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  1. Replies
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    Newbee, There are plenty of us that know...

    Newbee,

    There are plenty of us that know exactly what you mean. I think as a caregiver your pain and suffering feels invisible and actually is invisible to the world. With our husbands, their...
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    9,214

    We had a similar thing happen with a night nurse....

    We had a similar thing happen with a night nurse. He became way too friendly and had some problems you couldn’t believe. This built up and went on for a few years until everything just blew up. ...
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    6,503

    Hi Jenny, Welcome to CC. My husband has a...

    Hi Jenny,

    Welcome to CC. My husband has a trach and has for nearly 7 years now. He has a C3 complete injury and is no longer on a vent but had some complicating circumstances (namely paralysis...
  4. ND: My husband is a C3-C4 quad. He is...

    ND:

    My husband is a C3-C4 quad. He is 6’1” and weighs 200 lbs. I get him undressed in his regular wheelchair. I roll his shower chair into the bedroom and place it along side his regular...
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    6,422

    She's beautiful! How wonderful! What a joyful...

    She's beautiful! How wonderful! What a joyful addition to your family. Congrats.

    Trish
  6. Replies
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    16,956

    OK-I give. You win. Yes, yes I only seek...

    OK-I give. You win. Yes, yes I only seek sympathy. What is the matter with me? Able body people don’t deserve sympathy. After nine years of marriage, my husband suffers the worst that SCI has...
  7. Replies
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    16,956

    Thanks Cheesecake, you showed us the way 5 years...

    Thanks Cheesecake, you showed us the way 5 years ago and continue to do so today. I'll let you know if my DC plans work out.

    Thanks for your support, kindness, and love these last 5 years.
  8. Replies
    59
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    16,956

    I'm sorry you feel this way. And by the way, my...

    I'm sorry you feel this way. And by the way, my husband has read every post. I doubt that he would talk to you. He really doesn't like bullies. It is a shame that you can not put yourself in a...
  9. Replies
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    16,956

    Get the HELL out of the caregiving forum. You...

    Get the HELL out of the caregiving forum. You haven't a clue about our lives. He is not a nagging responsibility. He is my husband that I care for and love very much. Excuse me for needing a...
  10. Replies
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    16,956

    Believe me donz, I suck it up every single day. ...

    Believe me donz, I suck it up every single day. That's what we caregivers do, suck it up at the expense of our own health and needs. But thanks for your thoughtful advice. I'll check with my quad...
  11. Replies
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    16,956

    I refer to him as that because I don't want to...

    I refer to him as that because I don't want to use his name. How about my handsome, loving, adorable quad husband. And yeah, if he was a para he would be my para husband. I only wish that was the...
  12. Replies
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    16,956

    Just for clarification, we do have PCA help. We...

    Just for clarification, we do have PCA help. We actually have nursing care (RN or LPN) approximately 50-60 hours a week because my husband is a high level quad with a trach. But I am one of those...
  13. Replies
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    16,956

    Can I have my own sick day?

    I sprained my ankle (at least that is what the X-ray said) on a Tuesday night 2 weeks ago. I was supposed to keep it elevated, wear this air cast, ice it, and get crutches for 5 days. Do I get to...
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    Ami, All I can say is I am so sorry. If you...

    Ami,

    All I can say is I am so sorry. If you need moral support, you have mine. I read all of these family stories and know just how I don't want to be to my kids when they grow up. God forbid...
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    If you look at the IRS definitions, health aids...

    If you look at the IRS definitions, health aids by definition are considered household employees and thus as their employer you should withhold and do all the employer matching. The work you...
  16. Replies
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    5,306

    I agree with Ami 100%. We pay above the table...

    I agree with Ami 100%. We pay above the table always. We withhold taxes, pay state unemployment taxes, pay the employer matching FICA, etc. It just takes one pissed off PCA or housekeeper to turn...
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    “Wife as caregiver” is the hardest thing I...

    “Wife as caregiver” is the hardest thing I have ever done or ever dreamed of doing. My husband is C3-C4, no arm/hand function at all plus he has a trach. We also have two “tween” sons. ...
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    I agree with OJ about the criminal background...

    I agree with OJ about the criminal background check. I would ask for (insist on) one. I just hired 10 new employees at my "away from home work" and all had to have a criminal background check and...
  19. Ami, I am so very happy to hear that you have...

    Ami,

    I am so very happy to hear that you have made the turn for the better. This ride is certainly full of highs, lows, and some very lows. I myself am having a very difficult time right now...
  20. Replies
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    I’m like Ami (been there, done that) and...

    I’m like Ami (been there, done that) and totally agree with her. There is no excuse for your wife’s behavior, but your wife is at the end of her rope and she needs some help with your care. Was...
  21. Replies
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    18,580

    I understand that your wife is no longer able or...

    I understand that your wife is no longer able or willing to be your primary caregiver. It is an overwhelming job especially when she is also caring for the children. She has every right to NOT be...
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    when you can do the bowel program, answer your...

    when you can do the bowel program, answer your phone, and eat your breakfast all at the same time….

    when you visit some AB sickie at home or in a hospital and you start to hold a drink up to...
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    I don't know what to say except that I am so...

    I don't know what to say except that I am so sorry. I can only wish you strength, peace, and hope as you face this tragedy. You are in my prayers.

    Trish
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    Wanna run away for a day? I'll meet you halfway....

    Wanna run away for a day? I'll meet you halfway. I wish!!!!! Hope things improve tomorrow.

    Hugs,
    Trish
  25. Thread: How's WM?

    by taj2002
    Replies
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    4,808

    WM, I'm am so sorry for the difficult times...

    WM,

    I'm am so sorry for the difficult times you were and are facing. I am glad to hear that things are looking a little bit brighter for you. You are one strong woman. Hang is there.

    Trish
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