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Thread: divorce

  1. #1

    divorce

    my wife and i maybe getting a divorce. i love her so im trying to let her go. i know that it will be hard to move on for two resonse i love her and i'm in a chair. not many women want a paralyzed man i can still do alot of things like walk a little. but i just dont want anyone but her. what can i do?
    Last edited by goredeisel; 04-19-2010 at 06:55 PM.
    keep your head up!

  2. #2
    What kind of problems are you having..are they fixable? Counseling?
    Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get.

  3. #3
    Senior Member djrolling's Avatar
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    I am not sure what to say....It is supposed to be for better or worse...I do not know why she wants to go...If it is injury related or what....So it is kind of hard to tell you what you might try...You might not want to put it all out here either...I sure hope you can work it out....You do not want to try and make her stay but I think you want her to know that you love her and want her to stay....Knowing so little, hard to say anything beyond that...

  4. #4
    Senior Member ColonusFan's Avatar
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    Work at it...

    Dear Gore,

    You and the Mrs. have something really special. No matter how bad life gets sometimes it is best to say "I'm sorry". Work at your all's marriage, ask your wife out on a date to work things out, so you can tell each other what is bothering you. Some times a picnic lunch or dinner can be that special thing to let each other share their feelings, fears, and frustrations.

    For the two of you to have worked so hard post injury and to now just throw in the towel that just has this guy with his hands in the air wondering

    Every one over time will have some doubts in any relationship, but I think you two have what it takes to find that once upon a time a go "spark of love". Intimacy is much more than a physical touch or arousal of passion.

    Wishing you two reconciliation,

  5. #5
    Plus you got a 1 year old child as I remember too? You both should really try and work things out. From reading her posts under caregiving it sounds like she was very receptive to trying to help you as much as she possibly could. Think hard about your own actions about things you do and say. For us spinal cord injured folks it is easy for us to be negitive (sometimes without even knowing it) especially when we are fairly newly injured as you are. I know I myself was really negitive throughout most of my Twenties after I got injured until I really burried myself in a project as a small business man and then did not have the time for any negitivity and was forced to put a smile on my face everyday.

    Now on to your wifes side of things. She has to understand that SCI is what it is and there is only so much you can do physically depending on the level and the severity of your injury. Heck with me I never moved a muscle again below my upper chest down after my injury in 1981, but I've done well with what I have left. You reach a point where there really is nothing more you can do to go any further with what you have left in your function and your wife has to understand and except that. If she cannot, well then it is just not going to work out. If she is trying to push you all the time to be "normal" and there is just no being "normal" due to the severity of your injury it is only gonna produce frusteration on both your parts.

    Anyhow, good luck and I hope you both can work things out.
    Last edited by Curt Leatherbee; 04-19-2010 at 12:45 AM.
    "Life is about how you
    respond to not only the
    challenges you're dealt but
    the challenges you seek...If
    you have no goals, no
    mountains to climb, your
    soul dies".~Liz Fordred

  6. #6
    Moderator jody's Avatar
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    sorry for what you are going through. a lot of ccc members have been them. I think most have grown to be content and even happy again eventually.

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