Page 3 of 7 FirstFirst 1234567 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 62

Thread: am afraid i may not be here much longer

  1. #21
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    San Diego, CA, USA
    Posts
    325
    Cass I am a bit new here, and I certainly am capable of putting my foot in my mouth. But at 69, I am also at a stage of life where I totally get what your are saying and have the greatest empathy. Can you get involved in a meditation. That has been very helpful to me during tough times. Please hang in there.
    T4 complete, 150 ft fall, 1966. Completely fused hips, partially fused knees and spine, heterotopic ossification. Unsuccessful DREZ surgery about 1990. Successful bladder augmentation using small intestine about 1992. Normal SCI IC UTI problems culminating in a hospital stay in 2001. No antibiotics or doctor visits for UTI since 2001: d-mannose. Your mileage may vary.

  2. #22
    Member claudiasandra's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Location
    Bay Harbor Island, Florida
    Posts
    37

    cass i know your pain...

    cass please you are not alone.
    think think and pray.
    i know what are you going to...but we need to find somehow a way...
    cry if you want!
    write whatever you want to write!
    just want you to know....you are not alone! we are all with you!!!

    claudia
    and sandra

  3. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by Eileen View Post
    Todd, you know I love you buddy, but your thoughts about those left behind after a suicide or even a suicide attempt are not always true, especially if it is someone you have loved who has suicided. There is nothing more painful for a child than a parent who suicides. They are left with life- long haunting questions, including "didn't she love me enough to stay?" and "how could I have prevented this." Sure, they eat, they go back to work, they put on the face of normalacy and go out into the world, but do so with a heart that is irrevocably broken, and a sense of trust that is shattered.
    I didn't mean to imply that anyone who considers suicide should do it. Many completely healthy people do it due to momentary circumstances in their lives and that is very sad.

    My focus was being adamant that a person shouldn't feel obligated to live and suffer for the benefit of others. To me, that's selfish on the part of others, not the one who suffers.

    Consider people around you who went on with their lives when you were injured. No one stops living because someone suffers.

  4. #24
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Windsor ON Canada
    Posts
    19,320
    Quote Originally Posted by Le Type Fran├žais View Post
    My focus was being adamant that a person shouldn't feel obligated to live and suffer for the benefit of others. To me, that's selfish on the part of others, not the one who suffers.
    I totally agree with this. My sister has said more than once that she'd hate to be without a sister .. but we see each other maybe two or three times per year and she doesn't have to live this life.

    On the other hand, if I had a child - never. There's an obligation and I would only stray from that if I had a terminal illness. Hard to imagine unless I was actually in that situation.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  5. #25
    Thanks for posting the article on pain Lynnifer. I read it to Dave.

  6. #26
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Windsor ON Canada
    Posts
    19,320
    Thanks! It certainly opened my eyes and I'm thankful I don't suffer the nerve pain that most do, often; although I've experienced that it worsens with age.

    I can't believe the waiting list for pain management clinics .. 700 patients long or 18 months long, yet the doctor in the story was saying that early intervention is best or else it seems you're doomed.

    P.S. Karma hates me. I posted I don't get pain often and now my feet feel like they're in blocks of ice and on fire at the same time with a 1000 needles being stabbed into them repeatedly. Doesn't happen often (lol). I blame the cold.
    Last edited by lynnifer; 10-01-2011 at 11:02 PM.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  7. #27
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    last house on the left
    Posts
    9,791
    Quote Originally Posted by Le Type Fran├žais View Post
    I didn't mean to imply that anyone who considers suicide should do it. Many completely healthy people do it due to momentary circumstances in their lives and that is very sad.

    My focus was being adamant that a person shouldn't feel obligated to live and suffer for the benefit of others. To me, that's selfish on the part of others, not the one who suffers.

    Consider people around you who went on with their lives when you were injured. No one stops living because someone suffers.
    I agree with you that suicide is a personal choice, and I did lose a good friend to a brutal suicide. Her children were told, and still believe to this day, that their mother's car broke down during a snowstorm, and I hope they never find out the truth. My feelings about her suicide are very different. I think she had an absolute right to do it if she really couldn't stand it, but I also wrestle with the fact that perhaps she just needed more psychological help with depression. The irony of her death is that she was totally ablebodied and had just WON her battle with breast cancer. Her prognosis was one of health and aging, so it was the depression that took her out. For her kids sake I am glad they just think it was a tragic accident, because the truth would be too much for them.

  8. #28
    you are all so kind and i feel like a fool for posting. i'm sure it looks like "look at me, i'm hurting, scared, alone." like i'm the only one. i really just don't know where else to turn but here.

    btw, am watching passion fish via netflix streaming. t10 w/"bad" attitude. it really is hitting home.

    jen, i'm going to read that article later.

    thank you all for listening. it really helps.

  9. #29
    Quote Originally Posted by Foolish Old View Post
    Cass, I don't do sympathy very well. But I do feel for you and respect how hard you have struggled to get to this point. I wish there was some ray of sunshine I could shine on you, I can think of no one more deserving of light and warmth. Finding that bright spot in the otherwise dark room, that single beam of warmth and comfort, is a personal challenge we all face. Your place of peace and light does exist. The trick is wanting it enough to find it and to summon the strength to get there.

    FWIW, I love you.
    FO, your post has made me cry. i keep rereading it and all the others. i do feel ppl care. w/o this site and all of you, where would i be?

  10. #30
    Cass, I'm embracing you with my strong arms, letting you melt into my soul; playing my flute softly to you, trusting you will feel its power and soothe the pain. Smell the waifs of the sage as it purifies the air around you. Sleep soundly with the knowing you are loved and caressed in body and soul by all who know you.

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 36
    Last Post: 05-03-2006, 11:44 AM
  2. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-30-2004, 08:45 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •