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Thread: Burned out

  1. #1

    Angry Burned out

    I don't have much to say about it totally burned out with everything. I've had this stupid sore since December and it doesn't look any better. Been in bed the whole time mostly, just starting to get up for a couple hours a day with clearance from my doctor because I'm pressure mapped perfectly on my seat cushions but even still, getting back in bed is miserable.. And now I have to deal with seizures.. What the hell is up with that. And I start to go into a hyperbaric oxygen chamber next week. Oh yay, I can't wait. What ever, it's going to drive me nuts to be stuck in a little room for two hours a day what happened to all my friends.. I have 128 friends on Facebook and I never see any of them except for maybe a couple who are caregivers. They're the only people I ever see anymore. My life is miserable and I'm just tired of it.. Nothing is going right. Everything tends to go wrong, one day at a time.. Every day it's something new and nothing has really gone right for the past couple of months. I'm lonely and bored all the time. It's been months since I've had someone who would lay down next to me and watch TV or something. I just don't get it, I wonder what I did that was so bad in my past life. oh yeah, and my mom wants me to move into a nursing home even though she doesn't do very much for me, I feel bad asking her for anything. I don't know what I'm going to do. Sometimes I wish I didn't survive my accident,that everybody else's life would be much easier if I didn't make it. What ever, it doesn't matter at this point.
    C-5/6, 7-9-2000
    Scottsdale, AZ

    Make the best out of today because yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come. Nobody knows that better than those of us that have almost died from spinal cord injury.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    connecticut
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    Hey RB,

    No advice or suggestions, just saying that I am listening.

    I spent about 6 weeks on bedrest and THAT was driving me up the wall, I can;t really imagine since December. Glad to hear that the pressure mapping is good, sometimes I wonder if 8 months in bed have made NO difference, why not just get up, if it isn;t going to heal laying down. But I know that isn;t the right decision medically.

    Sorry you are going through all this ..... hoping you can enjoy the fall. I am in New England, and it will start getting colder soon, but I know that Jen had mentioned that the weather in your part of the country is just getting bearable! I have a hard time imagining summer to be the "inclement" weather!
    T7-8 since Feb 2005

  3. #3
    You need to stay off it more or it will not ever heal to the point when you can sit up again. I know it is tough but if you had stayed off it the first 2 or 3 months, then you would have already been healed. Sorry but the flesh is weak and your trying it too much.

    ~ Peace

  4. #4
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Windsor ON Canada
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    19,320
    The oxygen chamber sounds like an excellent option! Are you clear of infection now? It won't work otherwise and will send you into another spiral of feeling bad (I would know).

    Chin up - have hope that the HBO therapy works! There's always someone around CareCure. You're not alone.
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  5. #5
    Getting on it wasn't what was keeping it open The bone was infected and I had a little bit of an infection in general that I'm taking care of. I seriously spentan entire 6 1/2 months in bed without getting up and it barely made a difference. You should see the pressure map screenThere is rarely any pressure there. I wish I could've copied it so you guys can see a. Next time I'll have to take a picture And in order to keep my sanity somewhat there,I need to be able to get up a little bitor I will go completely crazy. I've already lost my caring for life as it is.I just can't, well I guess I can, don't want to deal with it anymore. My back is killing me laying in this bed even though I have the right mattress and everything like that on it.Oh well I guess I'm screwed either way so what does it matter. I'm not sure why I bother anyways.It's just going to go bad again.
    C-5/6, 7-9-2000
    Scottsdale, AZ

    Make the best out of today because yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come. Nobody knows that better than those of us that have almost died from spinal cord injury.

  6. #6
    I hear you Ry, that would drive me crazy.
    C5/6 incomplete

    "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

  7. #7
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Windsor ON Canada
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    19,320
    Sometimes it takes many tries. I've had some sort of wound on my foot(feet) since age 17 and I'm going to turn 37 next month. They're just getting all sorted now.

    Pressure sores are multi-factored ... never just one thing causing them. It seems you've got the pressure mapping worked out ... what about the quality of your blood? Had a nutritional screen lately? Thyroid, diabetes? Blood counts?

    Sometimes it takes many stabs to heal them ... then come full circle and try again. Just don't give up. Of course you feel bad ... I remember sitting in a pyschologist's office crying and blubbering about how I was so useless I couldn't even heal a wound ... it's natural to feel bad after so many months of patient waiting/healing with nothing to show for it.

    Stress doesn't help. This isn't your fault ... and don't let the medical people convince you it is!

    I've heard you try wound vacs, IV antibiotics and now HBO. Have you tried electrical stim? There are still many things to try .. do your research and stay ahead of the doctors!
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  8. #8
    Déj* Vu Again, that was a potential seizureaccording to my neurologist
    when I was in the hospital after having my seizures, the nurses said that a lot of their patience I would remember that if you did I remember that that would. LOL, hope your mom doesn't get done their time I wouldn't remember, I will. I remember I'll try. Next
    C-5/6, 7-9-2000
    Scottsdale, AZ

    Make the best out of today because yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come. Nobody knows that better than those of us that have almost died from spinal cord injury.

  9. #9
    and oh yeah, if I had gotten yourbefore you did you could of got here without me.
    C-5/6, 7-9-2000
    Scottsdale, AZ

    Make the best out of today because yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come. Nobody knows that better than those of us that have almost died from spinal cord injury.

  10. #10
    HI RB

    I have no words of wisdom. been riding the line for 5 years of declining ability and pain at 8-10 all the time. I understand where you're at. Hang in there you bring much to many of us here.

    Peace

    Bill

    All that I am is all gone

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