Rafiella ~ good luck with the management of your caregivers. Yes, you can hire / fire anyone you choose. Another way to solve the challenges of care management is to become more and more independent. Little by little, piece by piece. I think of the challenges of SCI as a giant reclamation project, gaining a piece of my life back, day after day, etc.

And to echo Betheny I've come to realize more and more the monumental impact SCI, and probably any injury incurred disability, has on the entire family. I know that here, at Craig, we try to spend equal amounts of time, love, energy with the family as we do with the patient. And as a former patient, now peer mentor, etc., I try to coach the patients into understanding that "As they go, their families go".

What I mean is that unfortunately these injuries, our moods that are reflected by them, and the visual / emotional baggage they come with are like neon lights to the outside world, especially family. Do you ever notice that when you're in a crappy mood, with a crappy attitude (we all have those days) that everyone around you, who's trying to comfort, support and take care of you, is then also in a crappy mood. But as soon as you're bright and sunny, the same reaction follows. It's a very interesting dynamic, try it, privately and publicly, it's an interesting exercise / experiment.

My guess is that your mom's mood, temprament, etc. is probably largely a reflective mirror of yours. If you're positive, she's positive. Negative = negative, etc. The demands of dealing with these injuries puts everyone on a very taut physical and emotional thread. The more you, we, the injured, can try and ease the tension the easier, happier and more manageable (moms, caregivers, sons, daughter, spouses, alike) our world becomes.

Have a good day, onward and upward!