Child Custody Fight

[Pam Baureis]

My son is David it's been 3 yrs since his injury due to a drunk driver hitting him. He is a c4/c5 incomplete, David has lived with me and my husband for the past 2yrs, because his wife left him. They have a little girl 4 yrs old. (my granddaughter). The mother signed physical custody to my son. We were waiting for the divorce to be final before she came to live with us. (she was coming over on week-ends and various days during the week). In the meantime the other grandparents (mother parents) found out the mother was doing drugs (bad drugs) which we had no knowledge of. They got a temporary custody order. And now they are saying that David can't take care of his daughter due to him being in a wheelchair. Now David's attorney has told me that since me and my husband are with David 24 hrs day/7 days a week that they can't due this. They are asking that we take a drug test, because all the meds David is on. And they have said we do drugs.(which is false). They are the kind of people that when David got hurt they thought he would be coming into alot of money. When it didn't happen that way. They all left him. They have alway thought that they're daughter was to good for my son.

Can anyone help with information about parents raising a child even if they have a spinal cord injury.

[SCI-Nurse]

I would refer you to several website for parents with disabilities:

This first one is most important. They have a legal assistance foundation, and will provide either direct legal assistance in custody matters, or consultation to your own attorney. It is also a great resouce site in general:

http://lookingglass.org

Here are some other good sites:

http://www.disabledparents.net

http://www.dppi.org.uk/

This one is for mothers, but still has some good applicable information:

http://paramom.com/mpc/docs/Site/Home.html

(KLD)

[Aly]

Why cant your son take care of the child being a c4/5 incomplete, in general even with you around?

[Pam Baureis]

The ex-in-laws for very mean spirited people. They are telling people in our community that David could die at any moment. (not true). David is doing very well. They want Julianna's Social Security Check. Know ones sees that, it goes straight the bank for her future.

[queen]

:) If your son has a good attorney, he will most likely bore a hole through the in-laws schemes for your grandaughter's SS check. (Truly caring in-laws should be looking inward and helping their daughter with her drug problems rather than slinging lies and slanderous rumors outward). But that's in a perfect world.

Like Aly, your son should be able to provide the love and care his daughter needs, with you and Poppy just being an added bonus and living in the same household.

I would also provide for your attorney several individuals for your own personal references and those who observe your son's care of his daughter while she is in his care. Use them on on the day of the divorce hearing to null and void the in-laws accusations about you. I did this during my divorce and the judge saw right through my ex-husbands ploy.

With your daughter-in-law already turning over custody and living the "drug" lifestyle, she most likely would be requested by the judge to seek rehab. and some parenting classes before he would even consider letting her even have equal custody rights in the future.

Never, ever say anything bad to the child about Mommy of other set of grandparents being mean..NEVER. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all...same goes for your son. She'll figure all that out on her own. And, if you do say bad things in front of her about her Mommy or the grands it will usually come back to bite you in the keester later.

Good Luck to you, your son and your granddaughter! Stay hopeful and strong!

Queen

Keep us posted on the outcome!

[queen]

You could also provide for the judge a doctor's statement on your son's overall health. Yep, he could get pneumonia, or a pressure sore, and die, but the daughter-in-law with her lifestyle could also get HIV or Hepatitis C. Personally, I'd rather have her exposed to your son, than the daugther-in-law.

Queen