View Poll Results: are you ok with your injury?

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  • has it helped you?

    13 5.65%
  • has it ruined your life?

    104 45.22%
  • did it save your life?

    13 5.65%
  • are you just ok with it and keeping on?

    100 43.48%
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Thread: how many really think they deserved this injury or benefitted by it?

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  1. #1

    how many really think they deserved this injury or benefitted by it?

    i am so tired of this crap. i know i wasn't an angel, but i was only sitting at red light. i know shit happens, but this recent increased pain is killing me and i don't know how much more i can take.

    please, no sympathy or empathy. i'm asking, do you think there is a reason for this? do you think it helped you? in what way?

  2. #2
    I just think it forced me to grow up a lot faster than I would have in my otherwise normal life, and it has allowed me to meet a lot of good friends and influential people and opened up opportunities that probably wouldn't have otherwise been available to me.

    With only 5 years under my belt, I am still considered slightly new, so I can't say I know what you're going through.

    It sucks for sure.
    If there is light
    it will find
    you

    --Charles Bukowski

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by cass
    i'm asking, do you think there is a reason for this? do you think it helped you?
    No and no.

    I believe strongly in Chance. Sometimes, shit just happens. What is important is how you deal with it. Not that succumbing to pain and a lack of purpose and independence is something I would condemn anyone for. Even that can be handled with grace.

    C.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Timaru's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiger Racing
    No and no.

    I believe strongly in Chance. Sometimes, shit just happens. What is important is how you deal with it. Not that succumbing to pain and a lack of purpose and independence is something I would condemn anyone for. Even that can be handled with grace.

    C.
    I'm too tired to bash out an original answer, so I'll plagiarize Carol's which sums up my thoughts well but with fewer four letter words.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Zeus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiger Racing
    No and no.

    I believe strongly in Chance. Sometimes, shit just happens. What is important is how you deal with it. Not that succumbing to pain and a lack of purpose and independence is something I would condemn anyone for. Even that can be handled with grace.

    C.
    Carol,

    I'm starting to think you're a closet Hellene.

    I remember when I first read Sophocles' Oedipus Rex and considered the themes as a part of my high school English syllabus. The Ancient Greeks very much believed in a sense of 'fate' or 'destiny', but at the same time believed the choices we make in our lives ultimately determine our 'quality of life'.

    Sometimes shit just happens is right. There is no reason or purpose for this devastation. Yes, SCI forces us to change and grow - if we are to prosper.

    But the price of the lesson is pretty bloody steep...

    Chris.
    Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist wrapped in blood! Larry in 'Closer', a play by Partick Marber

  6. #6
    Senior Member wheeliecoach's Avatar
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    I do not know how to answer this...besides the last choice. There are days I do think it has benefitted me...because it has shown me how strong I really am...but there are other days where I just want to give up because I am so frustrated with my progressions, or my pain, or just realizing that something I used to be able to do I can't do anymore. I cannot say I know what you are going through, but for me...it is a day to day thing.
    "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot nothing's going to get better. It's not." - Dr. Seuss

  7. #7
    My accident was because of something i did.I got drunk and crashed an ATV. So i am quite ok with what happened to me but i also feel like life is like the Movie Final Destination..if i were to have not gotten on that four wheeler i feel as though something else would have happened to me. It could have been that if i didn't wreck that night maybe on my way home with my girlfriend we could have gotten in a car wreck and both died. I don't know i think its fate. what has happened to me was supposed to happen. If it was for me to stop drinking or for me and my mom to have a better relationship or to change other peoples lives.
    T-7 Complete
    "If you don't like something, change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it."

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Seenkid101
    ...but i also feel like life is like the Movie Final Destination..if i were to have not gotten on that four wheeler i feel as though something else would have happened to me. It could have been that if i didn't wreck that night maybe on my way home with my girlfriend we could have gotten in a car wreck and both died. ..
    I always had that exact feeling. My bff's husband died of a heart attack the night of my sci. The only reason I wasn't with her is that he seemed to be getting better, I had company, I called her, she said 'No, all is well, go, have fun. I'm OK. They're moving Gary out of ICU tomorrow."

    We were SO careful that night. Stayed downtown to eliminate any drinking and driving. Wound up scarcely drinking at all. Only went out in a group of 3, for safety in rough'n'tumble downtown Houston. Only wore silver jewelry, carried very little cash, b/c there are fates down there you don't want to tempt by wearing diamonds and gold. We were practically sedate that night.

    Then I fell in a fountain.

    When I broke my neck, I thought "If I'd been at the hospital with Gina, I think I'd have been run over by an ambulance while out smoking in front of the ER."

    Not that there is "some reason this happened", or "God has a plan". More like "Shit happens, and my name came up."

  9. #9
    Super Moderator Sue Pendleton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by betheny
    I always had that exact feeling. My bff's husband died of a heart attack the night of my sci. The only reason I wasn't with her is that he seemed to be getting better, I had company, I called her, she said 'No, all is well, go, have fun. I'm OK. They're moving Gary out of ICU tomorrow."
    .......

    Then I fell in a fountain.

    When I broke my neck, I thought "If I'd been at the hospital with Gina, I think I'd have been run over by an ambulance while out smoking in front of the ER."

    Not that there is "some reason this happened", or "God has a plan". More like "Shit happens, and my name came up."
    A fountain!?! That still tickles my 'not so funny' bone. I still can't believe someone like Beth could be done in by a fountain. Well, I know this was not "God has a plan". You have to believe in some huge puppeter in the sky to go there. "Some reason this happened"? To wipe my family line off the Earth, maybe? I mean first my sister; then my older brother hit a piece of black ice; and my little brother hit by leukemia. So knock me out because I was planning on that family thing right then? Wouldn't a nice simple inhospitable uterus be simpler than plotting a spinal stroke? Or to piss me off with the frustration of it all that I'd get into the cure advocacy side of this? I was close to finishing my poli sci degree when this hit so getting there might have happened anyway.

    "Shit happens"? Hmmm. At what point does coincidence become a lightening bolt looming over your head waiting to strike You? Not him or her but Sue. If the spinal infarct happened the Monday before or the Monday after I would have already dropped the spousal unit at work and been home reading the Stars and Stripes and drinking coffee. When the pain hit I probably would have done the same thing I did beside that county road on Memorial Day Monday. Shake out the arms, bend over and shake the hands. When the pain stopped and my hands felt numb I would have curled up with my pup on the sofa for a nap. By the time I woke up because breathing was hard I wouldn't have been able to move and died. But it was an American holiday in Germany so two cars of us were together. "Shit happens"?

    Too much coincidice for me Beth. Should be for you too I suppose. I figure I was Ivan the Terrible in a past life. I'm hoping this life straightens all the bad karma out. I'm hoping the next time around I come back as a basically nice person with a basic boring life in a small town someplace that has indoor plumbing and solid floors.

    Deserve this injury Cass? I was no saint but nothing to deserve this either. Not in this life anyway. Benefitted by a non-traumatic SCI? It all evens out I guess so I'd say NO. Pretty much ruined my plans and even my back up plans for my life.
    Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."

    Disclaimer: Answers, suggestions, and/or comments do not constitute medical advice expressed or implied and are based solely on my experiences as a SCI patient. Please consult your attending physician for medical advise and treatment. In the event of a medical emergency please call 911.

  10. #10
    No. I think you can find a purpose but I don't believe that there is a purpose. So most of us have had bad luck.

    What drives me crazy about the fate versus chance concept unveils itself when well-intentioned people approach me trying to convince that I'm working off past karma or I made a choice in the past life, or God/Jesus wants me to be in the chair to " be special".

    I've decided it's their own insecurities being projected upon me. Some attempt for the human brain to find something logical in the illogical world. Oh well -- that debate will go on for eternity in an infinite amount of possibilities.

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