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Thread: anniversary

  1. #1

    anniversary

    Matt's 3 year anniversary is tomorrow; I have such a hollow feeling in my stomach; so many memories; and how far he's come; how far he has to go.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    Jul 2001
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    Manassas,Va. USA
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    Is Matt your son?

    Would you like to tell us what happened. Where he was and where he is, maybe where he's hoping to be? My son Justin's 3 year anniversary is in Jan.We just came home from a Memorial service for a 19 year old boy who died in a car accident Last Sat. Friends of ours. Tuff stuff this land of lost dreams.

  3. #3
    Senior Member BJ's Avatar
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    Jul 2001
    Location
    Denver, CO USA
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    anniversary

    I think after time (varries according to the person) life just tends to take over. Hubby's accident was 28 years ago last Mother's Day (great gift for Mom that year). We were discussing this with a guy newly injured a few weeks ago, hubby said the last 15 years the date just kind of passed without him realizing it. He remembered it was Mother's Day but the injury thing just never made the radar screen. This year we were with my folks having dinner when we got home he remembered but it was more of - WOW 28 years ago at this time I was getting ice tongs in my head for traction, time really has flown,then we went to sleep.

    We both believe it helps if you are they type of person to get busy with life, we have a few friends who just can't seem to focus on anything but what they can't do. We focus on what can still be done

  4. #4

    anniversary

    Tag,
    I'm glad that after 28 years for you, it's a faded memory; however, for those of us closer to the events that changed our lives, the wounds are still a little raw. We honor that 'anniversary' with remembrance in the same way that we honor other major, life-changing happenings, with the appropriate emotions. Just as we honor births, marriages, anniversaries, with happy emotions, we also honor disability and the passing on of family members with a sense of mourning. I believe this is normal. NO ONE is wallowing in a sense of grief; NO ONE is not moving on with their lives; we're remembering what is lost, trying to deal as best we can with our own individual present circumstances, and looking forward to what will be gained, and the challenges we will face in the future.

    My hat is off to you and hubbie - you are remarkable people - not everyone is in your shoes.

    Joseph,

    Hi, and welcome! Matt was living in South Carolina, managing a rock band, coming back from a concert in North Carolina on a stormy, windswept Caroline autumn night. Lots of wind and leaves blowing around, and something flew up against the driver's windshield. (Weather was so bad the hospital had grounded its Med-Evac helicopter) Matt was in the back of a Nissan Pathfinder with the seats down, snoozing with one of the band members. When the driver reactively swerved as the debris hit the windshield, the car spun on the wet road, tumbled end over end, and landed against a pine tree upside down. Matt was the only one injured; closed head injury, with TBI, memory loss; C4-5 quad, on respirator for 5 months, now at about
    C6-7. No drugs, no alcohol, no speeding, no one to get angry at but Mother Nature and fate.

    It does get better; I think back to where we were three years ago, Matt on critical list, not moving anything, docs saying that was it, don't hope for anything more, to where we are today; so much hope, so much improvement!

    God bless us, every one! Jackie

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