Page 1 of 7 1234567 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 67

Thread: ever encounter strangers who ask you questions about your wheelchair?

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Morrisville, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    149

    ever encounter strangers who ask you questions about your wheelchair?

    Just wondering if some of you guys have ever encountered strangers who ask some of the stupidest things. I guess these people don't mean any harm and are just curious, but at the same time they're also rude and don't think about what they're saying… Example:

    I'm in Panera waiting in line, and this lady in line behind me tapped me on the shoulder and goes "wow… That's a really nice wheelchair. Bet you get around pretty fast on that. How fast does it go?" I encounter people who ask me the same question about what wheelchair "how fast is a go". Before I open my lips to speak I say to myself why don't you break your fuckin neck, get in a wheelchair and find out, but the calmer side of me usually just says "I don't know… Pretty fast" to try and end the stupid conversation, and sometimes people will just blatantly ask me aloud in front of a crowd of people "so, how did you break your neck, when were you injured? Where did it happen?" And I say to myself who the hell are you… And why do you care?, But I usually just answer their questions and then I leave as fast as I can.

    I think it's really rude to ask people questions like this when you don't even know the person you're talking to. Anybody else run into these type of situations?

    It's not that the questions they ask make me feel uncomfortable, I just think it's downright rude.

  2. #2
    Senior Member DaleB's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Tidewater, VA
    Posts
    5,408
    I was having a nice meal with my wife at McCormick and Schmick's just the other day when an older man walked up to the table and pointed at me and said "Combat?"

    I replied, "No." and he said "Oh." and then just turned around and walked away.

    If I would have had my wits about me, (I was two knuckles deep into the best crap dip and pita bread appetizer on Earth), I should have said "Yes, with the bumper of a 2001 Ford Probe."

    I think I should make up a bunch of insanely crazy stories about how I got my SCI just to have on hand to whip out for douche bags likes this. That would be fun. A naked, drunk, co-Ed game of Twister would be a good one.

    __________________

    He who hears not me but the Logos will say: All is one.

  3. #3
    i think these people have not had anyone take them up on their rudeness.
    And it is plan rude as id touching a pregnant womans belly and asking personal questions.
    many time people are taken aback into shock, however the next time have an answer ready that makes them want to become invisible. sometimes crowdsourcing helps with a good come back, The reason rude people are that wa is because no one has put hem in their place. same with bullying people , once they get smacked a couple tomes and left on the ground , they think ,or remember how painful it was. they may not have developed thinking yet. but pain and embarrassment they remember
    cauda equina

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by DaleB View Post
    I(I was two knuckles deep into the best crap dip and pita bread appetizer on Earth)
    i hope you meant crab, but to each their own
    cauda equina

  5. #5
    Senior Member DaleB's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Tidewater, VA
    Posts
    5,408
    Quote Originally Posted by metronycguy View Post
    i hope you meant crab, but to each their own


    LOL!!!!


    Yeah, that's what I meant! That's what posting at 3 something in the morning after a marathon Xmas wrapping session got me!
    __________________

    He who hears not me but the Logos will say: All is one.

  6. #6
    You don't always have to open your mouth to do sumthin' stupid. Debbie was always in the habit of checking out other peoples' chairs. I picked up on that. I was having lunch with a friend yesterday and a young woman came in in an electric chair. I smiled and nodded, she did the same. A little later, I was looking at her chair out of habit and she caught me looking. She smiled but there was a little bit of "what are you looking at" in her look. Well, no chance to explain - I can only hope I didn't offend.
    Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
    - Albert Einstein

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    last house on the left
    Posts
    9,791
    Quote Originally Posted by Larsen View Post
    Just wondering if some of you guys have ever encountered strangers who ask some of the stupidest things. I guess these people don't mean any harm and are just curious, but at the same time they're also rude and don't think about what they're saying… Example:

    I'm in Panera waiting in line, and this lady in line behind me tapped me on the shoulder and goes "wow… That's a really nice wheelchair. Bet you get around pretty fast on that. How fast does it go?" I encounter people who ask me the same question about what wheelchair "how fast is a go". Before I open my lips to speak I say to myself why don't you break your fuckin neck, get in a wheelchair and find out, but the calmer side of me usually just says "I don't know… Pretty fast" to try and end the stupid conversation, and sometimes people will just blatantly ask me aloud in front of a crowd of people "so, how did you break your neck, when were you injured? Where did it happen?" And I say to myself who the hell are you… And why do you care?, But I usually just answer their questions and then I leave as fast as I can.

    I think it's really rude to ask people questions like this when you don't even know the person you're talking to. Anybody else run into these type of situations?

    It's not that the questions they ask make me feel uncomfortable, I just think it's downright rude.
    I would much prefer people asking what you call "stupid questions" to being treated like furniture. Sure, sometimes people are awkward, but you have to realize that they are going out on their own limb in some attempt at conversation with you. They don't have to, but they are making a human connection and that is always a gift, no matter what the circumstances. Imagine, if you can, what it would be like to go through life treated as a non-entity, never having anyone make eye contact with you, smile at you, or try to engage in conversation. Instead of being angry and resentful maybe you could open up to the possibility that these people are trying to interact with you.

  8. #8
    It seems like we all take those question very different. I don't like people asking and I don't think they ask for being nice, I think they ask because of curiosity. And the nicer I answer, the more tactless they continue to ask and until they ask about my sex life. And it ends up with a "It is a pity that such a nice woman like you never will get a husband". And then they leave

    I think they are rude and completely without manners.
    TH 12, 43 years post

  9. #9
    Come on guys it's christmas, cheer up The one thing I get a lot is "you outta put a motor on that thing" my reply, "you outta take the motor off your mouth" haha.
    "Life is about how you
    respond to not only the
    challenges you're dealt but
    the challenges you seek...If
    you have no goals, no
    mountains to climb, your
    soul dies".~Liz Fordred

  10. #10
    Senior Member ~Lin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    3,070
    I don't think asking about the chair was rude. I hope it's a power chair with that question though!

    Asking about your disability? Wowza rude, some people have no manners. I get a lot of questions about my service dog. It's kinda funny, because I either get comments that I don't look disabled or I'm totally crippled. No in between.*

    Once waiting at a light to cross the street, a woman came up and looked at my forearm crutches and braces and goes 'awwwww what happened to you?' seriously, long drawn out sympathetic awww. I think she thought someone my age couldn't possibly be disabled, I must have been in an accident. I muttered 'genetic thing' and turned away. People also constantly ask if I'm training my service dog for somebody, and then when I say she's mine comment that I don't look disabled. Umm, thanks? And for the other end of the spectrum, once my roommate and I were leaving the courthouse when this woman passing us turns to her friend and says 'what is he doing with that crippled girl'

    People also try to pet service dogs, without asking or even after being told no... Despite do not pet patches! I know one woman that everytime someone pets her SD she reaches over and ruffles their hair. The SD is like a wheelchair, it's an extension and touching is invasion of personal space!

    I've been trying to check out wheelchairs. I try to see what kind of chair they are. I don't let myself look long enough since I don't want to offend, and usually all I'm able to notice is the color lol.*
    Board Member of Assistance Dog Advocacy Project working in Education. Feel free to ask me any service dog questions!

    I am not paralyzed. I have a genetic connective tissue disorder with neuro complications and a movement disorder.

Similar Threads

  1. Just how much help will we encounter...
    By Juke_spin in forum Life
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 09-21-2009, 05:25 PM
  2. The Strangers
    By Le Todd in forum Life
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05-08-2008, 01:50 AM
  3. Wheelchair Questions
    By november in forum Equipment
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 05-19-2006, 04:51 PM
  4. Kindness of strangers
    By Aly in forum Life
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-16-2006, 10:49 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •