take your post to tell me to shut up. i will. sorry. i even looked at my posts over 4-5 pages. i didn't see much there but somebody in pain.

then you're taking my post the wrong way, unfortunately.

[Coleen]

Cass - post away! And consider the source of the bad info she's gotten - you don't need any home but the one you're in!

[Beth67]

Cass sorry what you've encountered. It's hard to hear those kind of words!
It's awful she thinks you need to be in a facility.

[Andy]

Take it with a 'consider the source' grain of salt. I've been finding that the bigger the Zero I encounter, the bigger issue they have with the SCI. I figure they need a leg up for their perceived societal status or something.

[lynnifer]

she gets her info from her deadbeat son (my son's dad), who i also have no contact with any more since i don't give him money. i will stay off fb late at night when i am in so much pain.

No as long as it's just venting ... whew! You are in a lot of pain and at the end of your rope ... that much is obvious. When you start saying goodbye, I get worried.

Wish you could see the docs I saw in Toronto.

[darkeyed_daisy]

crypt, been here a long time. yes, this has been tough yr since pelvic pain started in april. geesh, i thought this was safe place to come and say my true feelings in middle of the night when pain has been so bad. now i don't think so. i have very good helper. she comes in couple hrs/day and nobody comes on weekends. i also have few issues w/doctors. so. i take your post to tell me to shut up. i will. sorry. i even looked at my posts over 4-5 pages. i didn't see much there but somebody in pain.

I think you are reading the concern of those who care about you wrong. It doesn't mean shut up.

It means chronic pain can put you in a place where you are not able to manage lots of things. I've been there. It can even inhibit the ability to flip on the TV. You don't realize it but your friends and people who care about you can see. I am thankful a true friend pointed out to me the marked changes she had seen just by my posts here. I knew something was wrong but could not fix it myself. I am grateful for those phone calls she made to me. Her exact words were "I don't want you to think I am out to "hurt your feelings but instead they are out of my concern for you". "Even if you never talk to me again, I want you to hear what I need to say." So began the conversation... At first, I was defensive thinking what right does this person have to hurt my feelings. Then an hour later, I was thinking well she is a Northerner and maybe she meant well and just said it wrong. Later on in the afternoon, she called back and I realized this friend really does care about me and I really needed someone right then to care about finding a solution to the pain that I just could not fix nor deal with anymore. She started listing stuff that I needed to do and made me get paper and a pen then I had to read back the list to her.

You may not be where I was yet but it scares me that you might be soon.

I know you have been resistant and vocal about pain medicine. You have to weigh the benefits of pain management against your misery. At least try it to see if it helps some of your misery. Sometimes, there just is no cause other than aging.

I truly consider you a friend and one of the people I would want to hang out with in one of those quirky music venues you post about IF I every make it to the Northwest. Even if I make it to the West coast it would be worth a drive north to meet up and listen to the music you enjoy.

I don't always come across in some of my posts to type exactly what I am trying to say. I think alot of what I feel does not get translated with typed words. I try to remember that when responding to others too but alot gets "lost in translation".

So...since this is the ex mother in law, consider the source. You obviously have been truly a "superwoman" since your accident. Not many people can proudly say they raised their kids on their own when even a huge number of able bodied find it easy to walk away from child rearing these days. If you think she said it with malice then just ignore her but if she truly is a caring person and you have known her to really care for you, then think about what she said. Sometimes people who truly care about you say things the wrong way and it really really hurts. But they say things only out of concern for you.

When was the last time you truly enjoyed a trip to one of those quirky music venues you enjoy? I can tell you from experience, when my friend asked me the same question about the last time I truly enjoyed anything, I was dumbfounded when I actually figured the answer.

Chronic uncontrolled pain does this Cass.

[pararich]

I'm sorry you've been dealing with pain, Cass.
I have chronic pain myself.
Surgeons cut my back open, top to bottom, to put things back together.
I almost didn't make it.
Given my injury, life is obviously difficult.
I'm so impressed with all your accomplishments in life.
I wonder where it would go, if you continued a conversation with the woman who offended you. I'm so curious to know what her intent was. I wish you could let her know how her comment hurt you.

[all-buggered-up]

when the pain is all you feel remember to feel pain prooves you''re still living. i write this expecting that tomorrow my pain will mean a quiet day and night at home my pain levels are higher than my desire for family and xmas. happy xmas everyone
..

[cass]

oh dowdy, been thinking of you. merry christmas, my friend.

[Coleen]

Here it is, 2:44am & I can't sleep thru the pain - I can only imagine how you feel, Cass. I wih you'd call me, my friend. Please try to have a good Christmas!