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Thread: Being mad

  1. #1

    Being mad

    I am not sure what is wrong with me but i am so damn mad/frustrated with my life. Moody, crying, anger fits...I have never had the anger problem, maybe i have but it manifested itself in other ways. I am so mad that i have no life, no job, no money, crappy crap body and no man. All my friends have kids, grandkids, nice houses and cars...ect. I just to take things one day at a time but i am so over it all. Any suggestions on what to do that dont involve a pill or a shrink?
    “If everybody's thinking alike, somebody isn't thinking.” Gen. Patton

  2. #2
    Figure out where you want to get in life.

    Take an honest, potentially brutal, assessment of where you are now. (But don't spend time pondering the "if only" scenarios. Acknowledge that you screwed up if they come to mind, then move on.)

    Figure out the first actionable step from here to your destination.

    Take it.

    Figure out the next actionable step, repeat.
    ...it's worse than we thought. it turns out the people at the white house are not secret muslims, they're nerds.

  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    I agree with everything Steven says, nothing like a bit of direct action to make you feel more in control.

    In a more general sense I recommend reading a lot of science-based books. Cosmology, astronomy, biology, try and get a sense of just how massive the universe is, nothing like a true appreciation of how insignificant the individual is to put your individual problems into perspective. Your ego will give you a hell of a time if you give it too much attention. Don't compare yourself to your neighbour, compare yourself to the planets.

    For me, when you think about how utterly astounding the universe is, the joy of simply being a part of it all can be effective at combating the frustration of not having that thing or person you want in your life. And remember, everybody on the planet wishes their life was a little bit better.

  4. #4

    Ain't Fair Blues

    Hi Suzy Q,
    I think you may have a stubborn case of what we call "The Ain't Fair Blues." They can creep up on you because a lot of things haven't gone right, they can hit you out of no where because of an incident that happens, a song you hear, whatever cue you can think of, and they are consuming.
    Steven's comments are right on point. A "shrink" would suggest a similar plan of action. The key is wanting to take the action and see it through....TOUGH, TOUGH, TOUGH!!!
    Are you Spinal Cord Injured? Maybe you could find a support group for SCI at your local hospital or maybe your primary care doctor could suggest a support group that isn't SCI specific, but possibly a living with a disability group. Do you have a local independent living center that might help you find support or help.
    Don't give up on yourself, take baby steps and if you back slide, try again.
    All the best,
    GJ

  5. #5
    Suzie, you've been through a lot and continue to deal with a lot. There are no easy answers. My only bit of advice would be to find your passion and surround yourself with it.


  6. #6
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    Those "perfect lives" that you think you see everywhere else are probably far from perfect for a least a few of the couples. Within the boundaries you mention (financial and physical) you get to plan your day without being expected to be a free liftetime babysitter for grandkids. I know a couple of women who, while they love their grandchildren, wish that their own children would spend more time parenting and less time passing them off on the older generation. Just a thought......

  7. #7

  8. #8
    I agree with everything. thanks, i am trying to do the best i can right now. On a positive note i was asked by a neighbor to take him to the ER. While i was sitting there waiting on him it occurred to me that i had not been in a hospital ER in years other than for myself LOL. Of course every yahoo in the county was there and i heard an interesting story about a rash. It was all good. LOL I got a chuckle out of it anyways. He was there for poison ivy.
    “If everybody's thinking alike, somebody isn't thinking.” Gen. Patton

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Eileen View Post
    Those "perfect lives" that you think you see everywhere else are probably far from perfect for a least a few of the couples. Within the boundaries you mention (financial and physical) you get to plan your day without being expected to be a free liftetime babysitter for grandkids. I know a couple of women who, while they love their grandchildren, wish that their own children would spend more time parenting and less time passing them off on the older generation. Just a thought......
    Eileen, it took me a long time to figure that out for myself as well. Being injured at 15, I was so ignorant and naïve not having lived an adult life able-bodied, so I assumed incorrectly that everyone around me had those so-called perfect lives just because they didn't have a spinal cord injury.

    Well, almost 13 years later, I can attest that I may as well have a better life than some of those people I assumed had perfect ones. What you see is not always what is, especially when darker things and drama are often deep into people's private lives.

    Am I saying I wouldn't want to be able-bodied? Of course not! I'm just saying that a lot of things can destroy one's quality or perception of life and it doesn't take an SCI to do that.


  10. #10
    Well said, Le Type Francais
    GJ

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