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Thread: What do you do when your family member won't - or can't - get medical help?

  1. #1

    What do you do when your family member won't - or can't - get medical help?

    Since this has come up in a few topics both here and in 'Care' lately, thought I'd throw out the above question. To clarify just a little, by 'won't' I mean being stubborn, or in denial that help is needed; by 'can't' I mean is unable to make the logic jump needed to see that they need medical care (ie, my situation with Matt who, because of his brain injury is incapable of making that logic jump).

    Trying to balance this issue with my son has been one of my most trying tasks to get through; on the one hand, he wants to 'take charge' of himself and his care; on the other, because of memory and logic 'wiring' circuits being blown in his brain, he is incapable of doing so without supervision.

    I also know from some recent posts that some of you are dealing with rather stubborn spouses/significant others, who for one reason or another won't seek medical help when they need it.

    Anyone like to share how they accomplish the goal?

    Tough times don't last - tough people do.

  2. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    The Middle of Nowhere
    Paul is one of the most stubborn people you will ever meet, I think. Sometimes I wonder just how much he doesn't tell us about, and just puts up with. The role of myself and mom though is interesting, because he listens more to me than he does mom -- they're too much alike. But I have to sort of be the "police" sometimes before I can get him to do what he needs to do, whether it's taking meds or not doing something he's not supposed to, or what. I don't like having to be like that, but I don't like to see him hurting himself either because he's busy trying to prove God knows what to God knows who.

  3. #3
    My mom just constantly nags at me and eventually, if the problem doesn't go away [after maybe a week or so], I'll call whoever I need to and go through with what needs to be done; I probably fit under the stubborn category.


  4. #4
    Senior Member martha's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Texas hallelujah!
    Most of the time I can't get him to do anything when he gets into that stubborn mode. Nagging seldom works and frankly I'm tired of always being the police though it's a role I guess we all have to play. This time I used lies and trickery.

  5. #5
    I have had this problem quite a few times myself. My boyfriend is really stubborn, and has the "I dont need to go to the doctor, Im fine" attitude. I told him that he was scaring me and that I dont think he is fine. He finally decided to make an appointment. I know a lot of the stubbornness comes from being too busy to make the appointment or whatever, but still, I feel that health issues should come before school or whatever. That is one of our big arguments lately. I guess it worked out this time, so hopefully I found a good method...make him feel guilty for worrying me

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