View Poll Results: are you ok with your injury?

Voters
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  • has it helped you?

    13 5.65%
  • has it ruined your life?

    104 45.22%
  • did it save your life?

    13 5.65%
  • are you just ok with it and keeping on?

    100 43.48%
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Thread: how many really think they deserved this injury or benefitted by it?

  1. #111
    Senior Member rdf's Avatar
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    My accident was mainly my own damned fault. When I realized I wasn't going to be up and at 'em anytime soon, my dad had some good words for me. He said you've always been eager and more than ready to accept a challenge bobby, since you were just a babe. And you've never shied away from one, you've accepted and triumphed over most all of them. So I looked at my new sci as a challenge to overcome...and I have overcame it in some ways, and now only wish I could overcome it by actually being not paralyzed again. Doubt that's in the cards.

    So it's a challenge to me to this day, and I view it as something to conquer emotionally, mentally and physically, each and every day. I usually do ok, and god knows I'm lucky compared to many spinal cord injured who have it so much worse than do so many of us.

    And I met the girl I love, love more than any of the others that came before, because I am in a wheelchair. If not for being in a chair, we wouldn't have met.

    So I'll try to squeeze some happiness out of each day, and I usually succeed. Then you can try to give back to others less fortunate.

    Watching the workings of the world leads me to believe that bad things will and do happen to good people, and to bad people, and to good/bad people. It just does, there is no religious or scientific explanation available to anybody about why this is so. It just is. Apples fall from trees, people get broken, and life goes on. 50 years from now, nobody will even know we existed - or care.

    Communing with nature via the sea or the mountains or the clouds or the moon or anything that might give one solace can soothe most any troubled soul, and I hope everybody has a special place they can go to to just let it be, for some peace, for at least a little while, indoors or out.

    I love you all, your stories and your courage and your faith and your loneliness and your sadness and love for others even though life with sci can be such a hindrance - most of us muddle through 'til the end, which is surely the best thing to do, considering this Earthly life is probably the only one we get.
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  2. #112
    Senior Member DaleB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeus
    Or, as a 7-year-old, you know there'll be a cure by the time you're in high school. O.K., it'll be university. At least by the time I start work, yes? By the time I'm 30...

    Chris.
    i can't even begin to imagine.
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  3. #113
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    I always thought I conquered the inability to walk mentally. I can deal with the fact that I can't walk upstairs or control all my bodily functions. I live a life no one thought was possible for me. I am living my vocational life in the corporate world as a Marketing Manager for the Asia-Pacific region (just Australia atm), for a multinational company based in Australia. I shattered the glass ceiling everyone else framed for me (for us).

    I always thought I conquered the inability to walk mentally until I realised my main problem now is the annoyance of dealing with those around me that cannot deal with my inabilities. Because of this I have become a recluse. I don't go out much these days because I became a social phobic. I can't stand people anymore. I accept and understand that not everyone is a numbnut and ignorant, but I hide in fear of being "attacked" by those that are.


    My rant is over now.

    If you guessed that I have just recently had to deal with an ig'nant. You guessed right. I had to blow some steam. It's great to have you guys and girls here for support. And I don't mind returning the favour, although seldom do as I don't feel i could adequately contribute in a lot of cases. I will let you in on the events that lead to this very rant in another thread once I have cooled down...

  4. #114
    Senior Member DaleB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daleb
    the root of suffering is comparison. comparing yourself to others, to yourself long ago, to some imagined future. it's non-sense for me and i don't do it.
    It depends.
    Quote Originally Posted by leschinsky
    It depends.

    After my sci I just wanted to get on with my life, returning to my high school made that sometimes difficult. I couldn't help but compare my life to my friends' and become jealous.

    Thankfully college was different, I began learning what was going on in Central America at that time [i.e. war, torture, death squads], chose International Studies as my major, which helped me see the suffering that others experience in this world and be thankful for what I had.

    [...]

    i certainly agree! i don't believe (and didn't intend to imply) that comparsion = suffering, rather the other way around. Suffering can't exist, i believe, without comparing oneself to a 'non suffering' state, whatever that may be for each person in any given situation.

    a personal aside:

    as a near life long Buddhist, i also have the belief that suffering is an opportunity, one of the best, for attaining insight and wisdom. it's hard to hate this hard road as a result. it's a belief most find it difficult to appreciate, though it provides me a great deal of perspective when things get harder, as they invariably do, from time to time. any time you are faced with material 'suffering' you have a choice - to hate or to love. to fear or to embrace.

    as imight has pointed out, it's a choice. it saddens me to hear of despair,to be sure, tho i respect all points of view and i believe he will meet this again and again until it is resolved, one lifetime or another.

    ( sorry to get so )

    anyway...

    a metaphor, not my own, that i rather enjoy and think is fitting:

    when you squeeze an orange, you get orange juice. because, that is what is inside. it does not matter what is applying the pressure, the only thing that determines what comes out is what is inside.
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  5. #115
    Senior Member DaleB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rdf
    [...]
    Watching the workings of the world leads me to believe that bad things will and do happen to good people, and to bad people, and to good/bad people. It just does, there is no religious or scientific explanation available to anybody about why this is so. [...]
    rdf - i really liked your post, bro! tho...i'd offer for your consideration there are religious explanations...not generally accessible or well regarded on this side of the planet, however, they do exist! yikes - 2 posts in a row mentioning religion...i need to stop while i'm ahead. next comes politics! j/k
    Last edited by DaleB; 09-09-2008 at 11:18 PM.
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  6. #116
    Senior Member rdf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daleb
    rdf - i really liked your post, bro! tho...i'd offer for your consideration there are religious explanations...not generally accessible or well regarded on this side of the planet, however, they do exist! yikes - 2 posts in a row mentioning religion...i need to stop while i'm ahead. next comes politics! j/k
    Yeah, they exist, but in my opinion they hold no water, beyond soothing the longing we have for an answer to, and a reason for, our existence in the Universe.
    Quote Originally Posted by Daleb
    i also have the belief that suffering is an opportunity, one of the best, for attaining insight and wisdom. it's hard to hate this hard road as a result. it's a belief most find it difficult to appreciate, though it provides me a great deal of perspective when things get harder, as they invariably do, from time to time. any time you are faced with material 'suffering' you have a choice - to hate or to love. to fear or to embrace.
    Wise words Daleb. I think the higher one's injury level the more difficult such a sentiment might be to appreciate - for good reason, for many people. I base that on my own fears and maybe my self-perceived potential inabilities if I were in the shoes of those whom I write.

    But I've seen opportunity in my injury in the form of facing up a challenge, and winning...in unique ways never before dreamed by me. So to beat the challenge, you find opportunity is granted as a tool to overcome. The opportunity lies in the not before known abilities one finds inside to deal with a spinal cord injury, always looking for a better way to do something, a new way to make a daily task easier, a better maybe more profound explanation to those who query us about our injuries, or the newfound or resurrected empathy for all of humanity that many feel in their soul after their injuries - these self-discoveries and -awareness together can compensate for a great deal of what we've lost, and sometimes make us look around a little more, see things we haven't seen before, things that have always been there right before our very eyes.
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  7. #117
    Senior Member Imight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timaru
    It doesn't work like that, one minute you're thinking I'll give it five years and then top myself if there's no cure, the next you're thinking, where did the last 25 years go?
    giving it another year or 2, if not im outta here.

    dont know about anyone else, but yes, this is the worst thing that could have happened to me....and no I dont plan on dealing with this for too long...

    thats a promise i made to myself...

  8. #118
    Senior Member Imight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by leschinsky
    Absolutely, however I selfishly hope you choose to stick around

    besides you are much too inquisitive to end it all too soon. You'd miss too much. Will China become a super power? Will americans be humbled? What will Putin do next? Will Michelle Obama become our first female prez? Will DA ever admit when he's wrong?
    China will be the next superpower, and the only way we'll be humbled is when we endure a nuclear war and/or civil war.

    Even if I stayed I wouldnt remain here in the U.S. My plan (right before the accident) was to move to south america, in fact, I had just came back from Caracas, Venezuela a week before my crash. I was set to move and all. Now a days I feel lost...my plans are all screwed up.

    just got back from the pool hall and i had to call my roommate to help me lift my chair up the stairs. almost had an accident in the process. Shits just too hard, and not the way it was meant to be. That alone has convinced me id rather start over.

  9. #119
    Quote Originally Posted by Imight
    giving it another year or 2, if not im outta here.

    dont know about anyone else, but yes, this is the worst thing that could have happened to me....and no I dont plan on dealing with this for too long...

    thats a promise i made to myself...
    It's still raw.

    Timaru's right. In two years you'll be travelling the world and banging girls from Brazilian bars and wondering what that thing you had to do was.
    Last edited by RehabRhino; 09-10-2008 at 03:32 AM.
    C5/6 incomplete

    "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

  10. #120
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    Quote Originally Posted by RehabRhino
    It's still raw.

    Timaru's right. In two years you'll be travelling the world and banging girls from Brazilian bars and wondering what that thing you had to do was.
    How do you bang girls?

    Physiologically and anatomically the body gets ruined with SCI, the degree depending on the damage, and that is a fact, and I don’t think any can lie themselves away from that. And I actually don’t see anyone has done it here either, since there seems to be a consensus that SCI is crap. But, I think I can see some put up a rosy picture every now and then from days they think is joyful, thinking because they’d forgotten how a joyful day really was, or they have suppressed the past joyful days feelings, to lie to themselves -like fictive ideas of banging girls from Brazilian bars.

    And Timaru is wrong. It’s quite possible to be working for a cure for years and still live this damned ruined life, travel and meet interesting peoples. Some of you guys just lack the necessary cure stamina for some reason, but if you had it, the cure would have been here.

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