Page 5 of 6 FirstFirst 123456 LastLast
Results 41 to 50 of 54

Thread: Trying to understand C 7 Quad

  1. #41
    I think the nine-year-old should be told. My youngest son was in kindergarten when his older brother was hurt. He dealt with it very well and was able to talk to his brother, make dozens of get well cards and feel like he was helping. I think the cards did a lot of good for both boys. Plus, my two younger boys were about the only people in the world who treated their brother as just that, their brother. There was no walking on egg shells for them, no pulling punches while playing video games, if his hair looked like crap they told him and all laughed about it. Family can be good for the soul.
    Ugh, I've been kissed by a dog!
    Get some hot water, get some iodine ...
    -- Lucy VanPelt

  2. #42
    First, let me begin by assuring you all, I appreciate your input. Our situation is different than one where the child actually lives with/sees his father. We are 3000 miles away and phone calls came every couple of weeks. I have spoken with his dad, as he can talk between vent breaths. He doesn't want his son to see him this way and wants time ot get stronger. We can only visit once within the next few months and it should be at a time when he's not feeling "sick" ALL the time. He's fighting and infection, is trying to wean from the vent(doing pretty well), and sleeping a lot.
    I plan to teach him about SCI, how it changes, but does not end life. I'm determined to be positive and reassuring to his dad through all this. I believe in hope, for return and/or just adapting, either way. To visit now, would scare my son and give him a bleak view on his dad's condition. No matter what I "explain" he will have that picture of his dad in his mind.
    To tell him now, would just cause him feel the pain and worry we (his family) are all going through. With out being able to have his dad reassure him he is ok (relatively), he will just hurt for him. He will not experience guilt or anger for not knowing right away.......he's 9....has little concept of time.....and won't ever be aware of exactly when the accident occurred.
    Does that help everyone understand my decision better?
    Last edited by healing; 06-12-2009 at 10:17 PM.

  3. #43
    [reflist][/reflist]
    Quote Originally Posted by healing View Post
    First, let me begin by assuring you all, I appreciate your input. Our situation is different than one where the child actually lives with/sees his father. We are 3000 miles away and phone calls came every couple of weeks. I have spoken with his dad, as he can talk between vent breaths. He doesn't want his son to see him this way and wants time ot get stronger. We can only visit once within the next few months and it should be at a time when he's not feeling "sick" ALL the time. He's fighting and infection, is trying to wean from the vent(doing pretty well), and sleeping a lot.
    I plan to teach him about SCI, how it changes, but does not end life. I'm determined to be positive and reassuring to his dad through all this. I believe in hope, for return and/or just adapting, either way. To visit now, would scare my son and give him a bleak view on his dad's condition. No matter what I "explain" he will have that picture of his dad in his mind.
    To tell him now, would just cause him feel the pain and worry we (his family) are all going through. With out being able to have his dad reassure him he is ok (relatively), he will just hurt for him. He will not experience guilt or anger for not knowing right away.......he's 9....has little concept of time.....and won't ever be aware of exactly when the accident occurred.
    Does that help everyone understand my decision better?
    Your Son? Isn't he his fathers son too? 3,000 miles is a blink today. Go ahead and teach SCI. PM me when you figure it out. Do you know or relate to any SCI people? Yes people. Not contagious. Conveinet outlook.
    Get honest here. Do or don"t you wan't your son near his Dad because Daddy is sick and facing probably the greatest tragedy in his life?
    I am sorry for being so harsh. Really harsh.
    When Mikey, (my son) had his accident 5 years ago I had the wonderful nurses, Boston Medical Center, keep a chair, emesis tray and ice for the back of necks for those loving individuals who had the courage to visit.

  4. #44
    Your Son? Isn't he his fathers son too? 3,000 miles is a blink today. Go ahead and teach SCI. PM me when you figure it out. Do you know or relate to any SCI people? Yes people. Not contagious. Conveinet outlook.
    Get honest here. Do or don"t you wan't your son near his Dad because Daddy is sick and facing probably the greatest tragedy in his life?
    I am sorry for being so harsh. Really harsh.
    When Mikey, (my son) had his accident 5 years ago I had the wonderful nurses, Boston Medical Center, keep a chair, emesis tray and ice for the back of necks for those loving individuals who had the courage to visit.

    Harsh...pretty angry if you ask me...3000 miles is a bit more than a blink if you don't have money for an airline ticket...or a hotel and meals...and then transportation...oh, forgot...need to ask the boss for time off work...and then worry about paying bills cause you won't have a paycheck when you get back...all because "daddy" is in the hospital...It is not about COURAGE to visit...listen to what healing has said...the child has no concept of time...hasn't even missed his dads phone call and she is his mother...and knows what is best for this child...the dad even said he wanted to wait for a visit...geez,

  5. #45

    yes I'm angry this shouldn't have happened
    How do YOU know her financial
    FMLA
    Travlers assistance program your right USA citizen
    I stayed for free in my sons room
    Did she say son has not missed "Daddy's phone calls
    I remember being 9 years old & denied opinion about having to leave my Grandmother's wake. My Aunt Ginny Thought I looked sad. She died on my 9th Birthday' 10/24/1965. I didn't wan't to leave that night...it was 7:30 p.m.
    a eloquent member quoted...I don't remember what you did or said but I remember how it made me feel.
    You are right though. In the end "healing" is Mom. She will make the decission she must. I applaud her for posting for others opinions. That initself is courage!

  6. #46
    Quote Originally Posted by mckeownp View Post
    [reflist][/reflist]

    Your Son? Isn't he his fathers son too? 3,000 miles is a blink today. Go ahead and teach SCI. PM me when you figure it out. Do you know or relate to any SCI people? Yes people. Not contagious. Conveinet outlook.
    Get honest here. Do or don"t you wan't your son near his Dad because Daddy is sick and facing probably the greatest tragedy in his life?
    I am sorry for being so harsh. Really harsh.
    When Mikey, (my son) had his accident 5 years ago I had the wonderful nurses, Boston Medical Center, keep a chair, emesis tray and ice for the back of necks for those loving individuals who had the courage to visit.
    My wording is not yours to criticize. You have no right to lash out at me regarding my decision. You know next to nothing about our situation, before or after the accident. There are many factors involved.
    Secondly, I didn't ask for opinions on whether to tell him or not. His father and I decided that already.
    I came to this site looking for information about the injury to help my ex and his family, by choice. I could easily have sit back and been detached but, I do care.

  7. #47

    3 Months later, off the vent, where to go next? Help!

    It's been some time now. So happy to say the vent, trach, and G tube are gone. He worked hard to wean from it. We finally had a visit and it went well. I was glad to be able to help and tried to provide comfort and encouragement.
    He's at Spaulding Rehab but it's time for him to go somewhere else?? I think he's fully covered by WC. The family is looking to send him to the Center for Comprehensive Services in Raynham, Ma. I'm a little confused, as this is a facility for brain injury therapy. They are listed as CARF but traditionally are a Mentor ABI center. They say they will provide him with any rehab services he needs but he seems to be their first severe SCI case. Does anyone know anything about these places? Any other suggestions??

  8. #48
    The Center for Comprehensive Services in Raynham (part of the Mentor ABI chain) is CARF accredited only as a Brain Injury Residential Rehabilitation Program. It is not accredited as an acute rehab program, for either TBI or SCI. It is a residential post-acute TBI rehab program where 6 people live in a group home and participate in therapy. If they have little experience with SCI I would assume that this is only a TBI program. He will likely not have much in common with the other people there unless he also has a significant TBI that you have not mentioned.

    Has he achieved all of his goals for rehab at Spaulding? Do you think he needs more acute rehab? Is there some discharge plan other than for him to live long-term in an institutional setting (rather than get his own place with attendant care)???

    (KLD)

  9. #49
    The center director returned my email inquiry saying that the also do SCI rehab. I'm not so convinced. It sounds like this is fairly new to them.
    Keith is technically a C4, not sure whether complete or incomplete. I don't know why they are having him moved from Spaulding. Until 3 weeks ago he was on the vent, had C-Diff, and wasn't eating well due to stomache problems. He is eating and breathing fine now, but is also just now getting the proper PT. WHy would they want to move him? Does it sound like they're giving up on him? Where SHOULD he be going? Help...

  10. #50
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    connecticut
    Posts
    8,272
    Hi healing, I just saw this. How did the visit w/ your son and his Dad do?

    Have they made some decisions as to where he is in rehab? Is he going home and doing out patient rehab, or still in a hospital setting?

    I would certainly push for him to be in a setting that specializes in sci, not one that just does it as an aside.
    T7-8 since Feb 2005

Similar Threads

  1. Quad Rugby team invades Lynchburg College
    By Max in forum Recreation, Sports, Travel, & Hobbies
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-29-2007, 10:48 PM
  2. Should i move to quad cane(s)?
    By mr_coffee in forum Exercise & Recovery
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 02-24-2006, 03:44 PM
  3. Personal SCI Pages
    By Wise Young in forum Web Links
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 03-30-2003, 11:58 PM
  4. Have quad bike, will travel
    By antiquity in forum Ability & Disability News
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 12-17-2002, 04:11 PM
  5. Rattlers ready to Knock & Roll - NASCAR? No. It's quad rugby!
    By BirdeR in forum Recreation, Sports, Travel, & Hobbies
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 03-05-2002, 08:26 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •