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Thread: Kate's On Line Journal

  1. #101
    HEY DOGGER THE SPURS WILL TEAR UP THE SHEETS TOO...HOW DID I KNOW THAT....HMM..ER..UH....UMMMM..WELL THEN I UH....HMMMMM OH DEAR...

    HI KATE...HOWS THE WEATHER?

    MARY

    ...and she lived happily ever after...

  2. #102
    Senior Member martha's Avatar
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    For all of you in the frozen north, I'm sorry! It was 77 degrees here today and gorgeous. Even the drive to Houston to the physiatrist wasn't too bad. Right now the fog is rolling in like San Francisco and everything is starting to look eerie.

    I finally convinced the doc to address husband's cognitive problems and he's being referred for a neuro-psych and to a program of day therapy for brain injuries. The only downside is my having to drive him to Houston for it. Someday my boss is really going to expect me to go back to work all day every day and I don't know what I'll do then. With driving husband to all his docs and all the other stuff, I don't have time to work. But in the interim, maybe we'll get some good out of this program.

  3. #103
    Okay, Okay, rub it in with your 77 degrees!! I like the cold - really I do!

    Good news, Martha, about the neuro-psych and cog rehab; as long as he's willing to go in with an open mind, he'll get some valuable tools and techniques to work with. We just finished a great book - got it at Borders, but I'm sure Amazon has it;

    Living With Brain Injury - A guide for Families - 2nd ed., by Richard Senelick, MD & Karla Dougherty

    Good informative read for families as well as those affected.

    Bif, the coolest cat in the world, died in my arms yesterday. He waited for me to get home from work, and passed away about 10 minutes after I got in the house. Another era ended.

    _____________
    Tough times don't last - tough people do.

  4. #104
    Senior Member martha's Avatar
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    Jackie, I'm so sorry about Bif! From what you had said earlier, his suffering is at least at an end. But even knowing that, of course we grieve for our furry friends and family members. And I know it's also hard on your husband since Bif had been with him for so long. I wish there were words to console everyone. In 2001, in addition to Julian's accident, I lost all three of my big dog-children. I didn't know what to grieve for the most. We still talk about those guys almost every day.

    Actually, I prefer the cold to the heat. But 77 is hard to beat! Now in Aug or Sept when it's over 100 and 99% humidity, I'll be screaming like a gut-shot mule! I HATE the heat.

  5. #105
    Senior Member kate's Avatar
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    I am in a bad mood!

    9th grader obsessing about her hair/clothes/latest movie love object while I try to help her get ready for her French final tomorrow. . . . 7th grader making herself a cup of sodium disguised as ramen noodles when I've just made some pretty good curry, unacceptable to her refined taste . . . kitchen strewn with backpacks and books and loose paper, husband trying to wheel around it all, every surface cluttered, and I think I'll go insane with the mess.

    Arrrrgggghhhh. (Visualize middle-aged mom in a futile fit.)

    There.

    Jackie, I remember the first time we lost a pet. How astonished I was that it could be THAT painful, how determined to fill our lives with animals afterwards. If it hurt that much, it must be worth a lot. Now we have 3 cats, a dog, and a couple of birds. Altogether, they make less mess than one innocent 12-yr-old human.

    Here's what's really driving me crazy. I write, yes? I mean, I'm trained to write fiction, which means I know the importance of getting the minute details absolutely accurate . . . so I'm making this memoir about our family in the thick of the maelstrom created by the accident. And there are some things I CAN'T REMEMBER, which aren't in my journals, or my old emails, or anywhere. It's driving me temporarily nuts, knowing that I let this stuff slip away forever.

    I read in someone's post on another forum that he'd done his best to forget all this stuff, and I thought, oh, God, that is so the opposite of how I have to deal with it. I have to understand what it was that happened to us, like, exactly. I don't know why, but I do.

  6. #106
    Kate,

    It is not that it has slipped away forever..it is only that it is not yet time for you to remember..so leave a space....there will come that day when you sit up and realize the things here and there that you had forgotten...they will return to you when you have had peace. For now, simply go around them.


    Mary

    ...and she lived happily ever after...

  7. #107
    Thursday afternoon, and another snow storm! They keep saying only 1-3 inches, but it's so bitterly cold, and the wind is whipping the falling snow around, making it look much worse. So much for going shopping today with Brianna; we can get down the driveway fine, but getting back UP is a challenge in the car; the SUV, with its 4WD, can go up and down the drive fairly easily, but getting BRI into the SUV is the other challenge! It's so high. I'm seriously looking into a Subaru Forester; an SUV, with 4WD that is LOW...she could easily transfer into it. Anyone have any experience with this vehicle?

    Jackie, I'm so sorry about Bif. Our pets enrich our lives on so many levels. Bri and I are making a trip back to Michigan for five days; my ex got all five cats, so we're making plans to go visit them! (And my parents, too, of course! )

    Martha...77 degrees would be nice today, but I'm with you on anything over 80 or humid...I melt! Guess I'll take the cold!

    Kate~No wonder your posts are so much fun...trained to write fiction? I love writing as well, but I was trained to identify skeletons! Ah well....

    Vicky

  8. #108
    Senior Member martha's Avatar
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    Vicky, I bragged too soon. It started getting cold yesterday and will be down to freezing by tonight. It's still better than the heat and what's nicer than curling up in front of a nice fire! (on those rare occasions one has time to sit still long enough to enjoy it)

    There's something weird starting to happen with me. I can't explain it, but every now and then I actually feel like "me" again. You know when you have enough mental and physical energy to contemplate starting a project that's been let go for 2 years? Or you notice that you aren't constantly depressed ALL of the time? I hope this is the "door to life" opening back up. Shoot, I even smile now and then again! Think I'll start with one small project and see if I can actually finish something. Keep your fingers crossed for me! LOL

    Kate, I understand what you said about the counsellor and I would have loved to have found one that I thought helped. But I have to say, I've gotten more help from the wonderful people on this Caregiving Forum than I could have imagined. Thanks to all for your help, advice, support and for letting me know I'm not alone and not totally crazy. I really wish I could meet all of you.

    Ok, that's the group hug for the day from this end. Think I'll pick a color and contemplate painting the guest bathroom this weekend.

  9. #109
    Martha~

    Cram your foot in the door!! Embrace the weirdness!! And seriously...keep smiling. You ARE on your way back; I have a "feeling" about this. None of us is TOTALLY crazy...

    Vicky

    P.S. What color are you going with?

  10. #110
    Vicki, Do, do, do check out the Forester - I have one and adore it! There are lots of hills in central Jersey and 'Sammy Subaru' takes 'em all like a champ, no matter what the weather. It is lower, and you'd definitely have an easier time with transfers. Drives more like a car than an SUV. And Subaru has put a lot of little bells and whistles on the Forester that make it a lot of fun!

    Martha, Martha, Martha - I'm turning cartwheels here - not a pretty sight, but I am!!! It IS beginning to happen; you'll get little glimpses, and little pieces of feeling happy - then feeling guilty for feeling happy - then feeling happy again. You've been trekking through a long, dark tunnel, and are finally begining to see some light at the end - and that light is the rest of your life!

    Kate, If I can reach waaay back on the forums here, weren't you going to write something about SCI at one time? Or was it someone else I was thinking of?

    No snow here, but frigid, take your breath away cold. The kind of 'too cold to snow' weather.

    And you're right about the pets enriching your life, Vicki; we do miss Bif, he was such a character. He'd go into the basement and 'sing'; first time he did it, we thought he'd gotten his tail caught in the dryer or something, but no - he was just singing! Looked at us like 'what?' Was deathly afraid of vaccum cleaner hoses; he'd bank off the wall when he saw it! And had an uncanny knack for knowing exactly which visitors hated cats or were allergic to them, and of course would plop right in their laps. Cheap entertainment!

    It's been a tough week here, going to sign off and go catch some zzzzzzzz's. Bye, all! Love ya, Ladies!

    _____________
    Tough times don't last - tough people do.

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