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Thread: She doesn't want to be seen with a wheeler in public...

  1. #1

    She doesn't want to be seen with a wheeler in public...

    Last month my cousin who lives in San Diego visited me in Atlanta and I met a few of her girlfriends--one whom recently moved the metro area from San Diego. We all had dinner together. My cousin asked me if I'd be willing to help her out by showing her the city and helping her get acclimated since she is having some very hard times financially. No problem. This woman is in her early forties and is a personal trainer and a bit of an entrepreneur is somewhat high-minded--though she is basically broke. She reminds me of a Hyacinth Bucket from the BBC's "Keeping Up Appearances" but younger and better looking. She seemed like a pleasant enough person but one of my cousin's other girlfriends obviously didn't care for her because she thought her to be a fake.

    I invited this person to attend a play at the Fox Theatre with me last month and she happily accepted since she is into the arts. I picked her up (she doesn't own a car and lives with a roomie in an overpriced townhouse) and we got to the theatre it was raining slightly. She walked faster and a little ahead of me. I figured it was because it was raining. As the play ended, I decided it was best to leave right then to avoid the rush out the door. I rolled into the lobby and she stopped to buy a playbill. She looked at me and said, "oh you don't have to wait for me I will just meet you at the car." Uhhhh, it was wet out and we were parked in the back lot. Why would I roll out there by myself? First sign.

    Skipping some other small noticeable antics, I'll get to the "meat." I picked her up yesterday (she was off, she works at this retail store) and we drive back to my place because she needed to use one of my laptops (she doesn't have a computer AND her cell phone is off). She was made up more than I expected. She asked me during the drive "do you ever think about what people think when they see you out and about in your chair?" I looked at ther and said "They probably think I'm broke." After she used the laptop, I needed to run to the store to get something and she came with me because I was also going to the movies and invited her. In the store, she said, "I'll just go look around, I'll find you when you're done." Um, okay.

    We leave the store and head to the theatre. I paid for the movie. She buys some popcorn. We get into the theatre and she says, "Okay, I'm going to sit up top, I can't sit down here (handicap row) but first I need to run to the bathroom. You can hold my popcorn and I'LL EVEN LET YOU HAVE SOME." WTF??? I asked her if something was wrong with her eyes. She said no, but she didn't want to sit that close. She sat about six rows up to my right. I have never in all my years, pre or post crip, gone to the movies with a woman (and I've been A LOT) and they not sit with me--I mean we did come together. I texted a f couple of my female friends about it and they were even like "WTF??" After the flick was over, I rolled out of the theatre--I didn't even wait on her. We got to the lobby and I was a lil' steamed. She was oblivious. That shit she did was very rude in my opinion. I figured I'd try her one more time and decided to go to Best Buy. We get to Best Buy and inside the store, she does the same thing "I'm going to look around a bit and I'll find you when you are done."
    I kept my cool in the car but I casually mentioned how some people have the inability to adapt to new people and surroundings (she only wishes to associate with "upscale" people.

    Okay, it was confirmed. This broke broad apparently doesn't want to be seen with a guy in a wheelchair in public. I never thought I'd encounter a grown adult who could be so damned silly. I left a message for my cousin last night telling her her friend was going to be on her own because I'm not going to put up with that bullshit. I'm just amazed at how shallow some folks are. I'm the established one with assets dammit! Anyway, that's my rant. Lesson learned.

  2. #2

    You are right, Wheelieboy...that was Rude with a capital R!!!

    Firstly, I have seen pictures of the inside of the Fox Theatre...NICCCCEEEE...

    Secondly, I have to agree...when you go to the movies together, you sit together, unless you both have agreed beforehand...(meeting separate friends or something)...

    Glad you figured it out now...and it's HER loss...I'm thinking she needed an extra friend from the sound of it...sigh...

    Take care, and try to put this behind you...


  3. #3
    next time ask to take her some where out the way. drive up to the front and tell her i'll let you out here and go park the car. i'm sure she will be happy about that. then once she goes in go back home and laugh the rest of the night.
    Street Dreamz c.c. maryland

  4. #4
    Senior Member Van Quad's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Vancouver, BC, Canada
    She's a personal trainer; nuff said. She is all about outside appearances and what people think about her. And a user to boot. Disengage immediately.

  5. #5
    In my 55 years with an SCI, I have never encountered a woman who was so low in self-esteem that she viewed being seen with a wheeler akin to having a huge pimple on the end of her nose. But, I guess there is one.
    You will find a guide to preserving shoulder function @

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  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by cripple4life View Post
    next time ask to take her some where out the way. drive up to the front and tell her i'll let you out here and go park the car. i'm sure she will be happy about that. then once she goes in go back home and laugh the rest of the night.
    Funny you mentioned this, because I was contemplating doing this at the movie theatre but I know my "bestest" cousin would never forgive me. There won't be a next time. I have 20ish female friends with more class and maturity.

    Teena, yes you are correct, she does need a friend, but it's not going to be me. Even without the use of my legs, I have my "ducks in a row" and I am younger than she is. I should have listened to my cousin's other girlfriend who just met her that weekend. Women know trouble when they see it in other women.

    VanQ - Exact same thing another of my female friends said today along with the issue of low self-esteem. You guys are right on.

    Honestly, I was so pissed off about the entire situation yesterday I couldn't sleep. Didn't close my eyes until 430am this morning. Yeah, it really really bugged me.

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Alberta, Canada
    haha... what a bonehead this chick is.

    She fails at life.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by NorthQuad View Post
    haha... what a bonehead this chick is.

    She fails at life.
    What he said.

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Denver, Colorado
    Northquad is right on... she is a bonehead!!! Wheel baby wheel as fast as you can away from this woman! She is a loser.

  10. #10
    Sounds like a classic "user" who is also incredibly shallow, self centered, and insensitive. A toxic relationship to avoid. Dump her, and tell your cousin why.


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