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Thread: What happened to YOU?

  1. #21
    Quote Originally Posted by cass
    mine was an mva too. sitting at red light on way to engineering job, about 8 a.m. or half past. guy going over 80 mph rearended me. i don't really care to relate it to every joe/jane doe who asks.
    Agreed, this is a sensitive subject for me. I think maybe the best answer would be to somebody who wrecks my day by asking would be "let me ask you this, why do you people try to make me relive everyday what happened to me, just let me live my life the way I am since you and your stupid society force me to live this way because of your anti-science beliefs".
    "Life is about how you
    respond to not only the
    challenges you're dealt but
    the challenges you seek...If
    you have no goals, no
    mountains to climb, your
    soul dies".~Liz Fordred

  2. #22
    Rarely get asked, doesn't bother me when I do. I agree with Scott.

    Although the best suggestion for an answer I ever saw here was....."I was a porn star and I fell off the horse"
    C5/6 incomplete

    "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

  3. #23
    well, either it's the relative newness of your injury, or brits are more polite (or, ha ha, afraid you're diseased and they'll catch it ). anyway, glad you don't get asked it rehab.

  4. #24
    Senior Member lynnifer's Avatar
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    I actually had one middle-aged lady approach me at the mall when I was a teenager. She got right up in my face so I couldn't push forward and said, "God will make you walk again." I had to back up a bit and then wheel around her! This happened numerous times in the laundry room at my old apartment building as well (it was a senior's residence). One night I broke down crying to a complete stranger when the subject of religion was brought up. Bad day at work, bad day with David - I remember that night well and her name was Sue. She didn't have any answers either, lol.

    The only time sex has come up as a question were with 'prospectives' (mostly in a bar when I was younger - worst place to meet people), at high school and my sister finally asked 11 years ago - lol.

    I also dislike being spoken about like a piece of furniture. Unfortunately as a kid, I had to put up with this A LOT. My mother was notorious for this and it used to drive me, and my father, mad. Eventually I grew a voice and used to say, "Don't mind me, just the lamp on the table here," and she would stop ... but she had a real difficult time stopping it. Took literally YEARS!

    What I hate now is how everyone says, "Stem cells should help you," like I'm going to get a shot or something in two years and be up and walking again right away without problem ... even when I try to explain the science and the nature of secondary complications, their eyes glaze over and it's like they think I'm talking crap. Hate that!
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

  5. #25
    No stranger ever came up to me and asked until I went to visit Montreal! Is it a North American thing? Well, I just told them the truth. I don't really care and I don't have anything to prove so what's the difference?

  6. #26
    yes. i expect to be treated like anybody else out there, including the rude guy who let restaurant door slam in my face just last night he knew i was behind him, ab or not, rude. no big. i opened it myself and had a good time.

    no mim, happened to me in australia as well, the sex thing. at a train station. to me, the diff is it doesn't happen to ab's and it is really harrassment. at another place in so. cal., a police officer heard it and asked if i wanted guy arrested.
    Last edited by cass; 07-22-2008 at 04:15 AM.

  7. #27
    Senior Member
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    Here is a memory I suppressed. It was that unplesant!

    A woman at the grocery store walked directly in front of me, bent over and said, "Let's pray." I looked at her, with wide eyes, mouh open, in total shock. Her statement left me speechless. Then she claimed, "God can heal you, you know." That is when I lost it, and started yelling at her to get away from me. Created quite a scene, as I recall.

    She was strange looking. She wore a funny hat with a veil, and flowered dress. She looked like the church lady character.

  8. #28
    lol when I was working at Walmart during my glorious transitional career some woman tried to pray over me. I told her Walmart didn't allow praying on the clock.

    Sometimes I hate the what happened question. Sometimes it doesn't bother me. I have thought about carrying business cards with the explanation so I don't have to say it over and over. It happens a LOT here. Maybe the card can have a website where they can make donations.
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.


    Sometimes it is easier to widen doors than it is to open minds.

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Curt Leatherbee
    How about "a Lobster bit me" or really scare em and say I just woke up one mourning and the wheelchair was beside my bed, it was my destiny, hehe.

    I still say its a very rude question that only stupid people would ask such a thing out of the blue. Would I think of asking Fat people why they are fat? of course not. Would I think of asking somebody that smelled like poop, hey why do you smell like poop are you wearing a colostomy bag or something? of course not. Let em do a search on the internet for different causes of Paralysis if they are that curious, but then again if they are so stupid to ask such a question they are probabley too stupid to know how to operate a computer.
    We wouldn't (probably, but who knows?) ask a fat person how they got fat because the cause is obvious - but hearing the excuses might be fun. LOL. Just kidding, I'm no fattie lover but in public I'm generally amiable, at least in conversation, with the obese. Someone who stinks is not someone to ask about it. So why would you, a moderator even, recommend the the SCId take on an adversarial relationship with any stranger who approaches them in public expressing the curiosity that most have about what put us on wheels?

    I don't get your hostility in this area, Curt and I wouldn't advise anyone to take on a simular stance re their disability and the public. We're emissaries though we like it or not.
    "The world will not perish for want of wonders but for want of wonder."
    J.B.S.Haldane

  10. #30
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    Addiesue,
    I have to admit your idea of putting the cause of disability right there on a business card along with other pertinent information made me smile. There could even be a graphic of the internation wheelchair symbol and a slogan below, such as "make sure the tide is IN before you dive!"

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