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Thread: What can be done?

  1. #1

    What can be done?

    What can be done if a home caregiver (family member) mentally abuses someone with threats of abandonment and withholding care, does not respect the person's privacy and dignity, does not respect the persons needs and preferences, humiliates, insults, frightens, and treats the person like a child, and is limiting this person's efforts to regain independence?

  2. #2
    Very sad if this is the case.
    I suppose it would matter how old the person was, if they were on a program where an agency checked on them or if there were other family members to talk to about it.
    Sorry I can't answer your question.

  3. #3
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    Contact the police right away. This alleged abuser needs to be removed from the situation .. even if that means they lose a home.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by LindaT View Post
    . . . I suppose it would matter how old the person was . . .
    The person is in their 40s and believes the person doing the abuse is the only person who can help them.
    Last edited by Darryl; 10-21-2010 at 12:59 PM. Reason: Privacy

  5. #5
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    http://www.deeplyproblematic.com/201...abuse-and.html

    Wendy Garland, a New Jersey woman with disabilities, died last week after her primary caregivers, her mother and sister, abused and neglected her. Helene Hutchinson and Florence Garland have been charged "with neglect of an elderly or disabled person." Garland, who had cerebral palsy and Down syndrome, had not received medical attention in over two years. She lived and died in a dilapidated, overheated room filled with roaches, trash and feces.

    Her family waited more than two hours after discovery of her body to call 911. In an attempt to mask their abuse, her mother, sister, brother-in-law, and nephew moved furniture and carried her from the 100-degree room she died in to the front door of the air-conditioned first floor. The house was a grim scene ...
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by lynnifer View Post
    http://www.deeplyproblematic.com/201...abuse-and.html

    Wendy Garland, a New Jersey woman . . .
    Thank you for this story.

  7. #7
    The situation and person involved should be reported to Adult Protective Services. In most states, people with disabilities are in a special class (along with children and the elderly) who are served by this county or state agency. Neglect, physical abuse, financial abuse, or emotional abuse all fall into this category. Family members are not immune from these protections, nor are family caregivers.

    Health care professionals who are aware of the situation would be legally REQUIRED to report, and any other interested party (family, friends, neighbors, etc.) are allowed to report.

    Here is an excellent book detailing many peoples' stories of their experiences with abuse and neglect:

    Sticks and Stones: Disabled People’s Stories of Abuse, Defiance and Resilience

    (KLD)
    Last edited by SCI-Nurse; 10-21-2010 at 01:07 PM.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by SCI-Nurse View Post
    The situation and person involved should be reported to Adult Protective Services . . .
    (KLD)
    Thank you for this empowering information.

  9. #9
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    Sci-nurse answered everything I was going to say and then some. Report it now...do not wait.

    I am not sure if you are just a friend or what but if so you are an amazing friend, thank you for looking out for this person and I hope everything turns out ok. As a Caregiver in my forties, I must say it is at times hard work, but I would never ever ever even think of treating my husband this way. Good luck and if at all possible please keep us updated. I would love to hear a happy ending to this story.

  10. #10
    I spoke with this person today and was asked to wait before I do anything.

    I said I would wait and explained I am waiting because I don't know of anyone doing anything you want. The person agreed and said the situation is pathetic.

    I cannot begin to imagine how frustrating it must be to be so dependent on others.

    Also, coverage for nursing in this area is not good. The family member was told this person needs someone there 24 hours a day. Is this accurate when someone first comes home? This person told me today how they just want some alone time. How long will this person have to wait before getting alone time?

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