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Thread: Kate's On Line Journal

  1. #61

    Betheny's oven-finally

    Hey y'all! I went out of town after Christmas. It is so nice to know that you guys care about me and my oven. My husband had made bread pudding and spilled something in the oven. Christmas day, we had Honey-Baked Ham and all the sides, already prepared. Just heat 'em up. Steve (my husband) is napping, holidays make him grouchy. I did the little bit of prep necessary, stuck all the sides in the oven. My son starts hollering-Mom-oh, Mom! The stuff in the bottom was flaming, I'm in a wheelchair and not about to sacrifice any flesh over this. The smoke detectors woke Steve, he came in, grabbed the food, put the fire out w/ a rag. No big deal really, just put him in a worse mood. The food was fine, no harm done. But I've gotta clean this oven! I so enjoy all of your posts. I wish my husband would read them. He would then count his blessing re the small amount of help I require. He's not a count your blessings kind of guy. But he sure is a rock. I'm lucky. As are all of your "significant others". I wish you all the best, the very best, in 2003. Betheny

  2. #62
    LOL, Bethany! Been there, done that! Actually the time I remember the best was in a restaurant kitchen, where they hadn't cleaned the grease from behind the fryers for a long, long time; one of the line cooks was flaming something in a skillet at the burners right beside the fryers and poooof, the whole back of the cooking line was on fire! Sprinklers started, food was ruined, and the place had to close for the night. Unfortunately, the head chef was fired for not keeping up with the cleaning - that'll larn him!And, fortunately for me, being only the 'salad girl' I was on the other side of the kitchen, making aps and salads!

    to all of you lilac lovers - we too, have a big lilac bush in the yard - must be 100 years old and so gorgeous. We've also got wisteria all over the trees in teh woods behind, and they all bloom at about the same time, so the whole property is purple for a few days! Then a wind comes up and we have purple snow!

    Russ, I'm going to start a new thread in Care re the TBI resources, because I think the info could be shared by all; maybe if you can think of some I don't have, you can post them there. Your humor with Steve really brings smiles to my face! Only someone who's been through the mill can make jokes like this!

    And yes, I too, am more careful with my own safety, as I think of what it would be like if I weren't around, or disabled myself, and hubbie was the only one to take care of Matt. The first two or so years post accident, I was awful in the car, terribly jittery, and mashing that invisible brake on the passenger side when hubbie was driving. I also have thought more about my own mortality in general, and often find myself just not wanting to go there!

    Mary (I promise I won't call you Mare anymore!) - Please tell me the magic words to use for the Laundry Fairies!! Oh, and the dish fairies, and the cleaning fairies, and - oh, never mind.

    And Martha, my dear, dear Martha - read in the other thread - you've had a 'moment', my friend! Cherish it, hold it to your heart, remember what it felt like, and open yourself to many, many more!

    Tough times don't last - tough people do.

  3. #63

    I remember the day...

    Jackie told me I would not know what it was like to be a caregiver....

    Today I was remembering the day my Jacquie stopped walking....she was began with a slight limp and a slow regression of vitality...and for two years she degenerated....and there were doctors and vials and vials of blood and x-rays and terror waiting for the Muscular Dystrophy and Lupus and Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis tests....not to mention...well it went on and on. Someday I will post a picture of a child with the look and ability of a little incomplete quad screaming in pain on Santa's lap. Someday when I can bring myself to see it myself. Those were harsh years...she was big to be so baby like again. She could do little for herself and had become largely incontinent again. The worst was in the not knowing and the inablility to help ease her pain. There were exacerbations and remissions and FINALLY she was diagnosed as a severe asthmatic. She was starved for oxygen and it took a very patient and lucky physician to hear her first real wheeze. After 2.5 years of caring full time for Jacquie I got a treatment plan. I kept her out of the hospital the entire time, and two years later I sent her to kindergarten as a normal child with a medication regime involving 9 daily prescriptions. I was relentless and unwavering, I modified the house to support her respiratory needs and we ate the right foods and avoided inappropriate environments. Somewhere in the midst my son John was diagnosed with a mass on his heart...and he underwent a very dangerous procedure. From his room at Children's I managed her asthma via my Mom over the phone...sometimes a three ring circus I have picked this place to tell you guys... on some little level...I know... I just understand and I know. As some of you have seen, and have heard ...I now have two very normal and healthy growing preteen kids. For this reason, I don't complain too much about the normal pitfalls of children growing up... I am just daily thankful that they are both still with me, both healthy and otherwise normal.

    Just another one of my new years gratitudes i guess...

    Hey Kate!!!! Thanks baby!! You know what I mean!!!


    ...and she lived happily ever after...

  4. #64
    Dear Mary,

    Thank you so much for sharing part of your life with us. I had no idea about your son and your daughter. I am very glad that they are alright now.......what awful things to go through with both of your children.

    I wish you and your children a wonderful year in 2003.


  5. #65

    Thank You But I would like to add...

    Marmalady is one of the strongest women I have ever met in my life. I have had the pleasure of two meetings and remember our conversations fondly. When I said that she told me I could not know what it was like to be a caregiver for a loved one with a SCI, I agreed with her. I don't and I can't. I know the part about escorting my loved ones to the door of death and permanent disability, but I also now know the JOY one feels when that person is made well again and brought back to full function. Perhaps this is part of the reason I am needing to be involved in SCI, because I have every hope and intention of seeing this JOY again in my many new friends here. Still and all it does not qualify me in anyway to claim complete understanding and even with my life experience that is the biggest point I needed to make. Yet, I feel such compassion, and hold such respect for those of you rendering care put up with so much, not from any magnanimous nature but simply because you have no choice but to do so and get on with it. If anything I have been learning from the attention of some of you women here, it has been that it is just time to release my past and just get on with today, perhaps I will be going out to buy a new house. And get on with it.

    Have a wonderful day, thank you for your indulgence.


    ...and she lived happily ever after...

  6. #66

    A snowy day in WV

    Spent the morning curled up on the couch, eating oatmeal and reading. It's still snowing; it started yesterday and has continued pretty steadily since. I'm letting Brianna sleep's her first birthday present! Remember how much you could sleep when you were a teen/young adult?

    So...I'm making her favorite meal (Quiche Lorraine) for dinner, and since we don't like cake very much, cherry pie. She has two small presents to open today (Lord of the Rings DVD and new Tim McGraw CD) but her big present is a trip back to Michigan in a few weeks to see Phantom of the Opera. She CANNOT wait! It will be so, she'll get to visit my folks and my brothers and have yet another birthday celebration.

    Once Bri's birthday is over, the holidays are really over for us. I have to say, even with moving and all, this has been the most peaceful, restful holiday season I can remember. It was sorely needed! Now if we would only hear from Craig Hospital as to when Bri will be admitted!

    And to it's my turn....YOU GO, GIRL! A new house? Yeah!!
    Betheny...of COURSE we care about you and your oven!

    How is everyone else's Holiday Aftermath going? Anyone got exciting plans for January?


  7. #67
    Just a test - site's been acting goofy, and I want to see if I can post.

    Tough times don't last - tough people do.

  8. #68
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2003

    To Mary

    Au contraire. The beauty of these caregivers is that they DO have a choice-they could ditch us, the problem people. What's cool is that they don't do so. My 2 cents-Betheny

  9. #69
    Senior Member martha's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Texas hallelujah!

    A Near Pefect Day

    It was absolutely beautiful on the Texas Gulf Coast today -- like stealing a day from Spring. Blue skies, blue water, puffy clouds, warm and beautiful. And of course it helps that husband had no crises today and the dogs even behaved -- no accidents. I think I've found a home for the remaining foster dog after he's neutered (poor guy) but that will be two weeks. Now I'm going to sit down, be lazy and watch the movie on Enron which should be thoroughly infuriating to relive.

  10. #70


    Good point Bethany ....well said


    ...and she lived happily ever after...

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