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Thread: how many try to hide pain?

  1. #11
    Senior Member mr_coffee's Avatar
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    I hide it because whats the point? Telling people you have it doesn't make it go away. If I feel I need to bring it up then I will.

    Even if you tell someone about it they still don't understand it or know what "pain" your talking about, they simply can compare it to what pain they've been in.
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  2. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by mr_coffee View Post
    I hide it because whats the point? Telling people you have it doesn't make it go away. If I feel I need to bring it up then I will.

    Even if you tell someone about it they still don't understand it or know what "pain" your talking about, they simply can compare it to what pain they've been in.
    all true. you're young like i was when i returned to work with this pain. take a word of caution: do not hide it from your boss and/or med at work. you will do everyone a disservice, most of all, you. that was my biggest work mistake for 23 yrs.

    and yeah, what is the point w/friends, co-workers? well, do they tell you they have a headache? or they broke their toe? yes, they do. but we hide our pain. why?? i'm not saying whine. i'm saying why isn't it acceptable to acknowledge, like a headache?

    silence is the enemy....green day.

  3. #13
    show your pain and you wear others out, boss/associates tire of it and you. show it at an interview and or mention it and forget the job.

    It would be nice if we could show it, it would be nice if others could understand,

    woulda coulda shoulda it sucks but no one can cope

    I weary of this existence, live my life the best and enjoy what I can and pray to die and be released.
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  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by cass View Post
    all true. you're young like i was when i returned to work with this pain. take a word of caution: do not hide it from your boss and/or med at work. you will do everyone a disservice, most of all, you. that was my biggest work mistake for 23 yrs.

    and yeah, what is the point w/friends, co-workers? well, do they tell you they have a headache? or they broke their toe? yes, they do. but we hide our pain. why?? i'm not saying whine. i'm saying why isn't it acceptable to acknowledge, like a headache?

    silence is the enemy....green day.

    I used the word "whine" when I shouldn't have. It just never goes away so eventually it sounds like you are "whining" to even the most understanding friends. I tell my really good friends and close family the details one time and after that it usually only comes up if I am having a bad day. That's usually going to mean I can't participate in life at all that day, so I will tell those close to me so they at least know why.

    I guess I don't hide it on the really bad days because I can't.
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  5. #15
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    I never had a problem with bosses or co-workers. I didn't try to hide the pain but I didn't complain all the time either. They could see it and quite frankly they were all great about it i.e., having to go to the doctor, time off, surgery, etc., etc. Some even had the same things going on or knew someone who did. The one thing I will say is that I did tire of hearing myself talk about it even when asked. After awhile you just accept it, at least I did. And honestly I would rather talk about something else. Or, in other words...talk about things that interest everyone not just myself say, if in a group. So, nowdays, I just answer them WHEN ASKED and I keep it short. If I can't do something I will speak up. Or, if having a good day, I will tell people I am okay for the day. Family members and friends definitely understand.

  6. #16
    I think people can sense when your in pain sometimes! I've had it for almost 8 yrs now and it's NEVER let up. Yeah I can walk some but it hurts like hell!!!!!! ao when they see me they know so most end up asking and it's like duh.............

  7. #17
    I feel like people get sick of listening to me too. Sometimes we just need to vent so others can just maybe understand just a little of what we're feeling... No other person except us, who have CP understand it deeper than probably the doctors. Alas our cause is small, they see us and think we're fine, but dont understand what we are feeling.

    Just remember this, we can not control our situations, but we can choose how we react and treat those situations. Keep your head up, its all in our heads right?! haha!
    I am just a man with a heart and sinful hands.

  8. #18
    Senior Member da lurker's Avatar
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    I've had doctors doubt my pain.

    I tend to befriend the people who accept the fact that I'm always in pain and I have to remember all the times I've doubted others assertions of some sort of calamity or the other
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  9. #19
    Senior Member JustinB's Avatar
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    I hide it as much as I can from my daughters. They don't need to know. My wife knows when I'm in pain, and will distract them.

  10. #20
    i get the feeling ppl think i'm saying something i'm not. i'm not saying, yeah, mention it every day. i'm not even saying bring it up once a month or w/e. i am saying your boss and medical at work should be aware of the issue. i spent 23 yrs hiding it from them and when it got really bad, they thought my attitude sucked.

    that wasn't it. had i been forthright w/them earlier, i would have avoided probs. never have i said bring it up in interviews as i think someone commented on. of course not.

    i am talking about the 70 hr work weeks i did. i am talking about drawing a line and saying my job description is 40, not 70. i was literally told by a 2nd level that all engineers at my level were expected to work at least 50 hr work weeks (no, not in job description, not legal, blah blah). i am saying i did not stand my ground and say no. i hid the pain, worked the 70 hr work weeks to be like everybody else. it's wrong.

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