Dressing like an adult, and how to feel feminine??

[~Lin]

Do you guys wear clothes like skirts and dresses? And nice shoes, I know I've read of at least one member that wears high heels?

Its silly, but its the little things that seem to depress me the most about being disabled. I can't hold hands with who I'm dating due to pain, not being able to wear high heels.. I'm a part time wheelchair user. Up until now, I haven't been able to wear skirts or dresses since I was in high school. This was due to having to choose shoes that fit with ankle braces and orthotics, and pants to cover up the leg bracing. I went to my oldest friend's wedding this past saturday and seeing all the guests in dresses and high heels made me really sad. But now with the wheelchair, I have a bit more freedom... I don't have to put on all my leg bracing if I'm going to be using the chair! So I'm starting to think about dresses and skirts and pretty shoes. Though another concern of mine is skin issues, and being very ashamed of the way the skin on my legs looks. I can always cover it up with tights though!

I also want to cover my wrist braces. I love how they are barely noticeable in cold weather with long sleeves. Completely invisible when long sleeves are combined with wheelchair gloves! I've started getting an interest in wrist warmers, to be used as wrist brace covers. I can't believe I never thought of it before. There are wrist brace covers sold, but they're really expensive. I sew so I'm going to start messing around with it. And a friend of mine knits, so we talked and if I supply the yarn she will knit me 'fingerless gloves' perfectly sized to cover the braces. Hopefully I will have some for fall! I'm not sure how to combine them with gloves for pushing the chair though. That would be overkill, braces, covers, AND gloves! I bought some wide elastic to make a loop to put over the part of the brace that shows below my gloves. I'm wanting to dye a set of my braces black, so that way combined with black gloves it should all blend together. The black elastic will help cover most in case the dye job is horrible, and it doubles by preventing the bottom velcro strap from detaching. The braces are white and grey, so I also got white velcro and was looking at pale tan gloves and then staining the white elastic with tea to match, and not much grey should show? I have a couple sets of braces btw, so that I swap between washing. I'm working in my head though on making something that would work with (the much prettier) wrist brace covers, like something that covers just the palm and doesn't cover much on the back of my hand.

How do you guys dress up?

[gjnl]

There have been some good threads on this topic. Just a few I found quickly:
http://sci.rutgers.edu/forum/showthread.php?t=32682
http://sci.rutgers.edu/forum/showthread.php?t=119068
http://sci.rutgers.edu/forum/showthread.php?t=120122
http://sci.rutgers.edu/forum/showthread.php?t=95270
http://sci.rutgers.edu/forum/showthread.php?t=80708

NL (GJ's wife and caregiver)

[november]

For shoes I do cute flats with buckles, rhinestones, whatever. I'm not really into dressing up. You can find nice dark wash jeans and a cute dressy or even plain top. Add the flats and accessorize w/ jewelry/scarves/purse...you get the point. :)

[truly]

Long dresses are in style, especially now that the warmer months are ahead. They have some really cute styles out now. I haven't worn a dress since my accident. I use hiking poles and still worry about falling. However, a long dress might be just the ticket. No heels for me though!

[~Lin]

There have been some good threads on this topic. Just a few I found quickly:
Thanks :) I'm more looking for an open conversation and talking with people who understand where I'm coming from, than research. For example when talking to my mom she asked why can't I just wear some high leather high heeled boots and skip the ankle braces and orthotics, because they offer more support than shoes... I was kinda speechless!

I have nice pants and some nice pants for nicer things, like I wore slacks and this lacy top my aunt gave me to the wedding. I think I used the wrong words, I don't exactly mean something really fancy. Most of the time I dress like a teenager. I used to occasionally watch reruns of that show 'what not to wear' and pretty much dress like the befores! I did learn about how dark straight leg jeans there though. Mostly I wear flared jeans because I'm short. Its weird, if I buy the 'short' options on jeans they're TOO short, and with regular jeans I can't stand them bunching up at my ankle. So the flared jeans the excess flows over my shoe better.

I have a huge thing for tshirts, that won't ever change. But over the last couple years I've been trying to get some nicer shirts too. I'm trying to dress more like an adult :)

I don't use purses, I can't carry them. When I'm walking my service dog carries anything I need in her packs, and I have a bag attached to my wheelchair as well. I'm also not a jewelry wearer... Never have been there. Once my stepmom bought me a matching necklace/earring set for christmas. It came up talking to my mom, who replied "has she MET you yet?!" hahaha.

The one fashion thing I do have is a thing for coats. I have a ton of cute fall and winter coats from ebay and good will. Besides for ordering my fun tshirts, I do all my shopping on ebay or good will. Awesome finds!

With the chair, I'm really excited about finding cute shoes. I love those ballet flat kinds. Absolutely not an option with my braces! But should work well even with long jeans on the chair? And I am interested in trying some long skirts out! I even have a couple from high school that still fit (I'm only 26.) They're like new because they were only for certain events.

Growing up I was always mega-tomboy. Then as an adult I started to want to be more feminine, but felt like I couldn't! I wonder if its only because the choice was taken away from me that I want it back. I still love my jeans and shirts year round (over long sleeves in winter!) but I want more options. I also still look like a teenager, and I'm sure my manner of dressing doesn't help there! At christmas my aunt asked me how old I was, and then laughed and said how I look younger than her son (who I used to babysit)! I know the whole 'you'll be grateful for it later on' and DO like it at times.

Do you guys get the same way, where the little things drive you nuts? Like I've come to expect about not being able to do the big things... So the little things, especially since others don't understand, are irritating. I don't feel womanly... Or know how to.

[MillsWheels]

Hey Lin
Since the only time I get out is to PT, I get to cop out!
I wear dual swedish knee cages when I'm walking, so it either has to be a jean that can fit under the braces, or something big that can over it, or a capri pant (nice or causual both work usually and thankfully!) that half fits over it (the bulkiest part sits JUST below my knee). In my chaiar I just wear whatever since I rarely get up and walk once I'm in it, I'm either walking a short distance with my braces/forearm crutches or I'm sitting. So I don't have a huge problem I've found a lot of things that work. I prefer very much to wear something under my braces as fi they aren't sitting just right they can rub. I am supposed to be wearing compression hose to help my dysautonomia/bloodflow/blood pressure/blood pooling so that works. I also plan on wearing leggings a lot this summer when its too hot for compression stockings. that way I can feel feminine and nice and not get all bruised up! they even work under a sporty pair of shorts for PT.

For me its jsut a matter of making the effort. I honestly don't most of the time. but even if its just a v necked tee shirt with a cami, and a pair of mesh shorts I feeel better than a baggy tee short and boy shorts. (though oh how comfy the latter is! ;D i'm such a tomboy too)

[MillsWheels]

PS: as far as shoes, I'm usually in my nike's with my custom orthotics/lift since one leg is higher than the other due to significant scoli. I too love a good ballet flat though, or my sports slip ons, or even my ol' chuck taylors. doesn't matter when i'm sitting! heck i wish i could just go barefoot!

[Katja]

A couple of thoughts about bringing your fashion quotient up a notch...

I'm similar to you in that I don't like/tolerate jewelry (although I've learned to wear it more often than I did when I was younger), and don't want a lot of accessories hanging around me. I do wear scarves quite a bit, as they are lighter weight than necklaces.

In order to be more "stylish", I think that if you don't wear many accessories, your clothing has to work harder - it has to fit really well, the color has to suit you, the fabric needs to hang well, the details (collar, buttons, pockets, whatever) need to be right on. So instead of crew neck sports team t-shirts, maybe you're wearing a ballet neck or scoop neck tee made out of a more substantial knit with elbow length or 3/4 length sleeves, or a graphic fashion tee instead of a logo tee.

After years of teeter-tottering back and forth, I've decided (for myself) that there is something of a trade-off between comfort and style, and that looking stylish requires a little more work and a little more conscious thought, and that's just the way it is. What's helped me there is finally getting to the point where just about every piece of clothing I own is something I like, that fits me, and that I'm happy to wear (assuming the appropriate activity/occasion).

[Lilli]

I tend to focus on having a nice looking top half, something in a flattering color and cut, with jewelry. I also keep my hair well groomed. I go for a "natural" look, but wear a little make-up. I keep my hands as well groomed as I can pushing. LOL Below the waist I just keep everything simple. I almost always wear pants. I wear shoes with flat rubber soles that tend to stay on my foot rest and blend in with my pants. All the interesting stuff I keep on the top half. Just make sure the top and bottom go well together and you should look great. I buy pants at places like Penny's, Marshall's and Ross. Tops, any where I find them. I look at thrift stores in rich upscale areas I find some great looking tops.
I definitely look feminine, but not like I'm over compensating.

[Lilli]

I wanted to click "Like" on Katja's post (FB habit).

[Katja]

I wanted to click "Like" on Katja's post (FB habit).

:-)

Thanks!

[betheny]

Because of where I live (Kansas, Texas and Oklahoma so far) I can get away with year-round cowboy boots. I wear them w/ dresses in summer. Due to being An Old, I don't wear short skirts. Just below the knee or maxi works. You can NOT wear the "flowing" type of skirt in a chair. THE SKIRT GETS CAUGHT IN YOUR CASTERS! I can't over-emphasize this, after buying a fowy skirt on ebay and having to crawl out of it into my van. Thank God for boyshorts, a thong in the parking lot would have mortified me for life! So remember, w/ longer skirts-Gotta go a bit slinkier. This works well for me since I'm skinny with no hips or boobs (I also have Graves disease).

Have you seen the movie Country Strong? Gwyneth Paltrow is biting my style head-to-toe in that movie!

Ppl think I'm tall, but I think 5'5" isn't tall.

I can walk a very short distance. I need an AFO but don't have one. The 2" or so heel on a good cowboy boot makes walking much easier. They have also saved me some road rash and probably broken bones. Look cute w/ skinny jeans tucked in, at least I think so.

I also like the sandals that zip up the back. I have a few in a modified metallic gladiator style. They're a godsend w/ my finger function issues. Cute w/ dresses, shorts, jeans.

My first pair of post sci shoes were hi-top chuck taylors, black w/ flames. I was in defiance mode, wore those w/ sundresses LOL.

You can ebay cowboy boots btw. They can be modified to zip down the sides or back by any good saddle shop or shoe repair place. Maybe they're not so feminine but I think mine are. One pair of rockabilly style, short, scalloped top, black lizard Lucchese's-those are Ferrari boots, got 'em for an unbelievable $100 on ebay. Also have new, taller light brown w/ embroidered white roses on them. Ppl scoff but those boots will kill in New Mexico, w/ a slinky dress, skinny leather jacket and awesome silver/turquoise jewelry.

As the old song said, I was country when country wasn't cool. It's worked out so far!

I feel your pain. Buying shoes for/with an AFO is a nightmare.

[skippy13]

I live in Oregon and always get compliments on my cowboy boots. I recently had the toes and heels capped with ornately engraved silver ornaments from an artist in Montana. The silver actually helps keep the toes from getting banged up when I use them as a door battering ram. I love my boots and they help keep the ankles straight when transferring.

I also wear all the high heels I own. Some have four inch heels and I bet I could never have walked in those even AB, but since I don't always walk, I wear thos sinful heels.

[~Lin]

So many replies! You guys are awesome. I haven't replied sooner because I didn't have the focus I wanted to give all the replies.

Mills, thats not an excuse! lol. Most of the time all I go to is Drs appointments. I don't mind wearing PJ pants and a sweatshirt to the food pantry or grocery store ;) So even the Drs appointments are an option, if you wanted to. When I do get out I like to pretend I'm a real fully functioning person, so I'd like to look nice and put together for Drs appointments even :) I don't have any jeans that fit over my donjoy brace, so I just wear it over. Most of my jeans (again, teenage/juniors clothing haha) are stretchy and snug at the thigh and knee. It works because I can't wear it on my bare skin, it irritates my skin too much. over the winter what I was doing was wearing a pair of tights, then the brace, then my PJs over that. Once I was sitting on my bed with my pjs rolled up to my thigh putting on the brace over a pair of white tights. My roommate stops and goes "OH! You're wearing TIGHTS! I was thinking, she's not THAT pale is she?!" I always joke that I'm so pale I glow :) My friend that I went to the wedding with went "have you always been that pale?" when he saw me, and I answered "yes"

How much does the compression stuff help? I've been told to try, but its another thing I'd have to pay for out of pocket. When I don't have my feet up though my legs swell and I get purply from a vascular skin condition. Thats what I want to cover up, I get so embarrased. Its especially annoying when I see my dermatologist, because she can't see the status of my actual skin when I'm all purple, it makes the scars look identical to the existing stuff. If I could just take off compression hose when she gets to the room instead of propping my legs up in the waiting room and exam room hoping its enough time that would be so much easier!

Thanks Katja! I don't have any sports tshirts, they're mostly all graphic art ones. Some have writing though like my "America, only the insured survive" tshirt or my "Got Carbs?" ones lol. Like this is one of my favs, is that what you mean by graphic art?
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/b/0/0/5/1/AAAACyMc9GwAAAAAAAUVZg.png?v=1226538436000

Those ones are all crew neck though I think. I have some just plain colored shirts with different necks, stuff like the fitted but long to the hips ones. Thats the sort of thing that I've been trying to branch into more. Is that good? Though I guess you lose the length of it when you're just sitting down. Thats the problem with a lot of my coats. I love fitted peacoats and have a few that are long, like mid thigh or even knee. But I was thinking those won't work in the chair!

I don't do much with my hair because its too difficult. But I've learned how to better care for my hair, its naturally wavy/curly and looks nice just down and loose now so I don't have it constantly in a ponytail. I think that helps! And sometimes I'll french braid it after a shower, and if I wrap it at night I can leave it in the french braid for days. (I only wash my hair once a week)

Betheny, thanks for the tip about flowy skirts!!! Thats something I was wanting to try for summer, so good to know before I've spent money! Funny that you mentioned graves, I'm the opposite. I have hypothyrodism and suddenly got boobs at 23!

I don't like cowboy boots much. I used to train horses and teach lessons. I rode both english and western, but western I always wore lacers (http://www.pfiwestern.com/images/products/1500/32521%20BRN.jpg) I also prefer them and lace paddock boots vs zip ones for more ankle support. When I was last riding regularly, I was able to get away with my quality paddock boots and athletic type ankle braces and orthotics inside. That was important, because the ankle braces I have to switch into for walking dont give me the range of motion/ankle flexion needed to ride! I think cowboy boots and country dressing can definitely be feminine. I used to go line dancing in highschool with a bunch of friends from the barn. And a good friend of mine wore cowboy boots with her wedding dress. The groomsmen all had cowboy boots and hats on, but her dress was to the floor and you couldn't see her feet. When she pulled up the skirt to remove the garter I started cracking up because she was wearing an old well worn pair of black cowboy boots :)

[Katja]

Thanks Katja! I don't have any sports tshirts, they're mostly all graphic art ones. Some have writing though like my "America, only the insured survive" tshirt or my "Got Carbs?" ones lol. Like this is one of my favs, is that what you mean by graphic art?
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/b/0/0/5/1/AAAACyMc9GwAAAAAAAUVZg.png?v=1226538436000


No, by "graphic tee" I mean something more fashion forward and feminine than a short sleeved crew neck men's t-shirt, even with something cool printed on it. Something like these: http://www.forever21.com/Product/Category.aspx?br=f21&category=top_graphict, or these: http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/womens/tops_shirts/graphic_tees.jsp.

Caveat: I don't shop at Forever21 (because I'm more than twice that old and I don't do disposable trends), and I don't wear t-shirts. I have a stack of shirts from 10Ks and triathlons and other events that never, ever see the light of day.

[~Lin]

Ah ok. Personally I thought everything on the forever21 page was horrible lol, definitely not my style. The ones on the kohls page were nice. They look similar to the plain colored tops I've gotten in the last few years.

[Katja]

Yeah, Forever21 is a particular kind of style.

I've pretty much given up on pants; I wear stretchy yoga pants at home, but for work pants that fit properly standing up and walking are too short and too tight for using the wheelchair. I wear skirts at work almost all the time, usually pencil skirts with some stretch. I have a few midi skirts, but Bethany is right on - you have to be super careful about getting them caught in something.

[crypticgimp]

forever21 is best to shop at in fall and winter. i LOVE their little jackets. i have an unhealthy obsession with short jackets lol most of my clothes i get from there. and it's a weight that works year round but once spring/summer come around, things get too frilly for me. i'm not that kind of girl!

i usually do the jeggings + some sort of v neck top + a cardigan + funky earrings + a belt (hides the quad belly and holds the sweater so it doesn't get caught in the wheels) and a black fake leather moto jacket for fall/winter/spring. contrasting colors keeps the eye moving along the body. today's outfit was a burnt orange cable shawl collar sweater, with a blue and black striped puff sleeve sweater under it, a basketweave belt with my moto jacket, jeggings and hot pink chuck tailers. complete with metallic, looooooong peackcock earrings.

i also decided to grow a mohawk, so that is adding a nice change to my usually bald head!

once summer hits i hope to get some off the shoulder tunics and make some crazy necklaces like aubrey o'day wears on celebrity apprentice! i always try to have statement jewelry (the bigger the better imho lol) and work the outfit. i am not afraid of color(scotch guard is your friend!) but i am real into skirts but i love leggings so will try to find some shorts that don't look like i am wearing underwear :/

i love my graphic tees from f21, they are deep scoop necks or off the shoulder but also they are long! i only wear tops that are 29inches or longer and f21 is the only store i know where they show the measurements of each piece.

[darlagee22]

I almost gave up on wearing jeans, khakis or nice slacks because they didn't fit right seated- too high and bunchy in the front, too low in the back, too hard to pull up. I tried adding elastic, moving buttons, misc alternations, but they were still too akward and not worth the work. Then my daughter suggested I try the new maternity styles with a lightweight elastic waistband which meets the pants low in front and can easily roll down in front without bulk and stay high in the back. I can choose current styles of jeans, khakis, non-stretchpant capris and slacks and they are easy to pull up. I go to the factory outlet nearby. Old Navy also has them.

[Katja]

What a great idea! I'm going to check that out.

I had a pair of jeans made by INDI (http://www.indicustom.com/) with a very low front rise and very long back rise. They're not bad, but not perfect. It took 3 tries to get the pair I have now, and I just didn't have the energy to go through another iteration.

[crypticgimp]

i compensate by wearing long tops. anything that is 27 - 33inches in length. this also helps me to look longer in the torso but also, shorter tops hit right at the quad belly, making me look bigger than i actually am

[Sue Pendleton]

I hate my quad gut! I am always looking for Ts that are nice, have cool abstract graphics with maybe a bit of metallic to them and.....short enough that when in my chair the front doesn't bunch up. Finders fee will be offered if any of you know where I can find something that is maybe 24-25" from back of neck to back hem with all of the above. I have Chico's covered already. And I really need a couple of button down blouses that have a straight bottom hem no shirt tails and maybe a bit longer then Ts. Three quarter length sleeves would be best. Long sleeve cuffs get filthy pushing any where and short sleeves show off some not so smooth elbows. Also saw and like some of the almost peasant type tops in different bright colors and a bit of metallic near the neckline. Yes, I have a casual high school reunion the end of July and Tommy Bahama has dropped most of his womens line for menswear. Life in summer was much easier when he had a huge line. And I will lose the weight so I can fit back into that suff hanging in my closet!


Cryptic, I find the perfect length to hide the gut is if the top hits about an inch above where your thighs start when seated. On me the longer stuff just bunches up and adds to the gut. Chico's also has some pants that are cut just low enough that they don't leave bruises on my stomach but also cover my butt. I'm too old to show off my ass for free. ;-)

Right now I'm trying to take off about 20 pounds that my last PCP let me gain by not having a scale. Then I'll be buying new Lee side elastic jeans, can order them only online from Pennys, Kohls and I think Sears, in every color and all the denim they have. Without back pockets I've had few sore issues over the last 20 years and they are durable for daily wear.

[~Lin]

I was staying at a friends house for a couple days recently and saw this tv commercial for this thing that makes it look like your top is layered and helps cover that area on your stomach/hips, like a dickie but for that area. I was like WHOA, actually I'd love those... I need to find what it was! You got 4 in an order, each a different color. They looked like halter tops, but you wore them around your stomach/hips under your top.

I need to find some longer tops. And nice tops, not just tshirts lol. I have such an obsession with tshirts though, especially ones from threadless.com. I wish I had money! I'm wanting to buy some dresses/skirts for the summer from goodwill. One problem I realized is due to the way I sit they will all have to be long enough to cover my knees. I sit in my chair with a couple inches between my legs, I can't sit with my knees together because it hurts my hips. So I'll need stuff long enough that I'm not giving anyone a show!

[crypticgimp]

i had to google what a dickie was... lol

[~Lin]

lol cryptic! I don't think I've ever worn a dickie. In the commerical they compared it to them, so that was one of the things I remembered and thought was helpful when trying to describe it.

Found it! If anyone has a tailor I'm sure they would be easy to make. I may try making some myself since I sew, looks pretty simple. I just don't usually work with that type of material (stretchy tshirt). They can probably be found cheaper, but here's the site from when I googled:

https://www.asseenontv.com/hip-t-layering-accessory-for-your-hips/detail.php?p=365893

A good way to make sure you aren't showing crack, don't have too much bulk in the stomach area, and wear your shorter tops but still have something that goes to that perfect length discussed by a few here.

I've been debating making a vanity cover for my chair. I have a Jay 3 and it didn't come with the vanity flap. But going into summer, I was thinking it might be nicer to leave that bit open for airflow. But don't want to be showing anything... These seem like a possible fix.

[Sue Pendleton]

http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/intimates/shapewear/torso_backslimming/PRD~505176/Maidenform+Control+It+Firm+Control+Nipper+Tube+Top ++12468.jsp

I was thinking of one of these because of the comments about the main part not being like a control garment. I find most binder type things ride up or down. Lin your idea sounds pretty good. My only problem with either is the "step into it like pants or a skirt". Umm, hard to do.

[Lorrie]

I live in S. Fl. I wear stilettos, Sky tops, jeans, mermaid skirts, maxi dresses....almost anything I want :) For inexpensive every day wear, I do like to shop online at Alloy and Body Central. The quality is pretty much reflective of the cost but fun none the less :)
As long as you can without any repercussions, wear what you feel good in!

[crypticgimp]

I live in S. Fl. I wear stilettos, Sky tops, jeans, mermaid skirts, maxi dresses....almost anything I want :) For inexpensive every day wear, I do like to shop online at Alloy and Body Central. The quality is pretty much reflective of the cost but fun none the less :)
As long as you can without any repercussions, wear what you feel good in!
i LOVE your personal style! it's fierce.

i wish i could wear adult shoes but my feet are about a 2.5 children's size :/ everything else grew except for them! but sometimes i can find a good shoe on sale at zappos or target but then i feel bummed that little kids shoes look like adult shoes. it seems wrong. they should all wear jellies!! lol

i like that idea Lin but seems like you could do that with an old tshirt? just cut it at an angle? but it also wouldnt restrict my mitro, which is always a concern!

[cyfskid]

At the op why not just use your chair when u wanna wear high heels

[sreneet]

I found some tops I really like at JCP made by Unity World Wear. I live in Texas so cool material is a must. The tops that are made of polyester/spandex are really soft and cool. The polyester are cool too but not as soft. If you have a JCP nearby I would go look at them in the store instead of ordering online. I have found some of the petite fit me better because they aren't as long. They also have alot of peasant tops, just search peasant.

Here's a link the Unity World tops at JCP;
http://www.jcpenney.com/dotcom/jsp/search/results.jsp?fromSearch=true&Ntt=Unity+world&ruleZoneName=XGNSZone&grView=&_requestid=728024

[~Lin]

My only problem with either is the "step into it like pants or a skirt". Umm, hard to do.

I'm sure you could pull it over your head too, and then slide it down. Thats the way I'd do it. Even though I can stand I don't put on pants standing because I can't stand on my left leg alone.

If a cut tshirt was the right size and stretchy enough to stay in place there it would work too. I don't think any of my tshirts are the right material to do that with, and then theres my concern about sewing with that kind of material since I'm not experienced. But I might give it a shot, because I was looking around online and I swear they're all much more expensive than I saw in that tv commercial! It probably needs the just right amount of snugness so it won't slide down.

[crypticgimp]

I'm sure you could pull it over your head too, and then slide it down. Thats the way I'd do it. Even though I can stand I don't put on pants standing because I can't stand on my left leg alone.

If a cut tshirt was the right size and stretchy enough to stay in place there it would work too. I don't think any of my tshirts are the right material to do that with, and then theres my concern about sewing with that kind of material since I'm not experienced. But I might give it a shot, because I was looking around online and I swear they're all much more expensive than I saw in that tv commercial! It probably needs the just right amount of snugness so it won't slide down.
it prolly is made of lycra or some sort of jersey fabric. yea i'd pull it over my head too.

[sjean423]

I don't think any of my tshirts are the right material to do that with, and then theres my concern about sewing with that kind of material since I'm not experienced.

If you aren't much for sewing, try and buy a top specifically to cut .... one that has a lot of lycra, possibly even a cami. That way the hem is already there, it is what will show the most. Then cut the top part off, and finish off the cut edge. It isn;t going to show ... it will be under your regular top, so the easiest way would be just to ziz zag over the edge or turn it under and stitch on a sewing machine to keep it from running or fraying. It won't show, so it doesn't have to be neat.

Do you have a Kohls near you? You could make your own for a lot less than the one on the tv, just by cutting the top off a cami.

This one is lycra spandex (http://www.kohls.com/upgrade/webstore/product_page.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=8455248928525 39&crosssell=true). Or even cheaper cotton spandex ones (http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/zbrandskiosk/juniors/so/layeryourlook/tanks/PRD~207299/SO+SatinTrim+Camisole.jsp), if you are looking for just coverage, not the slimming factor..... they are only $5.

[~Lin]

I've been trying to find cheap camis and haven't! I sew, just not that kind of material. I sketch my own patterns and make a lot of stuff, it's how I pay my bills along with leather work lol. I've been sewing more since I got my chair, my back doesn't tolerate long in a regular chair but I can last hours longer in my wheelchair. I do mostly pet supplies. Collars, leashes, dog clothing, cat/dog beds, small animal beds (cosy cups), small animal hammocks, saddle pads, polo wraps... Lol. But when it comes to stretchy fabric I use fleece. I've always been nervous about lycra and spandex blends.

edit: those are more expensive than the price on tv. I wonder if there's another maker of the same product, because it was like 19.99 for 4. Basic colors like one white, black, nude, and pink. I know fabric would be cheaper, especially if I can find some clearance. I need to just start playing around. I've been planning on making some wrist brace covers from 4 way stretch material. I need to hit up the clearance bins at the fabric stores...

[Sue Pendleton]

Lin, it has been 20 years since I finished sewing drapes and curtains for our last townhouse in Germany and that was with fabrics I sometimes had to stabilize so they wouldn't stretch. Back in high school though when single jerseys and double knits first hit fabric stores I had a basic zigzag Singer machine. I made a halter top with a really expensive knit so practiced on some scraps. Try stretching the material evenly behind and infront of the feeder as it goes through. Once you finish a piece and it doesn't pucker you should have it down. Oh, check fabric content carefully. Do not use unmercerized thread on a cotton spandex blend fabric.
Might google Flexees for a seconds catalog or store they sell through. Most that TV stuff is cheap because they make their money selling your name as someone who has a credit card to every catalog in the western world.

[Sue Pendleton]

I live in S. Fl. I wear stilettos, Sky tops, jeans, mermaid skirts, maxi dresses....almost anything I want :) For inexpensive every day wear, I do like to shop online at Alloy and Body Central. The quality is pretty much reflective of the cost but fun none the less :)
As long as you can without any repercussions, wear what you feel good in!

Lorrie,
Whenever I get stuck with yet another student OT or PT sitting in on my sessions I let them have it about clothing. "Do NOT let your patients wear sweats unless they have stitches still in somewhere that needs covered. Do not even teach them how to put on sweatpants. Too many docs do not have scales and many of us forget about full length mirrors. Sweatshirts are fine because we tend to get cold but suggest nice ones with some detail. And women need to wear bras and not those sleeping things that are as sexy as a 90 year olds bloomers!" Glad you realized right away to stay in what made you feel and look good.

Now I'm back to watching portion control and anything with cholesterol and soon will start assisted sit ups again. Yes, my previous doc got a scorcher email more so about my lipid levels than my weight. He was giving me total cholesterol not that my good kind was so low it doesn't count and I already was watching most animal fats.

[DigeeRN]

I SO hear you. I found that lately I have been basing my whole wardrobe around a brace! Makes me realize that men have it a lot easier. I have found some pretty nice (and even fun) shoes that are working well for me besides sneakers. I don't use a chair, so I have no option to wear my old favorites (boots, sandals) My brace is carbon fiber and has a thin footplate. Girls, don't hide yourselves. Rock what you got!

Here are few links to cute orthotic friendly shoes.

http://www.roamans.com/Product.aspx?PfId=237781&ProductTypeId=1&affiliate_id=017&mr:trackingCode=642E5982-7252-E111-870B-0019B9C043EB&mr:referralID=NA&affiliate_location_id=01&WT.mc_id=k526055&mid=j102496k526055

http://www.amazon.com/MenS-Canvas-Zipper-Sneaker-Pink/dp/B004K2JFNC/ref=sr_1_40?ie=UTF8&qid=1340058988&sr=8-40&keywords=demonia+sneakers

I am a womans 8 and buy a mens 7. The extra width really helps with the brace and these demonia shoes are punked out and fun.

[wheeliegirl]

I work in a pretty casual office, but I wear dresses or skirts almost every day lately. It's far less of a hassle when using the bathroom. For a smoother look I also wear a one-piece Spanx garment underneath. There is a hole in the crotch for easy "access". I already used a catheter without removing my underwear, so getting used to the Spanx was easy. I have not yet had to remove them in a hurry for an emergency BM (knock on wood!!!!). Other than the ease of access in the bathroom, I think it just looks nicer to wear a dress or skirt.

When I was able bodied I wore a lot of suits/jackets. But these are difficult to manage when using a chair. The sides rub on the tires or the arms and shoulders may be too tight and uncomfortable, binding when pushing my chair. So, I don't wear suit jackets anymore, and have switched to wearing a lot of twin sets and light sweaters. I'm lucky to live in Southern California, where you only need a coat about once or twice a year. :-)

As far as shoes, I can wear strappy wedge heels, but anything higher than 1 1/2 inches is uncomfortable and makes my knees too high, which puts more pressure on my butt bones. The higher the height of the shoe, the more I must be concious of the placement of my feet on my footplate. Very high shoes cause my ankles to bend over, and that makes my feet look funny. I can't wear high spikey heels or those cute "princess/ballerina" slip-on shoes because they come off whenever I transfer in/out of my car, or to/from the toilet. Gross, who wants to be in a public restroom in bare feet! In the Winter I have a couple of pairs of boots. I once got an unexplained pressure sore on my pinky toe. I don't think it was because of my shoes, as more of a problem with the chair I had at the time, and the way my left foot always slid over, and the outside of my foot would be pushed against the frame that held the footplate. In any case, since then I threw out all of my shoes and started over buy buying only "wide" width shoes. They are very hard to find in stores. Most of the shoes that I buy are from online catalogs, the Naturalizer store or plus sized clothing stores.

I try to look as fashionable as possible. I feel like the first thing that people look at is my feet, because people tend to look down at my legs to "inspect" me. I don't know why this is, but when people first see me, it seems like they need to see my legs to see if they are "normal" looking. Which, by the way, my legs are not very atrophied. I don't know why this is, one is a little skinnier than the other, but not very noticeable. For the most part, except for the scabs on my knees from running into things, my legs look pretty normal.

I understand wanting to dress as nicely as possible. Dressing, to me, is really important. I have gained a lot of weight since my injury 15 years ago. I feel and look fatter than I am. In my mind's eye I feel like I look like a huge, over-filled tick with a tiny head and arms/legs. Of course I know this is ridiculous. I obviously have a very poor self image. I don't know what to do about it. I have a huge stomach and large breasts and while sitting in my chair everything is all squished together. Ugh! I NEVER look at myself in the mirror from the neck down. I will only look at myself from the neck up. I avoid looking at myself in full length mirrors and windows. To me, next to the obvious bladder and bowel problems, is number 3 on my list of things I hate about being paralyzed.

One thing to remember when wearing a dress or a skirt is to keep your knees together! I didn't realize this problem until one day, many years ago, a woman coworker of mine told me that she could see clear up to my vajayjay!!!!! After that I got some knee/leg straps from SportAid.com and wear one all of the time. It makes it nicer to keep things from constantly falling off of my lap too.