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Thread: Teachers behavior towards 1st Grade son

  1. #1

    Teachers behavior towards 1st Grade son

    Long time lurker here, This is only my second or third post. I've looked all over the internet and this site, but cannot find any similiar situation.

    My husband is a T12 para, and our son just started 1st grade. We attended 1st grade orientation with his new teacher, which was last Friday. On Monday, my son came home from school and told us that his teacher had lots of questions for him. She wanted to know what happened to his Dad, when, and were we married before the car accident. My husband and I were a little unnerved by this. We are no strangers, as I'm sure many here aren't, to well meaning but intrusive questions, as well as the downright rude and offensive, but we wish she would have directed her questions to us, and not our seven year old. He was not upset, just a little puzzled. We were alot more uncomfortable than he was. It would be over with, but then...

    His class is starting a unit on community, i.e. local government, etc. To start off the unit, many parents who are policemen, volunteer fireman, etc. came in to speak to the class about their role in the community. One of the parents was an emergency room physician. When his presentation was over, the teacher then said to our son "Your father was in a car accident, right? Do you have any thing to ask or add about what Dr. ______ does for the community?" Both my son, and the wife of the physician who made the presentation, told me what happened. The Dr.'s wife, who I do not know very well, actually called that evening to let me know that she and her husband were uncomfortable with the teacher's behavior and thought I should hear from them what transpired. I don't like what was done. We are not trying to hide my husband's injury and are very active in PTA and after school athletics, but I don't feel my son has to explain his Dad's injury unless he volunteers. I don't know if I should speak to his teacher, she seems somewhat hard to approach, or just let it go.

    Anyone have a simliar thing happen

  2. #2
    Senior Member mikek's Avatar
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    This is unacceptable behavior. I would take it up directly with the principal with the teacher in attendance.

  3. #3
    I agree, talk to the teacher or principal. When I go to my daughters school they have never singled her or I out. The kids are all very curious about my powerchair and if they ask I answer them.

    I'd be uncomfortable too.
    Emily, C-8 sensory incomplete mom to a 8 year old and a preschooler. TEN! years post.

  4. #4
    Please speak to the principal about this. Include the details about the doctor's wife calling you.
    The sooner after the incident the better.
    If you talk to the teacher she may get defensive and deny it. Since she is such an insensitive idiot she might even take it out on your son.

  5. #5
    She could be a devo. Speak with her first, don't go running to the principal. Shemay have a relative or someone close in a chair.

  6. #6
    I say set up a meeting with both the teacher and the principal.

    If the teacher wants to know so much she should ask you, not your 7 year old its not his job to know or fully understand the disability

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Madsen View Post
    She could be a devo. Speak with her first, don't go running to the principal. Shemay have a relative or someone close in a chair.
    Agree with this. Her level of interest in your husband's situation is a bit creepy, IMO.

  8. #8
    Senior Member djrolling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Madsen View Post
    She could be a devo. Speak with her first, don't go running to the principal. Shemay have a relative or someone close in a chair.
    What ever the situation, I think PM is right, go to the teacher. Go with your gut as to taking it higher than that after having talked to the teacher...

  9. #9

    Talking

    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Madsen View Post
    She could be a devo. Speak with her first, don't go running to the principal. Shemay have a relative or someone close in a chair.

    I respectively disagree Patrick, this is more serious than a chat with the teacher. What she said and did was so out of line.
    Maybe requesting a meeting with both teacher and principal would be good.
    My (now adult) son has a condition called alopecia areata. In third grade he lost all of his hair, lashes and brows. We told the teacher what was happening, gave her literature and she knew he was part of a study at the U of MN.
    She still asked him about his "cancer" and asked odd questions at conferences. She seemed to think he must have had terrible stress at home etc.
    Finally I did talk to the principal and we had a meeting that went well.

  10. #10
    Senior Member
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    This teacher is completely inappropriate. Your son should never be put in the position of explaining anything about your husbands injury, let alone fuel her seeking personal knowledge about if you were married before or after the injury. I would definitely speak to her or her principal so that this is stopped now, when the school year has begun.

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